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Need advice.... When is it time to contact CPS

TexasBelle_80's picture

During spring break this year there apparently was an incident at BM house. DH and I had the skids with us and were on our way to bring them back to BMs when we got a call that BMs live in boyfriend had assaulted her and was being arrested could we keep them a few more days. We checked into it and found out BM had filed a restraining order against the boyfriend. We thought good. At least she got rid of him. Well two weeks ago we pick up skids for our half of the summer and they tell us boyfriend has moved back in. We went to the courthouse and got all the documentation on he assault. The police filed it as domestic violence, she had him arrested, filed the order then four days later had the order resolved. She said she "over reacted". Then, after looking into boyfriends criminal history more we find out this isn't his first domestic violence charge. And.... BM admits in police statement that she knows about it!!!! Boyfriend has beat up previous girlfriend and killed her dog. He's a scary guy.
Then we find out BM has moved to a 2 bedroom apartment. So she, the abusive boyfriend and all three kids are living in this tiny apartment. All the kids, girl 12, boy 5, girl 7 share one tiny bedroom. As if that's not enough, when they got back here SS 5 had a horrible rash on his bottom. I took him to the doctor and its excema from him not bathing. None of the kids could tell me the last time they brushed their teeth. And the oldest tells me shes afraid to be at BM home because of boyfriend.
My question is this enough to call CPS about or am I being trivial?

MommaOf4's picture

I would call, it is a major concern and they will certainly look into it a LOT deeper than you would be able to. You can remain anonymous to avoid any drama with the BM or kids... Rashes from not bathing and not brushing their teeth may only be just what you can see on the surface, its blatant neglect.

stepmomap's picture

CALL YESTERDAY! I have never had to call CPS but have had CPS called on me 3 times now. (all unsupported Smile Anyway, if the 5 yr old has a rash call, if the kids are in danger and you don't do anything about it they can be taken away from you also. Also the living arrangements are enough to have them taken away I would think. Call get it taken care of. Doesn't hurt to call and at least start a file...shows that you trying and that you do care.

kphotog's picture

You should have called yesterday. And keep copies of the documents that you already have for your records just incase.

As for the rash keep neosporin or whatever the doc gave you on it. Vasoline is good for excema too. When ss goes to bed I would let him sleep in a big tshirt and no underwear. We had an issue with ss7 getting bug bites on his butt then scratching them and it was about a week before we noticed anything, they weren't healing right because we were putting neosporin on it after his bath at night then underwear was on it all day and the bites weren't getting any oxygen. Since he's been sleeping with just a big tshirt it's healed a lot faster. Good luck with everything.

kphotog's picture

Btw before I catch Freud for not noticing. The kid is seven so he's capable of bathing and dressing himself so nothing was said until he complained about it.

zuzieq611's picture

If you were the custodial parents I may just not say anything and insist BM's boyfriend not be present when kids are there. If she is Custodial......you don't have a choice, a violent offender shouldn't be around children, you have to call. AND....ugh I don't say it lightly because BM has had CPS over here 3 times, we've had to undergo drug testing etc. Again, unfounded, but it is awful to be accused. Good Luck

jythia3's picture

Call now!!! If something happens to the kids or even to the BM you will have to live with it. You have to do everything you can to protect the kids. Good luck and stay strong.

jkl007's picture

CPS without a doubt. lots of luck to you!! it isnt' an easy road your going to go down. but your doing teh right thing and saving those kids also.

Tx mommy of 3's picture

Call and document everything. Take pics of the rash & date it. Keep a journal of everything that has happened so far with dates and details. If the kids mention things to you then add that to the journal too. Document when you call CPS and what they say. Even if they don't find anything this time, at least it will be noted in case you ever have to call again. If you ever have to take kids to the dr for rashes, signs of abuse or whatever, then take pictures and document what was wrong, what doc said and when it happened. Then if you have to go to court you'll have evidence.