The other side of the greedy SM coin
Sharing, because it might resonate. It's an Ask Amy column where a stepmother to adult children is ignored and she and her husband are disagreeing over what to do with their collective wealth upon their death, the vast majority of which the SM brought to the marriage:
"Here’s the issue: I brought the vast majority of our considerable net worth into the marriage. My husband wants to leave a large amount to this son and his wife, but I am opposed to this. I have other long-standing, loving relationships that I would like to recognize (although I have no children of my own)."
Amy basically tells the woman to allocate her personal assets as she wishes and allow her husband to do the same with his personal assets.
http://www.denverpost.com/2017/09/26/ask-amy-invisible-mil-might-make-he...
I brought more assets to the
I brought more assets to the marriage than my DH did - BUT he was the one who wanted to make sure what I wanted to do with my assets if I predeceased him (as I am almost a decade older).
I have a trust set up that will make sure that my DH does not live in poverty - but will also assure that none of my assets will go to worthless POS SS EVER.
My DH was concerned that my assets would be allocated as I WANTED THEM TO BE. He never was trying to figure out what he could get to give to his disgusting offspring.
You can leave your estate to
You can leave your estate to any one you want, charities, family members... there's no rule saying you have to leave anything to skids.
DH can leave his to his children, it's not your fault he does not have much....
Our laws are totally different from yours, we do not have to leave anything to a spouse, and life insurance is not a must with us, I'm leaving some of my assets to my son, and I'm leaving allot to the SPCA in my town. My kid accepted it and he knows why.... SO was pissed off cause I did not name his daughter in my will, I asked why should I?? She has a father and a mother and just because her mother is useless and has nothing, why should I step in? The argument was Deigma will get allot more then Aergia one day... I just laughed and said not my problem Hon... but now that argument will never happen again.... once the house is sold, I will take my half and be done.. Aergia is getting nothing from either her parents upon their deaths, cause they have to much debt and this combined property was the only real asset SO had.... my will is already changed
Yep-we made separate wills
Yep-we made separate wills too to protect our separate offspring. It is only fair. I brought the most into our property but DH has semi-supported me since, paid all the bills etc, but then he does earn considerably more than me.
Not a lawyer, but I think it
Not a lawyer, but I think it is a little more complicated after the fact. She's just thinking about this now? DH and I sorted this out before we got married. His assets are in his name and go to his kids. Mine are in my name and go to my kids. We got a prenup just in case and it is all spelled out in our wills. Our stepkids' attitudes had nothing to do with it- we all get along reasonably well; though if I were treated like cr@p I would be especially attentive to the distribution of assets. This lady has bigger problems. Like why her DH wants to leave any assets, let alone hers, to his a$$ kid and what keeps her from disengaging. And why is she calling herself a MIL and not a SM?
With no will a large chunk of the assets would probably go to the surviving spouse (possibly all of the assets if the deceased has no children) and then to the spouse's heirs.
The way I see it. SS has a
The way I see it. SS has a mother and a father involved and providing for him. He has two parents he can inherit from. My DD has a mother and a father (DH) as well. I will not short her to give SS a piece of my assets under some BS pretense of fairness. It's not my problem if BM doesn't accumulate any sort of assets to pass onto him.
I have no bios right now, but
I have no bios right now, but if DH and I do have any bios, I've told DH that I would expect our bios to get all of my assets and then the same equal portion of his assets that his sons will receive. Our bios would have one family - ours - to support them. SSs will have ours and BMs to support them. Not my problem if BM can't manage her money.
I've also told DH that if his kids try to make trouble over his assets, I'll leave everything to a local cat shelter (I really dislike cats).
My daughters are my
My daughters are my beneficiaries, my husband is contingent. If I die before my kids are out of high school, I want to make sure their college is paid for. I don't expect my husband would ever see my kids again if I die and I'm sure he wouldn't give them a penny. Also, I don't want a penny of my money going to greedy BM.