I left my DH, twin SDs & SS today. I just can't take it anymore!
Hi Folks! I'm so happy to find this site. Today, after 9 years, I left my DH, twin 12 yr old SDs & 11 yr old SS. We've had 100% custody for 2 1/2yrs. We went to pick them up for summer break in June 2013 & on the drive back it was revealed that their older 1/2 brother had been sexually assaulting twins for a year (they were 9), along w sharing the girls w his friends.
They were all immediately placed in intensive counseling, which continues now.
my DH is 45, & I am 55. I have 3 adult children & 8 grandchildren. My grands are the same ages as stepkids.
I left so that I can take a few days to decide whether I want to continue this miserable life w this family.
I've been miserable for so long!I love my DH so much, however, these girls are incredibly difficult. I understand that they were traumatized & have serious issues. They are still getting help. One of the twins (Betty)treats me horribly: lies, rolls eyes, extremely disrespectful, failing every class, refuses to do her chores correctly, manipulates her Father daily. She is cruel to my grandkids every time they come to visit me (which became rarely). Both girls continue to open new online accounts to chat w boys & even grown men...never girls. They flirt w these men, post pics licking their lips, YouTube twerking videos - you name it! The other twin (Amy) is dangerously sneaky. We are so afraid for their safety, but they don't seem to care.
I left because these kids are destroying my house, my husband refuses to step up to help me (won't check their chores every night at 8, won't help w schoolwork, won't make sure his niece (23, lives w us to "help" w kids) actually does anything to help. He blocks me from disciplining the kids - has separate meetings w them to get their story, is inconsistent at best at being a disciplinarian, & has started sighing & rolling his eyes at me when I bring this to his attention.
I have been disabled for 15yrs. The stress of living w them has taken a huge toll on my health. I'm a diabetic, have a degenerative spine, MS, & am in pain every day. I've been losing weight, my hair & almost my sanity.
I feel a sense of freedom, breathing fresh air & happiness here at my child's home w my grands. I also feel so very guilty for putting my well being first & bailing on my DH who I upset w them & unhappy as well.
Sorry this is such a long vent. I desperately need advice. I don't know if I want to stop this relationship or continue the fight. The thought of living w these kids another 10 years is literally sickening to me. I see no hope for a better tomorrow. It just seems to get worse...