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Kids are super-destructive; I need advice

Anon21's picture

I'm sorry if this is the wrong sub-section, but I just do not know where else to go.
I'm 21, and my Girlfriend is 31. She has three kids, each from different Fathers.
I'm considering leaving. Just leaving this nightmare.

Oldest Son is 12.
Youngest Son is 7
Daughter is 8.

We've been together for almost a year. The Girlfriend and I have began fighting alot. My job was outsourced to Mexico last October, and I was forced to enter the Oilfield.

Well.. The Oilfield declined. I was laid off. I had been Homeless and working / sending money back, so I Greyhounded Home. I have a check for $12,000 coming in for me as my Father passed away and this is the dividend I have been selected to inherit.

We're living with her Mother, but I pay all the bills. Her Mother hates me, and speaks behind my back to the entire town, speaking about how 'abusive' I am. Her Mother is a narcissist, and I do my best to avoid her.
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I do all the chores, I work, and I pay the bills. My Girlfriend is super lazy. The kids are super-destructive and not behaved at all.
The kids have destroyed everything I own. I mean /everything/ except the laptop, which I keep on me everywhere I go.

Our Son, 7, recently took my wallet, and my oldest, 12, pulled a picture out of the wallet and cut it up with scizzors. The picture was my deceased ex-GF, and my best friend growing up. The picture meant so much to me, it was the last item I had of her. The kids destroyed the necklace she had given me, and everything else I had to remind me of her. I feel like destroying her picture was the straw that broke the camels back.

When I told him how much the picture meant to me, that destroying other peoples possessions isn't the way to go about resolving frustration I was told , ''I don't want to hear about the stupid picture.''

My ID, DL, SS Card are all gone. The Kids destroyed my birth certificate last month. I can't get a better job, drive, or do anything because all my documents have been destroyed my the kids.

My Girlfriend told me she was, 'sorry.'

I feel like 'sorry.' doesn't even cut it anymore. Maybe I'm not cut out for this Father stuff. I love her kids, I love her, and I want us to be a family. My Girlfriends Mother tells the kids horrible things about me, calls me names infront of them, and the kids have been repeating alot of what Grandmother says. She's a horrible, horrible woman. My Girlfriends Mother calls me names every day, almost every night. Horrible, Horrible names. I have never had this from anybody. Her Mother tells the kids that I'm a 'slob', that I'm 'stupid', 'can't hold a job', etc. I'm just so sick of all of this.

I'm ready to just throw it all down and leave. I'm so sick of all of this. I'm my Girlfriends only means of financial support, and that is what scares me. I don't want to leave them in a bind.

I have $12,000 coming in from an inheritance from my deceased Father. Should I just leave? Should I stick it out and see if it gets better?

I don't know who to ask for advice. I don't have any family.

hereiam's picture

Nothing about this sounds like a life a 21 year old, or anyone for that matter, should be living. You are being used.

Go live your life.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Agreed

Disneyfan's picture

GrandMA may be trying to run you off before her nasty daughterm messes around and pops out kid number 4. The poor woman is probably sick and tired of her trifling daughter having kids then looking to her for help when the relationships end.

Grandma isn't stupid. She knows darn you are going to be in the wind just as soon as you open your eyes and realize that her daughter is a lazy ass user. She's just playing beat the clock with her daughter. You WILL leave sooner or later. She just needs it to happen before the nut gets knocked up again.

twoviewpoints's picture

Oh for Pete's sake. All these problems for and with a woman you have only known a year. You're 21yrs old. Run out the front door now. Right this minute and don't look back.

Go to the post office, set up a Po box in your name and fill out an address change card. You don't want this woman or her mother to get ahold of your inheritance check. Get a certified copy of your birth certificate, a replacement social security card, a new drivers license and a job.

Then spend some time getting your head on straight to ensure you never again repeat the same mistakes you've made this past year nor or ever again tempted into such a situation again. All this or... don't give up your day job just yet. Your creative writing earnings won't be enough to support you.

Rags's picture

Re-read your post and then tell us what you should do.

But ... to speed things up. Leave, now, before your inherritance gets thrown down this dark smelly cess pool just like the rest of your hard earned income has been wasted on these toxic people.

Trust me, you do not want to make a life with a woman who allows her toxic spawn to behave as these crotch nuggets have towards you. 3 spawn by three different men? Really. Do you want to be baby daddy #4?

Leave, use your inherritance to re-establish yourself in a better place. Replace your documents. All it takes is a phone call or an email and to pay some small fees.

By leave I do not mean down the street. Get far, far away from this shallow and polluted gene pool. It began with your GF's mother, your GF is worse, and her three out of wedlock crotch droppings are even worse.

Take care of yourself and do not have a second thought or inkling of guilt about leaving these toxic assholes to rot in the cesspool of their own making.

GO NOW!!!!!

Anon21's picture

You're right. You are all absolutely right. I'm going to leave, I don't know what I was thinking by trying to justify myself with staying.

I have my own P.O BOX, so once the check arrives I'll have it. I'll also begin getting my documents back.

How do I go about leaving? Just tell her I'm leaving? Just leave? How would I go about it?

Disneyfan's picture

Just leave. Believe me, with her track record she knows the drill.

If youu decide to be nice and give her a heads up, DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HER AFTER YOU TELL HER YOU'RD LEAVING(hell, stop having sex with her now).Even if you wear 3 condoms and pull out each time, she might still get knocked up.

hereiam's picture

^^^This. And if you do give her a heads up, do not fall for her tears or bullshit sob stories and promises that things will change.

Rags's picture

Just leave and tell her as you walk out the door. If it is a surprise to her, she is a delusional idiot.