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OMG...WTF!

StepWTF's picture

I walked downstairs to go to the kitchen and saw SD13 telling my hus, "Now come here!" "Say you love me!" She then proceeded to grabbed him by his waist like he and I do one another. Being who I am, I stated loudly, "That is disgusting, that looks like what husband and wife or lovers do!" My hus come into the kitchen and tried to kiss me, I told him, "HELL NO!, THAT SHIT LOOKS INCESTUOUS!" I am so sick right now, the more I think about it, the more I think I am going to continue on my path for DIVORCE!!!!!!!"

Silent River's picture

Hard to swallow that crap. Feeling your pain. Mine have been adultised due to "parenting off guilt, which is ineffective parenting."

My SD will side with her dad, against me. The way they do that...I feel like a 15 YO being lectured by mom and dad for staying out past curfew. Pretty degrading...

Wish so bad I could attend the sisterhood of Stepmoms conference so I had some shoulders to cry on but it is held way too far away this time around. Maybe next year...if I can hang on...

Feeling bad for you...

StepWTF's picture

I appreciate your reply, I am sorry that you are going through hell too. I wish I could attend something like that. It would be refreshing to be around women who understand my situation. This min-wife and shitty teen attitude from SD13 is living hell. My hus is a Disney Dad as well and BM basically has not raised SD13. I was told by my hub's family that her mother has neglected her from an early age on. I met SD when she was at age 6 and she had a smart mouth and give me-give me attitude (spoiled & entitled) from day one. Since she has gotten older, she feels that it is appropriate to kiss and hug her father like a man and woman in an intimate relationship would do. I blew a fuse today and let both hub and SD13 know that is was gross and inappropriate and yes I said to them it looked incestuous.

IslandGal's picture

:sick: That is damned awful for you. No way in hell could I put up with that shit..ever!! Have you tried taking pics and plastering them all over facebook? Maybe try to shame them both into seeing how inappropriate their behaviour is? SD will not be welcome back at our home until she acts like the daughter she is, and not the wanna-be mini-wife. DH is 100% with me on this - if he wasn't, we'd be in big, big trouble.

Teas83's picture

Where and when is this conference? How do I get more information about it? Can anyone attend?

hippiegirl's picture

What exactly did your DH do when mini wife grabbed him like that? Did he let her know that it was NOT APPROPRIATE?

How did you refrain from choking that little bitch out?

step off already's picture

My dd14 would never ever behave that way with her father. She's a loving girl and had a warm relationship with her dad but that would not fly and if I, as the bm ever got wond of behavior like that, they'd both get a good talking too and I'd drag them in to a joint counseling session.

I could never in a million years imagine my dd13 behaving like that not her father playing in to it.

windee's picture

:jawdrop: just WOW!!!!!! :jawdrop: I cannot believe that happened!!!! I am so sorry!!

StepWTF's picture

He tried to come and talk to me and I told him that he had better explain to her what is appropriate behavior for daughter toward her father. The problem is this child is 13 going on 20. She feels that anything I do with her father she should be able to as well. She is in constant competition with me and it has gotten increasing worst since I completely disengaged from her. I explained to my hus that given how evil his ex-wife is he had better straighten this out because his ex-wife is the type to file a DSS case on him if she feels she can get away with it. I personally don't care much anymore what he or his daughter do. I have come to realize that things will not get better and I refuse to spend the rest of my life in the BS! I am working on getting my separate residence and filing for legal separation and finally divorce.

Some issues between a husband and wife can be resolved but when you have someone's child in your house creating havoc and your spouse refuses to parent, the only option is to leave.

IslandGal's picture

I completely understand you wanting to get out. If he hasn't woken up to her then he's feeding in to her ridiculous manipulative ways. This will only get worse.

Before I got into the step situation, there was a girl we went to school with. She's now in her 50's. Not sure if her Mom passed away, but her Father remained single for years. Now, they live together and they are both single. They come to functions and attend family gatherings together. Her Father is a lovely man, but no women would ever go near him. When I asked why, they said he was already married - to his daughter. She has all the say in any female that enters his life.

Daughter also went to Hawaii to meet some guy she was talking to online, thinking they could have a relationship. Turns out, he wasn't as generous to her as her Dad is, so she left him. She still lives with her dad today - and he is also still single. Neither of them are happy - both always cranky and miserable. It's just so sad and pathetic.

I can see your hubby heading in the same direction - unless he wakes up to himself. But look after YOU - leave and don't look back - this is a sick, weird relationship.

StepWTF's picture

Since that happened hus and I talked and I don't know what he said to her but either she overheard us talking or he talked to her because she has calmed down quickly and suddenly. I would not let my hus even so much as kiss me. I have been working all weekend and stayed in my office and bedroom (my no-skid zones) the entire weekend. I have been avoiding contact with her. I went to get something to drink and she was in the solarium at the door. When she heard me in the kitchen she said in her annoying voice, "Hey Mom!" I immediately told her, "Please do not call me that, call me Mrs. (my first name).""I really am not comfortable with you calling me that." I could tell by her response that she is well aware that she has pushed me too far and that she and I are done! In my hus's defense after talking with him, he did not like that she did that either but didn't want to push her away or make her feel rejected. I understand how he feels but I told him that sometimes you have to stop her and let her know that some behaviors are not acceptable. I also know that she knows I am done with her BS because she has gone from her shitty lil' mini-wife attitude to very humble even in her interactions with her father. It is sad that it has come to this but I have tried repeatedly to befriend her, talk to her one-on-one as well as with my hub present. I have tried to have open discussions, "family" meetings, giving her things she wanted and well as needed, spending my time and money. I have shown her genuine concern and compassion only to have it thrown back in my face and bite me in the ass. I am sooooo over her and her manipulative and lying ways. My hub has been trying hard to make a mends with me this weekend, he also knows that I have reached my breaking point. I don't care if his daughter shit rainbows and pixie dust, I am over this whole situation.