Is it possible that he knows just how crazy she is and that she will make him pay, even if she can't stand him? It doesn't take much to set off the Crazies. I think they look for ANY reason to mess with their ex's and their (BM's) replacement. It may be that he simply wants to avoid kick starting her rage. Just a thought. Only you really know how he feels about her.

I started really laying it on...you know...licking his earlobe whilst I whispered sweet nothings into his ear....
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You did this in court!!!??

He probably just had a hard day and didn't want to fire the ex up anymore. I wouldnt't read to much into it in the courtroom situation. I remember years ago when going through my divorce in th Melb Family Law Court everyone seemed to be sorting things out with lawyers in the corridors and whenever the ex came along with the new love of their life it always got the old partner fired up. Caused a lot more trouble than it was worth I thought. Now if he carries that through to no kissing, touching, holding hands etc., whenver his kids are around then that's a different thing entirely. I let the court thing settle down and then see what happens. I think it'll be okay.

My PDA's with DH are limited to hand holding. Arm around each other and quick kisses. NOTHING sexual. That is reserved for the bedroom in private.

Not only would I not do what you did in front of BM, I would not do it in front of anyone.

I wouldn't feel the need to show my affection around her especially in a court room setting. lol

Not sure court is the time and place for PDA

Very good points being made. Maybe, he wasn't uncomfortable because he was concerned about her reaction at all. Maybe, it was because he was in a court room and he knows a judge is watching while coming to a decision.

DH & I hold hands, hug & exchange quick kisses in public, be it in front of BM, his kids, our friends...it doesn't matter.

However, licking earlobes is something we save for ourselves.

You mentioned you could tell he wasn't happy with your amorous love touches, yet it was when you realized that that you layed in with licking his ears???

In my opinion, if he's uncomfortable with it, you don't do it. Why would you???

Waiting room or court room, you're inside a courthouse. Even as a stranger, I wouldn't want to see that.

My guess is that it has NOthing to do with BM's presence & EVERYthing to do with the fact that it's completely inappropriate...like you're trying to mark your territory or something.

She should have just peed on him.

As I read this my 3rd grade teacher Sister Angelina came to mind. If we got out of line, she would make us write lines.

THERE'S A TIME AND PLACE FOR EVERYTHING.

A courthouse isn't the place for PDA.

And FYI----If you noticed that SO was totally uncomfortable, I would bet money that the BM also noticed and is laughing her ass off about it. I would not do that again, anywhere. It makes you look desperate.

Okay well it is a venting site and I think a lot of our initial posts start of as a good bitch which we sanitize and call a vent I agree with everyone else as far as the courtroom being inappropriate, and yes you probably were being bit smuck and showing the ex you won kinda thing (not meant to be nasty we're all human), but as the others have basically said pushing her buttons anywhere is not in anyone's best intrests including yours, and the courtroom well.........Outta bounds chicken. Sorry you have had a bad two weeks. Hope things pick up now the court drama is over.

Ah liks....live and learn. Don't beat yourself up about it.

I think the place you really want to get to is where you "don't care". You don't care what BM thinks of you. You want to get to a place where you don't even THINK about her.

Just by THINKING about her, she's taking up valuable space in your brain.

It takes practice.

Then you'll get to a place where it WON'T EVEN OCCUR to kiss DH in public in front of her. You'll live life, not to get a reaction from anyone, but just to live life.

That's my goal anyway. To disengage from the BM.

Affection and showing how strong your relationship is with your DH is probably one of the best ways to get the X to run for a dark corner just like a cockroach does when a light is turned on in a dark room.

However, there is a time and a place for overt affectio and a court house, even in the waiting area, is not the place.

Rather than climbing his leg and licking his lobes in the court house a mature and supportive holding of his hand or putting your hand on his leg would be far better and not make you look quite so trivial and desparate to show your connection with your DH.

When in court err on the side of class.