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Niece nude pictures/ who should I confront? HELP!

windee's picture

So, somebody came up to me and told me that three different guys had sent them text messages that they saw a nude picture of my niece and another girl. I have not seen the pictures, I do not know if they are true but I feel like I need to say something just in case. Do I go pick up my niece and speak to her (she is 16) or do I go and speak to her father and mentioned to him that (without saying any names) somebody had told me all of this? I cannot let either one of them know who told me because I promised them I would not say their name but they wanted me to know. Torn

sunshinex's picture

Talk to your niece first. Dads overreact about stuff like this. It's by no means okay for her to send nude photos but she made a dumb, embarrassing mistake that can be learned from without drastic dad measures.

windee's picture

Thank you! I just wasn't sure if I should speak to her father because I've had a couple of other people tell me that she has a reputation already at school and with all of their teenage suicide going on I'm just afraid that if I don't say anything to her father people will start harassing her and all of that. That's why I was torn between talking to her or her father

IDontCare3117's picture

It's much worse than dumb or embarrassing. If she actually sent the photos she transmitted child porn. That can get her branded a sex offender by authorities.

windee's picture

You know, I never even thought of that! You are correct! Thank you! I can't believe I didn't even think of that!

IDontCare3117's picture

If it's true, she's posing for nude photos and she or someone else is passing them around. If she already has a "reputation" at school, this child is headed down wrong, dark path. It wouldn't surprise me if it's true.

You need to tell someone in authority - her dad, school guidance counselor, whoever. You giving her a talking to isn't going to do any good if what you were told pans out. She's already making a mess of her life, and needs more than an aunt to get straightened out. She would probably just deny everything to you anyway.

Who told you about these photos?

windee's picture

I want some proof (if there is any) and then I will have a chat with her father.? Thank you so much for your help!

IDontCare3117's picture

There's no way a dad can overreact to his minor daughter possibly doing something illegal that could land her in serious trouble with the law, and also shows how low her self-esteem must be. There isn't a reaction strong enough for that. This is a big deal.

still learning's picture

Talk to her father and hopefully he'll take away her phone and computer. Obviously your niece is not mature enough to have a phone with a camera, texting ability or internet connection. My 18 yr old son who graduated never had an iphone, just a regular ol' phone that he could call and text on. My 15 yr old does not have a cell phone yet. ill probably get him a flip phone with limited minutes when he's 16.

windee's picture

I spoke to my niece and will be speaking to her father as soon as I am able to have some time to talk to him. Thank you all of you for your help!!! I have to get to bed!! Whew! What a day!!

Thumper's picture

WHAT??? :jawdrop:

Ma'am the bio parents must be told right away. THEY are the parents and they will decide what to do next.

I FIRMLY disagree that you should go thru the back door and have a talk, chit chat, come to Jesus moment or what ever with with someone else's minor child.

This childs photos is now everywhere and to the guys that saw it,,,shame on them for not reporting. Child porn on their phones...hummm NOT OK.

REPORT to parents right away.

Solidshadow7's picture

When I was 15, my friend came to visit me at my moms house. She had a camera. While I was in the shower, she ran in and started taking pictures of me because she thought it was funny. In some of the pictures the background was blurry, making it impossible to tell where I actually was. I got out of the shower and started chasing her, trying to take the camera from her. While I was trying to take the camera from her, she continued taking pictures, so there pictures of me naked against a variety of different backgrounds and it was hard to tell where the photos had been taken.

I finally got the camera from her, ripped out the roll of film, exposed it, and dropped it in the trash. My friend was very angry at me, because she said pictures from her last party were on the roll as well, and now those were gone too.

Shortly after this, my mother filed for divorce against my stepfather and threw him out. My stepfather began calling me, and I didn't answer the phone. He contacted my mother several times, and kept insisting that I meet him in person, and alone. My mother was afraid he would kidnap me, and forbade me from speaking to him. She told my dad what was going on too, she was worried about my safety. A few weeks later, my stepfather showed up at my fathers house, (2 hours away) demanding to speak with me. My stepmother didn't allow him in, and demanded to know what it was about. He said that he had to speak to me in private, but my father came to the door and asked him to please leave the property. This is when my stepfather told them that he had photos of me participating in group sex and doing drugs. He wanted to discuss this with me before he used these photos to try to prove that my mom was an unfit parent in court. (He wanted full custody of his son with her, my half brother.) My father continued to ask him to leave, and as he was leaving my stepfather handed my father a large brown envelope, and said he could review the evidence himself about what my mother had me doing.

My father and stepmother came upstairs with the envelope and asked me if I had any idea about my stepfathers allegations or what was in it. Of course I didn't. I opened the envelope and pulled out a stack of pictures. I immediately recognized them as the naked pictures of me my friend had taken, and they were mixed with the rest of the pictures in her roll of film. I did expose the film, but I didn't realize that I had to expose the ENTIRE roll. My stepfather had taken the partially ruined roll out of the trash and developed what was left. The other pictures were of teenagers drinking and smoking in a darkened room at a party. The lighting just happened to match the lighting in my basement room at my moms, where my friend had photographed me in the shower. When you looked at all the photos together, it really did appear that I was being photographed naked in a room full of people doing drugs!

You don't always know the whole story.

windee's picture

That's why I wanted to speak to her first. I have heard too many stories of people getting jealous and lying about things and if people creating a situation for the drama. But if I see the pictures and it IS her I will let her know that either SHE will speak to her dad or I will. I was going to say something to him but I am going to wait until I can see something. The people that said something were not adults.