My SO is depressed again... thanks to his Ex-wife and kids
Well here comes the Holidays and of course my SO is already depressed and so moody. No matter what I try to lift his spirits nothing works... I can't be his children and that is all he wants for Christmas is time spent with his kids... sad but true. Sadly it is me that has to deal with his emotional state of mind all because of the way his children treat him like crap. Every Holiday he gets like this because he is missing the hell out of his children!! He has not seen his son in 4 years!! His son is 24 and he disowned his father 4 years ago all because his mother is narcissist and she controls and manipulates all three children and fills their heads up with lies to turn the kids into hating their father! Now his oldest daughter that is 22 has not came out and said she has disowned her father but her actions tell him other wise she has nothing to do with her father... sure she will except his gifts but ignores his text message and phone calls and unless she is getting a gift... but for the most part she makes up excuses for not spending time with him. For the past 4 years these children have abused their Father... no Happy Fathers Day... No Happy Birthday no text message or phone calls not one gifts not one card NOTHING his two adult children have good paying jobs but they buy their father nothing. I always take the 12 year old shopping and I see to it she buys her father gifts from her. I do try to make some positive impact on this child... Sadly now his 12 year old is becoming a reflection of her siblings she is now treating her father just like they treat him like crap.. she lies to him... backs out on their palns to spend time together and ignores his text messages and phone calls... She did not text him Happy Birthday even after I texted her that morning reminding her of his Birthday!! My SO will text all three of his children Merry Christmas... Happy New Year and he will get no reply back... he will buy them all three gifts and he will get nothing in return no thank you's. Then the depression sets in... NOT FUN!
A few weeks ago my SO texted both of his daughters and he made plans with both girls he was going to take the girls out to eat and all three were going to go see the movie Frozen 2 and they both agreed to the day and time, He was so looking forward to this day! Well don't you know his ex-wife saw the text message on her daughters phone so she beat him to the punch she took both girls to see the movie together on purpose. YEP SHE DID THIS TO HURT HIM ON PURPOSE!! Years ago before their divorce my SO took his 2 girls to see the first Frozen movie together and this was a special memory for him and the the girls knew he was so looking forward to taking them to go see the second movie. When his 12 year old told him the news last week that her mom took them both to see the movie he went into tears right in front of her... she had zero empathy she is just like her mother!! She is only nice to her father when she wants something from him.. .Now ever since he heard this news he has been down and depressed and very moody. Not fun!
Then yesterday he reached out to both of his daughters wanting to set a day and time to get together to celebrate Christmas together for once. Of course his ex-wife is taking all three kids on a 2 week trip out of town or is she really? Who knows? She lies all the time...As usual his ex wife must hog their children all to herself she does this on purpose to hurt him! She is so selfish...
I know this man is grieving the loss of his 3 children... it has to hurt like hell I can't imagine. This I do know divorce causes grief and it hurts like hell!! But like I told him before... lets try and make sure we are on a trip every Holiday from here on out this way the kids can't hurt you! He needs to stop stepping into the mouse trap that causes him pain!! He needs to stop texting and stop buying these adult kids gifts... send them a card with a I love you... I miss you and I'd love to see ya and leave it at that! ENOUGH! STOP THE PAIN! Like I told him if I were him I would redirect my love... my time and my gifts to someone else... maybe a needy child that will love and appreciate him the way he deserves to be loved. He needs to put a stop to the abuse... take away the ammunition and there will be no more pain!