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I need some very practical ideas on how to disengage completely from my toxic SS 10

CJ38's picture

Hi,

I need some very practical ways of how to disengage from my very toxic, lying and manipulative SS who is 10.

hismineandours's picture

Alcohol.

Alone's picture

Stop asking him questions and try not to react to the things/stories he makes up. Much easier said than done. I am still working on this myself. When others talk to him in front of you, take that moment to suddenly need the bathroom or to check the laundry or anything you can think of to remove yourself from the room they are in so you do not have to hear the crap that he says. When he tries to talk to you, stay busy doing something so that most of what he says does not have your full ear. It will not stop his lies or games, but it will help you get through the bs a little better.

BTW Valerian Root is a wonderful herb for nerves for me, it just takes the edge off so that I do not explode after SS16 says two words... takes about 6 words lol.

3familiesIn1's picture

Your reply to most things that aren't a danger to him are:

Mmm not sure, ask your dad.
I don't know, you should ask your dad.
Did you ask your dad?
Maybe you should wait for your dad to do that?

janeyc's picture

First of all to do it properly you need to get yourself into a state of calmness, tell yourself "I will not let ss effect me in any way at any time", he needs to see that he cannot bother you in anyway, just be calm with him, be civil at all times and if he asks you to get something for him, say could you ask your Father please, if you feel yourself losing your cool then take a long bathroom break, or go to the shop for something, if you go to your room they will know something is up, once ss sees that he cannot bother you, he may well stop trying, no doubt he will get himself into trouble and he will try to bother you all the more at first. Good luck and stay calm, remember hes just an annoying child and you have all the required tools to disengage successfully, you may feel more stress at first, but the work will be worth it in the end.