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mail for BM

Calypso1977's picture

On occasion we get junk mail addressed to bm and it drives me nuts. Today we got one addressed to fiance and bm theirlastname. No idea why! How could random junk lists get her name associated with our address? I never receive mail with my ex husbands name on it. Wierd. Do you think she signed up for junk offers with our address just to F with us?

kontan's picture

Same thing happens here and it drives me nuts. WTH? I never get junk for my ex. I do receive medical bills for our children that are addressed to him, but they are on his insurance so it just makes sense. It makes me sick every time it happens. Great satisfaction in putting it through the shredder. I want to forward it with "Bitch doesn't live here!" written on it.

JacksGal's picture

I write on it "return to sender, addressee unknown at this address" and put it back in the mailbox. It's pretty much stopped now.

jumanji's picture

I get mail for my ex now and again - he's never lived in this town, let alone this house. I make a judgment call - if it's obvious junk, I trash it. If it might be legit mail, I put it in an envelope and send it to him.

Note - we've been divorced > 15 years.

B22S22's picture

The names are linked in a database. If you go to some of those people finder websites you'll see your BM's name with "relateds" listed, and one will probably be your DH. So wherever he is, he may get her mail or even phone calls.

We went thru a rash of getting phone calls for her -- she's never lived at this address. Most of them were obviously bill collectors. My DH made a comment to BM's DH about getting lots of phone calls for her... BM's DH said he's not surprised, she unplugs their home phone so it won't constantly ring. :? Gee, thanks BM...

I acted all innocent a couple of times and gave them her forwarding address and cell phone number. Hey... they asked if I knew her and where she could be contacted. If questioned, I'll just say I thought maybe it was the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes people looking to bring her the roses and giant check...

ncgal1980's picture

I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets pissed when this happens! We get mail for BM several times a week. I don't even look at it anymore - it all gets tossed in the trash if I'm the one sorting the mail. DH gives it to her when he sees it. Screw that. If she can't change her damn address, that's not my problem. Off it goes into the circular file.

It still pisses me off to come home to MY house, check MY mailbox, and have to see HER mail. UGH!

kontan's picture

I want to use her address and phone number for every junk list I can find, making sure some are risque too!

ncgal1980's picture

If BM can't get her shit together and change her address, I'm going to do that!

I don't even care if it's time-sensitive, important mail. If *I* have to get it out of the mailbox, it ALL goes in the damn trash!

She even still has the skids' Medicaid cards sent to our house. Apparently she hasn't informed DSS yet that she's not living there anymore. I'm sure there's some reason for that, relating to her welfare benefits. I came home a couple weeks ago, checked the mail, and yep, there the Medicaid cards were. I know I'm an ass, but guess where those cards ended up? Not in BM's hands, that's for damn sure! If she doesn't like it, she can get off her dead ass and FIX IT!

(Don't worry - the skids won't go without any healthcare. She's had to request duplicate cards in the past numerous times because she lost them (she can't keep up with ANYTHING), so she's very familiar with the procedure.)

She hasn't lived in DH's house (and now it's MY house, too) in almost two years. She's had plenty of time to deal with this.

sbm014's picture

We do not get mail but DH and MIL (has on of BM's old phone numbers she had to request DH to change it I think once and then after he left she changed it) get calls about collections I'm sure they love them because they provide new address, number, her moms number, anything they can provide. '

If we ever got mail for BM I would probably destroy it and go file my own change of address for her. I don't think I could deal with it showing up all the time.

ncgal1980's picture

I know sometimes you get junk mail addressed to people who lived there months, even years, earlier, so okay - I get it. Your information stays on databases for a long time sometimes.

At my old house, I lived there for five years, and the entire time I kept getting junk mail for the guy who owned it previously. So I understand that, but "regular" mail? Good Lord, there's no excuse for that. It takes all of five minutes to fill out a change of address form and turn it in. BM just "can't find the time" to do it. She never has time to do anything to hear her talk. She's just "too busy." Busy doing what, I don't know. She doesn't work. She was taking some classes at the local community college, but DH told me earlier this week that she's dropped out. I don't know why, but I'm not the least bit surprised.

So yeah, if she can't find the time to change her address, then I can't find the time to give a shit about making sure she gets her mail.

SanAntonioSoccerMom's picture

This happened to us also, up to 7-8 years AFTER my husband's divorce. We were getting bills, unpaid collection notices, her "student loan" paperwork, etc. I filed an IG complaint with USPS, got a case number, and never had a problem again. I found it sooooo annoying especially since we had moved probably 6 times and one time overseas and the mail still came to our addresses. What the heck?

Binkini2002's picture

After my ex-husband and I broke up and he moved out, I'd still receive mail for him and it drove me nuts. I'd write on the envelopes "not at this address" and I was nice enough to include his new address. That really helped. More recently (7-8yrs after he left) I received a collections letter for a Teeter Hang-Ups saying a payment or balance was delinquent. I didn't feel like going to the post office to forward this letter so I took a pic of the letter and texted him it. He laughed it off saying someone stole his credit card. He as usual didn't take care of it and I kept getting these letters. I ended up calling the number and gave them his current address. Biggrin