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My brother's custody situation .. Karma does exist!

SMof2Girls's picture

My brother's ex-wife had an affair years ago. He kicked her out of the house, divorced her, and she immediately moved in with this guy (also married to another woman at the time). They each finalize their divorces and the adulterers get married and have another kid.

Over the next 5 years, my brother and his exW go through some NASTY custody battles. Kid is being PAS'd hardcore by her BM, but kid knows what's up. Kid begs to live with my brother full time; mother refuses anything beyond the existing 50/50 custoy.

My brother remarries to a fantastic woman and has a second kid. My brother continues to fight in court for his existing kid .. creating drama/stress/headache for his new wife and kid. He can't seem to get ahead .. our court system very clearly favors moms.

Last week he gets a call from his exW .. she's in tears begging him to come help her .. she just found out her husband is having an affair. She has voluntarily handed over full custody to my brother, which my brother is having finalized with his attorney as we speak.

Nothing like a nice Karma trainwreck to brighten up the day }:)

SMof2Girls's picture

I'm so thrilled for him AND his daughter! It's all kind of sad too though .. when he told her that she'd be living with him full time her response was, "I knew it was only a matter of time before mom screwed up". This kid is 8 .. how much does it suck for her to feel that way about her own mom? She's WAY better off with my bro Smile

Kilgore SMom's picture

I'm very happy for your Brother and his daughter.
But I wonder what this BM is thinking. Because now she will be asked to pay child support? Or Did she sign her rights away? I think that was a stupid move on her part.
But at the end of the day its about whats right for the kids. And I'm sure at your brothers is where his daughter needs to be.

SMof2Girls's picture

I think even with very minimal visitation, she'd be required to pay little to no child support. She works part time right now. My brother carries all the insurance, day care costs, etc. and still pays her additional support on top of that.

I would also be willing to bet that if she agreed to hand over full custody that my brother promised not to ask for CS from her. It would likely be minimal anyway and he doesn't need it.

TASHA1983's picture

See that is the part that would burn my ass. I get that he may not want or need the CS but it is the principle of the matter in my opinion that matters here.

If this stupid, selfish bitch can just throw her kid away like that then she should be MADE to pay! Just like any man would have to do if he threw away his child and rights to his child. Even if they only rec'd 100.00 a month that money could go in an acct for SD for college or a car when she turns 16 or ANYTHING!

I despise my BF's kid so if BM EVER gave full custody to BF and I had to be stuck with that brat 24/7 then you bet your ass I will be making CERTAIN that bitch pays!!!

tryingmom's picture

I totally agree, its the principle of the matter. BM's who don't have custody should have to feel that pain of paying CS for her children just like the BD's do.

IF DH ever got custody of the skids, he has said that he wouldn't ask for CS, I always tell him, yes, you will, she needs to understand what its like.

SMof2Girls's picture

The alternative is that he refuses to waive her $50-$100/mo child support obligation. And BM will KEEP the kid instead of handing over the custody. So not only will my brother continue to pay $600+ per month, but his daughter will be dragged through countless homes and thrown in the middle of yet another nasty divorce.

Sure, he could file with courts to have custody modified for stability reasons, but that has done exactly ZERO good so far. His daughter has been in 4 schools in 3 years because BM couldn't keep a stable residence. He's been fighting/filing/appealing for 5 years .. and STILL can't get the courts to take his side; despite having lived in the same house (which he owns) for the past 10 years.

His kid is worth more than the principle of receiving child support from his ex-wife to him.

SMof2Girls's picture

My brother doesn't care about the money. Neither does his current wife. His daughter was/is living in a very toxic environment with her biomom. BOTH my brother and his current wife were on board to do whatever they could to get her out of it .. they've fighting in court for YEARS. Nothing they've done has made a damn lick of difference.

His daughter is a good kid. She's smart and sees right through her mom. She WANTS to come live with my brother and his wife. She's told his wife on numerous occassions that she wishes she were her real mom so she wouldn't have to leave anymore.

I understand the bitterness that comes to forking out money .. but my brother is really only concerned about having his daughter back home full time. The money doesn't matter to him.

silver ring's picture

Yes, Karma really exists. Time to pay back all the harassment she put her ex-husband through.