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Nurses or anyone who may know around what age can kids say no to Vaccinations?

Heathergreener12's picture

Ok what I mean is when you take a 3 or 4 year old to get Vaccinations the medical staff may help hold down a screaming kid for the shot. Now I can't imagine they would do the same for say a 13 or 14 yr old refusing to get a shot. So my question is around what age if the kid says no way to getting a vaccine regardless if the parents want it done the Pediatrician/nurses won't force the kid to get it done?

CrownJewels's picture

I believe in bodily autonomy. So, I believe a 13/14 year old can say no.

Why are you asking? Is the SS (?) refusing? 

Heathergreener12's picture

SS14 has his Annual physical coming up the end of June and both DH and BM want SS14 to get his Covid vaccine when it's available for his age group. SS14 is just refusing because he hates shots. He needed to get blood work done last fall and refused.  SS14 is standing his ground on saying no to the shot so it's VERY unlikely SS14 will Cooperate to get his Covid vaccine. So I was just wondering in this case what if anything would his Pediatrician do as far as Restraining SS in getting the vaccine 

CrownJewels's picture

Restraining a child to force a shot on him/her when he/she is afraid will lead to a more permanent phobia/trauma. Doing it to a teenager is even more inappropriate.

His Dad and the doctor/nurse should explain to him in a non judgemental way the pros/cons and that it is okay to say no but what the potential consequences are of saying no.

Also, they need to take his fear of shots seriously and not be condescending/mean/belittle/berate. Like address his fears and worries. Like a dentists' office that caters specifically to fearful kids and adults. They don't restrain anyone. They use calming drugs and a relaxing/fun space.

tog redux's picture

No one will force them or hold them down. But most schools require vaccinations of some types (not the covid one yet, but likely). So it's unlikely a kid will refuse forever unless they have an anti- vax parent willing to pave the way for them. 

Heathergreener12's picture

Both DH and BM want SS14 to get the Covid vaccine when available for his age group which should be in June sometime. SS14 is flat out refusing because he hates any kind of shots. It's VERY unlikely SS will change his mind so I was just wondering what if anything the Pediatrician would do

tog redux's picture

There is nothing the pediatrician can do. His parents can give him consequences for refusing or a reward for facing his fear of needles.  And it's likely his school will require it in the fall. 
 

If he's that anxious about needles he should probably have some therapy to deal with the phobia. 

CrownJewels's picture

Yuppppp!!! BM and his Dad need to not rugsweep their son's fear of needles or it will go full-blown phobia. If it hasn't already.

If they won't do therapy at least they could find a Nurse Practitioner or some other GOOD doctor or whathaveyou that has practical and kind ways of dealing with this common problem.

I don't believe in penalizing SS for saying no, though. The SS isn't refusing to be a brat. He's terrified.

tog redux's picture

I'm guessing they will be, in some places. If people want their kids back in school, they can get the vaccine. If not, they can stay home.

Sandybeaches's picture

I would doubt they would mandate something that doesn't have approval. That just spells trouble to me.

notarelative's picture

Here 14 is ninth grade and there are required vaccinations to attend. Covid is not currently one, but there are others required. If SS has not had all of them, which parent is prepared to homeschool him? 

 

simifan's picture

This is a state law thing. The age and minor medical procedures for each state varies. Given the approval of the Covid vaccine was predicated on allowing refusals, you would have a tougher time here. That being said, your SO needs parenting classes if he allows his child to refuse medical procedures, especially routine ones like blood work because he doesn't like needles. 

Winterglow's picture

I am horrified at the idea anyone would hold a child down to give them any kind of treatment! That is dreadful!

I have an 18yo special needs daughter who hates, but hates, blood draws and it takes a very competent person to talk her through it. Unfortunately, we have to do it at least once a year. On Friday, we went to get the Covid vaccine, just her and me. I was apprehensive about her reaction but was totally impressed by the staff at the vaccination centre! They offered to let her lie down if she wanted (she didn't), listen to music (she did), and she was in and out in a matter of seconds ... but maintained her grip on the nurse's phone (with her permission) for the music until it was time to leave :)  They made her feel completely comfortable and it was soooo much easier for all concerned. 

Sandybeaches's picture

I am also horrified and angry that anyone would force their child to have an experimental vaccine!! 

Suggesting that holding anyone down especially an older child to give a shot or anything else is abuse in my eyes.  Holding a baby still is one thing holding a child down is abuse!  I wouldn't even let the vet do that to my dog.  

tog redux's picture

I'm horrified and angry that people won't take the vaccine because they are, against all statistics, more worried about the vaccine than about COVID, leaving all of us stuck with COVID restrictions and placing those who can't get the vaccine for medical reasons at high risk.

