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It doesn´t get better with age!

Ratilal2016's picture

One of my best friends that was also with a single dad (two daughters of 9 and 11) since August and ended in February (because of the exact same reasons we read here everyday) was showing me yesterday matches on Tinder and she goes "This one has a daughter, but she´s already 18 so it´s cool" And I after spending so many hours reading Steptalk told her "It doesn´t get better with age! just worse, I read this forum and you should read it too!"

She ignored me and started showing me the guy instagram......and it was unbelievable.....only pictures of him and his daughter as if they were a couple, pictures of only his daughter like she was a model and poems to her...completely disgusting.....well she was warned!

 

Robyn-H's picture

I would advise anyone against getting into a relationship with anyone who has kids, regardless of the dynamics involved. But that sounds borderline incestuous (emotionally, at least)! Poems? Really!??? If my biological dad started writing me poems I'd feel awkward as heck! Bad

AlmostGone83's picture

I would advise against it too. Even with the best skids and BMs it's still not worth it.

ETA: there needs to be a mandatory "you've been warned" class for people trying to marry someone who already has kids.

readingandlearning's picture

Marrying someone who already has children just isn't worth it. I would advise against it even in the best situations. These situations are all rainbows and butterflies at first. Give it a few years and it becomes stephell. You will be just used and rarely treated with respect.

CLove's picture

Did you tell your friend about mini-wife syndrom? And she still wants this guy? Is she that desperate? Is she that unable to be single????

And yes, I wish Toxic Trll BM would trap a dude with toxic kiddos, and have to do battle with a toxic teenage step daughter (she already has SD21 Feral Forger...so she has lots of practice!)

Ratilal2016's picture

She says a lot that I´m being crazy and that a daughter with 18 has already her own life...I think she is not aware of all the mess being raise by a guilty dad brings and the co dependancy ......that is so loud and clear in that crazy instagram page!

hereiam's picture

How can she think that all of the instagram photos and poems are normal, and not weird and creepy?

Ratilal2016's picture

I think she isn´t aware like I wasn´t....at first I thought my ex was such a good father and that was so honourable and a sign of character (lol) I even have friends that say "come on all fathers run away from the responsability you had to find the only one that really wants to be a father"

But this weird type of behaviour of Disney Dad, mini-wife and emotional incest has nothing to do with wanting to be a good father to his own child. I suffered a lot before finding steptalk because I thought something was wrong with me for feeling jealous, neglected and sad all the time, just after reading many posts here I started to wake up and see the mess I was in.

The ex BF of my friend had no time for here and she thinks it was because they were little and with a 18 year old she won´t have that problem. She is not seeing the BIG (omg so BIG) picture (mess this type of single dads are).

still learning's picture

Everything will be fine with your friend as long as she goes along with the guy and his daughter's current program.  The minute she starts to assert herself as the love interest in daddee's life she'll have hell to pay. Imagine the horror if he wrote a poem for his gf rather than daughter, oh the jealousy!  He'll probably keep his relationship with her on the down low while still posting about he and his daughter-wife.