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Manner less idiots and the parents who raise them

K333's picture

I took my mother,dh,sd9 and myself out to eat last night. Sd9 was being OK. Then she decided to tell me about how much food I ate. Yeppers, sd9 who is 128lbs with 3 desserts judged me. Dh just pretended he did not hear,my mother was appalled, and he just sat there. I said we don't say things like that it's rude, especially since I am paying for this nice meal.
Dh still says nothing.
He texted me later thanking me for dinner. Probably hoping I forgot she insulted me. I told him it was disappointed that he sat and did nothing.
Then the excuses came. He dididn't hear, he talked to her later, why was I so harsh, and gee we were all talking about loosening our pants??
Told him no we weren't. My mom was there for the whole thing.
He kept denying it. Then I finally told him I'm done this has happened too many times. My family and I will not invite since she is 100 percent not responsible for what she says. And he is 100 percent responsible for letting it happen. He is now in the process of being butt hurt for little precious. fml.

Disneyfan's picture

Wait, you will no longer invite the child out for being rude (understandable), but her father who allows and excuses the rude behavior, will still be welcomed by you and your family. :? :?

K333's picture

She is 9 so she shares some of the blame too. But he is 100 percent at fault.i thought it went without saying he wouldn't be invited either.

CANYOUHELP's picture

Heavenlike is correct, kids or adults who speak inappropriately to others, were never taught how to speak to people, regardless of feelings. Typical social rules do not apply to them because parents were busy buddying them, rather than parenting them. Very sad for the the child who grows up into a dysfunctional adult with few friends, skills; they are self-centered and crude to anybody, as they so choose.

K333's picture

Oh no no! He can sit his happy a** at home. But i had to tell him why they wont be invited amymore. Have a pb&j. One has bad behavior and he does nothing.

CANYOUHELP's picture

As an adult, they will become even more rude, given he does nothing-- believe it or not. When they have years of uncorrected behavior they begin to think it is the norm and perfectly fine to make rude, crude comments to those they are insanely jealous, for whatever reason. The only way to deal with it, it to stay completely away from all this dysfunctional behavior. Your husband needs a reason to WANT to parent his daughter. You need to give him a reason now.

If he does nothing, which is what 75% of the men do, then protect yourself any way you need to to find peace in your own life; he is looking out only for his.

CANYOUHELP's picture

Good for you....

Just stay busy and know that YOU have decided to exclude yourself from this mess, they are no longer doing anything or controllng-- you. This thought is empowering--if you can keep it in your mind and heart.

Rags's picture

Yes/No Ma'am/Sir
Hold doors for laidies and elders.
Thank you/your welcome.

Be polite, don't be rude and insulting.

Manners and character are not that difficult and your DH is an abject parental failure for not enforcing reasonable behaviors of politeness and character in his spawn.

I would exclude DH from any future invites until he pulls his head out of his own ass and finds clarity on the abhorrant behavior of his spawn.

Now_Voyager's picture

I agree with the others who say it is all on DH. A nine year old is a product of her parent's approach to parenting, or lack of, in this case. Especially as you are the one being insulted!! How dare he sit there and say nothing. Look at it this way, your Mom is upset because she knows that you do not deserve that type of treatment and is angry on your behalf. Good for you for also being angry. Stick to your guns until he starts to parent his kid. Treat yourself as your Mom treats you, with love, respect and value.