It has been a month
It's been just over a month since the disaster at New Year's when SS14 and his friend was highly inappropriate with my 7 year old. My husband took him to his mother's and i supposed i expected the boy to stay there. Nope. BM contacted DH parents and they took him in. I found out about a week later when DH mom and dad came over to get clothes. I was confused when they showed up with SS14 and hurried my son out the back door to my neighbor's house. SS walked in with a big ole grin on his face. While he was looking for clothes in his mess of a room, I felt berated by the inlaws as they made comments of having to change their lives around for this. I had had enough! i finally unloaded. I told them the nonscense of the last 10 years. Of how SS for YEARS told me each and every time he came home from BM's or their house how he doesn't have to listen to me. I told them of all the bad behavior and how I need to protect my child from his sexual deviancy.
They clutched their pearls and let me know that they would never tell ss14 anything like that! Boy was FIL pissed! I should have called them... I could have done that....they would have done this....Here is the thing...I married my husband and not them. My husband is the parent and I am not. They just reiterated how they have to protect ss14 from me (because i am mean and i yell-insert eyeroll), and i reiterated how i have to protect ds7 from ss sexual deviancy. I refuse to let anything else more happen to ds.
During the last month...ss14 has been staying up late (I still get the Microsoft XBox reports) , taking days off weekly from school (usually Thursdays), and failing 4 subjects in school. The semester just started but he has refused a few projects, and completely flunked tests. He has been caught on his phone in class and playing games on his computer in class. So this last 2 weeks, the in laws have decided that although they offered to keep and raise ss...they now cannot take him to school or get him from school...DH now gets him in the am and drops him in the evening...BM still gets him EOWE...but she cant deal with him full time yet from what I understand. IDK i ask few questions because none of the answers really make sense. The in laws are pissed because ds7 is not allowed over there if ss14 is there. But on the weekends when ss14 is gone they make zero effort to see ds. DH came home last night annoyed that he has to get up early and fight with ss14 to take him to school and drop him off in the evenings. (DH is lazy and while the inlaws home is a 15 min drive he will spend at least an hour gone). He made a comment about "if boys and girls would act right" he wouldnt be in this predicament. He just couldnt understand why I took that comment personally.
On the positive...since the inlaws are going out of town this coming weekend, DH is going to stay there with ss14. Ive decided that I am going to have a girls night out. I am snagging my sister and my daughter and her friend and we are going to have a tequila night out. I am quite excited. I havent had a night out in over 10 years with anyone. We couldnt ever make plans and when we did...they always got canceled due to ss, bm, or the in laws. I am done with that. I used to be this quick witted extrovert that never met a stranger....i am now a shy introvert that wants to hide. no more.