When DH and I first met, SD was just a small toddler. I thought she was a very sweet kid. When we moved in together she was 2. I was very attached to SD in the beginning. Her mom was barely in the picture. She was very dysfunctional and my DH had SD with him the majority of the time. Somewhere down the line, mommy decided to try to make up for that. My opinion is that once she found a new boyfriend/baby daddy that could sit at home all day instead of have a real 9-5 job, THEN she could be bothered with taking her kid half the time. Because then she wasn't on her own taking care of her. So, she started taking her half the time. It has been 50/50 for a long time now. Things spiraled out of control once this started.

The brainwashing from BM, and all of the confusion from the schedule constantly changing has turned SD into a bratty and manipulative kid. She has a horrible attitude when she's here with us. From the time she arrives at daddy's house, the drama starts.

I hear "daaaaaadddyyyyy" about 100 times a day when he's home. She hangs off of him all day long like an animal. When he isn't around, she doesn't pull the same crap with me. She knows that I mean business and I'm not going to tolerate baby talk or a bad attitude. I don't ever yell at her or dole out punishments that are unfair. My motto is, if you're gonna be a brat go ahead and be one but do it somewhere else. You aren't going to be around me with that attitude, because I'd like to enjoy my day. And if you're going to have that attitude, don't ask me for anything. Her dad has gotten a lot better about this too, and I feel for him. He sees how bad her behavior has gotten and really wants to see improvement.

The snide comments towards me, however, make me want to rip my hair out. She loves to remind me that her mommy was married to her daddy FIRST. That daddy has to give her mommy money (isn't that special... I heard this yesterday and wanted to vomit). That being at mommy's house is better than being here. And on, and on, and on. She used to cry for her mom anytime something didn't go her way. An obvious manipulation tool. Her dad put a stop to that real fast.

I'm about to have a baby. I'm starting to get really pregnant and really uncomfortable. I am dreading having to deal with SD after this baby is born. I don't want her around when my family flies out here to see the baby after not seeing them for months (they live far away from us). Her bad attitude is going to make things difficult.

I look forward to dropping her off at school knowing she'll be returning to her mom's for the week. I dread picking her up the next week. I honestly can say that I do not love this child. I'm pretty sure I did at one time, and this change in her has really damaged the relationship. I feel SO guilty about this and I'm having a hard time dealing with it. I want it to get better.

Oh, and then there's the way SD smells when I pick her up to keep her for the week. She smells like a bong. I cannot get the smell of weed out of that kid's clothes no matter how many times I wash them, soak them and hang them outside! It's disgusting that they would send her anywhere smelling like that. Her clothes from her mom's get taken off, washed, and sealed in a plastic bag.