No one will hold him down. But at 14, he doesn't get to make the choice based on misinformation or irrational anxiety.

Sandybeaches's picture

They going to make him then if he doesn't want it then?

It's also not for you to judge what is rational and what is not. If the end result is that you would like for him to change his mind, then talking out the fears would work much better. 

Serious side effects and death are not misinformation they have happened . Has it happened to everyone no however it has happened to a percentage of those that got vaccinations. That percentage are humans and no one knows for sure which people it is going to happen to. While you may look at it as a percent that percent is a human life. So therefore it would not be irrational to be afraid of getting a vaccination nor misinformation to say one could get serious side effects or die. Those are the facts.

Rags's picture

When it comes to health and medical.... minors don't get to refuse vaccinations if their parents insist that they are vaccinated.  IMHO

A minor kid does not have the maturity, brain development, or intelligence to make an informed decision on an adult topic. That is why they have parents.

My SS-28's half sister "refused" her last three reconstructive surgeries to construct her fingers and toes due to a birth defect she suffered due to fetal tobacco syndrome issues.  She pitched at fit at 10-12 and the moron adults in the SpermClan played the "she is old enough to decide" crap.

Now in her mid 20's she is angry that they did not have her complete her constructive surgery plan with the Shiner's Children's Hospitals.  She wants the plan completed now but.... now she has to pay for it herself.

So NO!  Minor children do not get a say. What kid would not say no to a shot if given a choice?  I hated shots. I was the kid that blew a gasket over getting a shot.  It was not until I was in my mid teens that a shot was not a drama fest for me and the med team.

Body autonomy medically speaking .... is not a thing for a minor IMHO.  Touch... absolutely, sexually, absolutely.  Medically... Nope. Kids do what they are told and if it takes a team to strap the kid down so they can get their injections.... bring on the guerilla shot squad!

My SKid flipped his lid over a shot one time when he was about 5yo.  He fought tooth and nail when he needed an antibiotic shot to deal with a chronic lung infection that had been going on for a couple of weeks.  The doc and nurses tried to talk him into it for more than an hour.  I finally had enough and told them to give him the shot already. It took myself, two nurses and the doctor to hold him down so they could stab him in the butt cheek.  He had his butt cheeks clinched so hard the nurse kept saying "I can't push medication into his muscles!" I told her to push as hard as it took.  Which she did and which hurt SS that much more.  When we left the exam room after WWE smackdown shot fest they tried to give him a lollipop.  Hell no.  We walked through the waiting room and every kid in there was screaming bloody murder his screams and howls had scared them so badly.  We got outside, I stood him on a planter for a face to face about how he was rediculous and was embarrassing and that would never happen again.  And it never did happen again. All it took going forward was to remind him of the first screaming wrestling match over a shot.  He would take his shots tearfully but calmly from then on out.

Sandybeaches's picture

Seriously Rags holy crap that story made me sick to my stomach.  There would have been a much better way to handle fear than that.  That medical staff ought to be ashamed of themselves and I don't think in most places today they would get away with that.  

To say it was for his own good making him more upset with a lung condition?  Horrifying!

Rags's picture

He was mortified by all of the attention he got from the waiting room when we walked out.  I felt horrible, but.... he needed the shot and it had to happen whether he wanted it or not.

 

Rags's picture

He was mortified by all of the attention he got from the waiting room when we walked out.  I felt horrible, but.... he needed the shot and it had to happen whether he wanted it or not.

 

Sandybeaches's picture

"He was mortified by all of the attention he got from the waiting room when we walked out. "

Mortified at 5??  I am not sure I can see that.  I don't think 5 year olds get mortified.  Still there was a much better way to handle it.  Never talking down to anyone at any age by telling them they are ridiculous and embarrassing.  Just curious I don't know your story but where were his parents? Why didn't they take him? 

I am thinking he could have had the lollypop.  Especially if you were feeling horrible as you say.

Rags's picture

Reward is for markedly positive behavior.

His dad was there.

This kid hates attention and always has.Even at 5yo he did not like to be the center of attention.  A waiting room full of terrified kids and scowling parents got his attention.

Rags's picture

Reward is for markedly positive behavior.

His dad was there.

This kid hates attention and always has.Even at 5yo he did not like to be the center of attention.  A waiting room full of terrified kids and scowling parents got his attention.

CrownJewels's picture

I do not agree. Being a child doesn't mean you have no rights to your own body, safety. I was making lifelong decisions when I was 12. 

A 15 year old definitely has the right to say no. Otherwise, you wind up with an adult who refuses to go to the dentist, doctor, go in an ambulance when he should.