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paying child support for the ss that sexually abused bs

inneedofhelp's picture

Hello,

My 5 year old bio son was sexually abused by my 15 yo ss. My ss has been placed in a residential treatment facility in a sexually agressive youth treatment program. Apparently because they are collecting public monies, I as a sf am forced to pay child support. As if that was not bad enough, I am paying almost double that of the bio dad to the sexual offender. So this is my predicament. I as the father of the sexually molested son, am paying the most child support for my ss to be treated. How is this possibly right. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

Inneedofhelp

sweetthing's picture

OMG that is so wrong! I don't have anything but sympathy to offer. To me the BF ought to be paying for your poor 5 year old to get the therapy he will most certainly need. What does your wife think about this?

inneedofhelp's picture

She is obviously torn because both are her sons, but this is going to cost us our livelihood if something is not done. I am in the process of petitioning the court for a reduction yet who knows how long that will take.

we are both at wits end. I am absolutley furious at this......just cannot believe it.

inneedofhelp's picture

On January 22, 2010 I was court ordered to pay $320 every two weeks to the residential center my ss is in. My wife was also ordered on this day to pay $265 every two weeks to this center. The BF did not even show up to court and his payment has stayed the same at, get this $134 every two weeks which he has been paying since 2003. They are not going after the step mother either, just so many questions...ugh

Last-Wife's picture

As a mother of a child who was molested by a stepchild in our care I would NOT put up with this. I know the pain my feelings have caused my husband, but I have to protect my child first...

You should not be financially responsible for this.
"I HAD to pick the road less traveled..."

Anon2009's picture

I'm sorry you have to go through this.

I'd definitely be talking to a lawyer about this. Your son really needs you. I think the bio-dad should be paying for SS to be in the treatment facility.

I also think that you shouldn't allow your son to be around SS. If your wife wants to see him or spend the night with him, fine but she needs to do so elsewhere. Your son has been through so much and I think he'd benefit from counseling.

inneedofhelp's picture

Yes, they have not had contact since, and will not. My wife understands and when she goes to visit I stay with my little man..........It would have been easier for me if I would have just buried the ss as i really truly wanted too...then at least my biological son could survive and would have a home....however I am a Fed Officer and this would not look good....lol

JMC's picture

I don't even know what to say - this is so wrong on so many levels. My heart goes out to you and your little boy. As Confused68 suggested, maybe there is some way you can get assistance as your BS is definitely a victim.

Rags's picture

I am sorry to say this but that 15yo deviant would not be my son any longer if I was your wife. If I was her I would have informed him that no one abuses my child PERIOD. Even if the abuser is another of my children. That may very well be the only offense that would make a child dead to me. One thing that my parents always made vary clear to us was not to come between Mom and Dad and do not come between Mom and Dad and one of the other kids. The one making that attempt would loose.

IMHO that little disgusting piece of shit is lucky to not have been beaten to within an inch of his disgusting life.

Child molesters are the scum of the humanity and a molester that preys on a sibling is the worst of the scum. I really don't give a crap if it is the result of a mental illness or not.

I would not spend a penny on that kid if I was you. If I had to I would take my BS and leave just to avoid paying anything on Chester the Molester. I concur with others who recommended that you get an attorney. Get one now.

I know you are a tough spot. Supporting your wife during this is important. But ....... this is one situation where my child would take precident over my spouse if my spouse put the deviant little piece of shit over the 5yo. These two children should not even be comparable in this situation.

Just my thoughts of course.

Best regards,

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)