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Photos of step children

Cbear's picture

Hi all. New to this. I have a picture of my biological son up In our play room. He is 2. I have 2 step children 9+13. The 13 yo causes me a lot of anxiety so I struggle to have photos up of them. They don’t live with us but visit. My sister in law visited today and asked why no pics and have I thought that could hurt him. I feel bad but I have to think of feeling comfortable in my home. Am I a terrible person? Do others have pics up of their step children?  Thanks 

rozzann's picture

Hi Cbear!  We got married and moved into our home 4 years ago and I JUST put up pics of the kids.  I actually didn't even put up any of my own biokids so I wouldn't have to have a reason for not putting any of the weird/awkward SD.  And the pics I finally put up I made sure to put SD's where it was not in my direct viewing.  Wink

So no, you aren't a terrible person.  I would put it up somewhere you don't have to see it....lol.

Focused_onourlife's picture

If you personally want to put up a pic for YOUR DH of his BS then do so on your own time (DH probably won't and doesn't care one way) but don't go run out to buy a picture frame all because SIL said something. And if she say something else about the pic tell her to ask her brother where's SS pic. Your house your decor... and don't let her bully you into doing things HER way for her nephew.

Alien's picture

My skids look nothing like my dh but a lot like bm. I FORCED myself to put couple of pictures of them just to make my dear husband happy. It makes me wanna puke each time I look at them because again...just like bm. 

I still picked only those pics where my BS (10months) is with them lol 

hereiam's picture

Do others have pics up of their step children?

I believe there is a picture of my SD on the peg board in the garage (not even kidding).

I don't decorate with family photos, and I don't have any bios, so it's an easy out for me.

It's really none of your SIL's business. I can see her point, but it's not her business. If your husband is concerned about it, he can talk to you.

Monkeysee's picture

We have pics of us & SS’s up in the house. I really like the SS’s & dont mind at all having pics of them around, they’ve been a lovely addition in my life (for the most part).

We used to have a couple of DH’s daughter up as well, but after her little stunt last year of reaching out to DH after years of no contact, only to have it turn into a ploy for money, those pics have been trashed. 

I’ll never stop DH from having a relationship with his daughter (though it’s extremely doubtful that will ever happen), but I don’t need to see her smug face on my wall. Thank you, next.

Rags's picture

We are  not pictures on display people.  We gravitate much more to the photo album model where they can be pulled out periodically if there is a reason to show someone the pictures or if we want to review memories, etc....

Mostthanklessjobever's picture

I removed all of our "family" photos because I could not stand to look at SD21's smirk in every one of them.  We do have 2 large shelves in my husband's office that has framed photos of both Skids and my bio's.  I try not to look at the skids photos.  My DH has a picture on his desk of skids and I always make it "accidently" get slid behind something else so I don't have to look at them when I am sitting at the computer.  

So, no I do not think you should feel bad or obligated.  This is YOUR home, not your SIL's.  

thisgirlrighthere's picture

I'm not big on having personal photos on display, my husband is total opposite. I don't mind a picture or two on display, but he goes all out and pretty much has a shrine to SD. Everywhere you go in the house, she's looking at you. I think there needs to be compromise. A few pictures, but not in excess. We're actually adding a new living room onto the house and I already expressed to him I'd like no personal pictures nailed to the wall. 

I can't expect him to have ZERO pictures up, but he also can't go hog wild and nail a picture of her up on every corner of the house.