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O/T Seriously HOW do you deal with this?

TASHA1983's picture

I am in major need of advice and help!!!

I work in an office with a woman that grates on every last nerve that I have and then some. I hate her to the point that if she was on fire I would break out the smores!!!

I have my reasons and I know I am not perfect of course but seriously I need some advice from you ladies on how to deal with this until I can find another job.

Just so you can get an idea of what I am dealing with and have a visual...looks wise she is a middle aged Kim Kardashian wannabe. We work in a hvac supply house...really lady??? She is completely fake, voice, the way she acts, you name it. She kisses major ass to anything with a penis and she is a major attention whore. As far as work is concerned...she had her hours changed to come in earlier and leave earlier, 95% of the time she is LATE to work. I am always early. She is ALWAYS shooting the shit with everyone and it is part of her job to HELP ME with the phones.
I have brought this to my Mgrs attention in the past. I know the drill, when you go to the Mgr to "complain" about someone you NEVER tell them your personal feelings about a person you just address the business concern. We have been in my Mgrs office a few times. She puts on this big act like she doesn't understand why I don't like her and makes herself out to be the victim etc and she says things to my Mgr like she will answer the phone after the 2nd ring if I am unable to get it...yeah well we all know how THAT went. She is on personal calls alot, I have heard her on the phone with Comcast, Fuel Assistance and she has been on those calls long periods of time just on HOLD!!! It drives me nuts to have to work with someone like this for 40 hours a week and no matter what she does my Mgr does nothing and it just keeps on day after day. I know that my major resentment and hatred towards her has alot to do with my bosses not taking care of the issues with her but how can they when she puts on a huge fake front and everyone in this place I work "drinks the koolaid" and she can do nooo wrong!!!

I definitely don't want to be here any longer. But I obviously need to get my ducks in a row before I do, so I would appreciate any help/advice you ladies/gents can give me to help me make it thru without pummeling this bitch til I can get a new job!!! Thanks!!!

TASHA1983's picture

Also....I listen to music at my desk to drown her out and I leave the office to go do other tasks so I don't have to hear her bullshit act with co-workers/customers. I don't even look at her because I can't stand her that much!!! HELP!!!! Sad

TASHA1983's picture

Thank you helps to know that I am not alone. And I sincerely hope that everything works out for you and you get a better boss to work for. Smile

Tuff Noogies's picture

DISENGAGE! the workplace is a lot like a dysfunctional family- she sounds like the irritating MIL, or SIL, or whoever that lots of us have to deal with. Do your job, and do it well, while ignoring her antics and laughing at how ridiculous she is. make sure your workplace give-a-fuck is busted too Wink

TASHA1983's picture

LMAO!!! Love that! So how exactly would I do that? I already ignore her and I never even look at her or talk to her unless I absolutely have to...and I still get annoyed and hate her!!! Sad

Tuff Noogies's picture

"Not my employee, not my problem" and repeat and repeat and repeat.
u're getting paid to do ur job, regardless of what anyone else there does.

she's like a skid, and ur manager is like a disney dad, letting her get away with anything, and as long as he allows that then there's nothing u can do except change your inner dialog.

it's hell, i know. i've been there before too. also may help to remind yourself that it's temporary (esp since u said u're trying to get outta there)

keep your mantras going, and remember "this too shall pass'... ((hugs))

giveitago's picture

I agree with tuff, she is probably getting off on the fact that she can annoy you. The manager know this, he's really not in a position to fire someone 'just because', or risk being sued for wrongful dismissal, so it's up to you to to take the lead, ignore her pathetic attention seeking behaviors and see how quickly the work force follows you. This person is jealous of you, believe it or not! Smile and be polite, trust me it only takes a very short time for this to work!
Once I stopped letting SD push my buttons the change in her behavior was almost overnight!
Focus more on you, smile inwardly to yourself when you see her behaving like a slut, remind yourself that you are WAY above that crap!

TASHA1983's picture

Thanks for the great advice/reply! So you think she is jealous of me? I wonder if it has to do with the fact that a few years ago her married BF told her that I was pretty/attractive (that is what SHE told me!!!)??? LOL. I am 15 years younger than her, she is 44 and I am 29. If you saw how this "woman" dresses you would swear it was the other way around. She is definitely a pathetic attention whore. Sad.

2Tired4Drama's picture

You've been given really good advice, mainly to do your job and ignore her.

However, I will add one other piece: No matter where you work, you will eventually wind up having to deal with (at least) one asshole. She is the one you have to deal with where you are now. This is a common workplace phenomenon that everyone has to come to grips with. Learn how to mentally let go of these assholes as best you can, as it will be a life-long skill you will use often.

The only time to intervene with management is if you can directly show that her antics or lack of performance may have a direct impact on you or your performance, or more importantly for management, if it is affecting the company's bottom line - in other words, Money talks and bullshit walks.

I don't know the level of competence of your management team there but they need to wake up to the fact that one employee's poor performance CAN AND WILL eventually effect the company. To include driving out good people, leaving them with nothing but losers.

If she's not answering phones when it is clearly her duty/time to do so, then let them ring. Just make sure your manager knows that YOU are doing your duty when required. And by no means are you required to cover for her so she can goof off. Let your manager know when you take your breaks, are away for lunch, etc. and then let the chips fall where they may.

Orange County Ca's picture

Get a little pinhole video receiver and place it where it can record her personal calls and when you've got about an hours worth make it into a DVD and give it to your manager.

OR: change your mind set by shutting up and doing your job and quit worrying about what others are getting away with. She's screwing the manager and there is only one way to fight that and you don't want to go there.

jumanji's picture

I have a similar issue, except the coworker is actually my subordinate. The problem? She is also besties with the boss. Recently, boss asked that I share any concerns/complaints the staff had, and I made the mistake of repeating one that involved said coworker. Big mistake.

Now, I just disengage. I do my job, leave her to do whatever the boss gives her to do. Not my problem.