I am just so sick of BM's act
In the spirit of venting, I've made a short list. It just all builds up; some of it is so stupid (I know that), but it's just one thing after another after another ...
I'm so tired of her:
1. Claiming to be a victim.
2. Acting like she is some sort of saint.
3. Denying any contribution to the failure of her marriage (which ended when she cheated on DH a SECOND time - he forgave the first one).
4. Mother of the year act
5. Claiming every issue she has with me or DH is about the skids somehow.
6. Confusing her wants/desires with the best interest of the skids (they are OFTEN mutually exclusive)
7. Blazing fake red hair
8. Claiming to be Irish (no, she's not .. and fake red hair doesn't make her Irish)
9. Long fake nails
10. 10 layers of make up
11. Accusatory tone with EVERYTHING in EVERY COMMUNICATION
12. Insisting on trying to meet up with me to discuss her "parenting expectations"
13. Making the skids feel bad for wanting to see their dad
14. Making the skids feel guilty for having a good time with DH and I
15. Controlling, obsessive, and psychotic personality
16. Pretending like she's even been an active part of the skids lives up to this point
17. Treating DH like he is a completely incapable parent, but forgetting that every time in the past 6 years when the Navy has deployed her for up to 12 months at a time, HE was the one home raising their 2 kids ALONE
Sound familiar to any of you? lol
I don't know what's worse to
I don't know what's worse to tell you the truth. Having a BM who is alive or not. My SKID's mother died 3 years ago, so we have the kids FULL-TIME. Neither of us have family that is close by. The SKID's MGM (maternal grandmother) lives about 10 miles away, but she is very old and it's getting harder and harder for her to keep the kids. Especially now since she has stopped driving.
I feel your pain. Sometimes, I wish that BM was in the picture, then I read so many posts and makes me thankful that she's not.
Having lost my parents at a
Having lost my parents at a young age, I would never in a million years wish that on these girls. I just wish BM would grow up already. Act like a real mother. Act like she ACTUALLY cares about whether these girls turn out to be decent adults, not just whether or not she's the favorite parent.
I have a ton of family around and DH has some. If something were to happen to BM, we'd be more than equipped to take on the kids full time. But I don't want to take them away from their mom; I just want her to be a mother.
Through all of the venting, I
Through all of the venting, I am very grateful that the skids are actually decent kids (no thanks to BM). I'm not sure how I would manage dealing with this BM AND skids who hate me.
I don't remember writing this
I don't remember writing this blog... but I certainly could have written 1-6 verbatum. It is SPOT ON what I deal with.
She has explicitly said to DH
She has explicitly said to DH "I don't want to sound like the bitter ex-wife, but I feel like you chose to be with another woman and if that means you lose your kids, than so be it."
First of all, how does that NOT sound like a bitter ex-wife. Second, THEY WERE ALREADY DIVORCED WHEN WE MET.
Third, it's my opinion that he chose to leave a BAD marriage. Yes, that has an impact on his kids. But in the long run, I think it's BETTER for them. Kids learn relationships from their parents, and the last lesson he wanted to teach them was that it's acceptable to stay in a relationship where your partner continues to cheat, lie, and manipulate to them and their kids.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Kids learn
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Kids learn relationships from their parents, and the last lesson he wanted to teach them was that it's acceptable to stay in a relationship where your partner continues to cheat, lie, and manipulate to them and their kids.
I AGREE 1000000%. I have always said that. It is our responsibility to show kids what relationships are supposed to be like. ALL relationships. That is why they NEVER hear me talk bad about anyone. If I am angry with my mom, they don't know. My dad... they don't know. My MIL, they have no clue. They see us help our family, love them and respect them. They see how a husband should treat their wife, and how a wife should treat their husband. I don't want them growing up thinking it is "normal" or "ok" to fight with your spouse every day.
*high 5* I agree with
*high 5*
I agree with everything you said.
*sigh*
Now why can't their mother see that?
lol
lol
Sometimes I spew BS... LOL. I
Sometimes I spew BS... LOL. I knew what you meant though
Yep and yep--their marriage
Yep and yep--their marriage was dead, she treated DH like dirt, almost killed him with stress (BM allowed teens to run wild and countered parenting by DH), but when he moved on then it was "YOU LEFT US." I think she enjoyed the drama of a "woman wronged" and I know it influenced the kids. SD was in on the bitch sessions with BM and witch BF -- she actually called and left me a message "homewrecker." Isn't it fun?