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how do you handle feeding/meals when ss is obese and my kids are skinny?

dledden's picture

My 9 yr old is skin and bones, and will truly not eat anything that isn't processed junkfood. sometimes he'll eat my chicken and I have to withhold snacks and force him to eat some kind of meat before he's allowed any junk. but i'm almost thankful for any calories he takes in. son age 6 eats better, but is still a junk eater although he will eat some veggies, meats and fruit.

ss8 is obese. he will eat anything and everything you give him. he's also recently been found to have the gene for polycystic kidney disease which will affect him later in life, especially if he's overweight.

I think we need to feed ss8 a healthier low calorie diet. he says we can't single out his kid and let my kids eat whatever they want, which I agree with to an extent, but every person is different, and some just have to eat differently than others do. like my 9 year old needs way more calories than ss8 and should be given such. 6 yr old probably somewhere in between, and ss8 needs the lowest calories.

last night dad took ss8 to phys and occ therapy. because ss8 was 'good' at hterapy, dad took him to wawa and let him get a MILKSHAKE!!! omg, do yu know how many calories are in one of those? then the kid came home and got dinner, and a snack!!!! No wonder he's so FAT!!! Dad's not helping....

Thoughts????

asheeha's picture

try to find a reward other than food for him pronto!

all the kids should be eating healthier. even skinny people need a nutritious diet. maybe try to make a game of it.

implement exercise in your daily family time.

PeanutandSons's picture

I have this issue with my skids. SS is skinny and eats very little, and SD will eat anything and everything in sight if you let her. She is currently at an appropriate weight, but only because I watch her diet very closely.

SS gets a nutritional shake right before bed (boost plus- 360 extra calories) and he gets an extra pat of butter on his food, and he gets full fat dairy products. I also try to make something for one meal a day that SS loves, and SD doesn't like. So he will eat a ton of it, and she sil be happy only getting her small portion. The kids are unaware of the extra butter and differences in the cheese and milk.

SD gets no butter on her food, she is given low fatt/skim dairy products.

It's still a struggle, and its a constant balancing act. For example.... Yesterday they all chose thier dessert. SS chose an Orange, SD chose a kit kat bar from her Easter basket. Sunday for dessert SS chose grapes and strawberries, SD chose a peanut butter egg from her Easter basket. Ultimately SS is destined to be skinny and lean, and SD is destined to e overweight. I know as soon as she is old enough to not have her diet be in my complete control her weight will blow up. I will do what I can do while I have the power..... After that its her own issues to deal with.

Lauren1438's picture

The good thing about kids is they can BURN off what they eat as long as parents force them to be active. Get him playing. Feed all of the kids healthier, it wont kill a skinny kid to eat right because as most of us know old habits are hard to break so start while they are young. Also do home made fruit bars (you freeze them and they are like Popsicle). Or other healthy snacks that have calories. Plus it never hurts to eat healthy as an adult so you and your husband could show a good example.

knucklehead's picture

It sounds like all the kids eat crap, but your bios just have a faster metabolism.

Honestly, NONE of the kids should eat crap. Not because of weight, but because it's unhealthy for them. Skinny people have health issues, too. Smile

Healthy meals. Period. For everyone. I guarantee no one will suffer because of healthy eating.

forestfairy's picture

I agree, healthy meal for everyone. Even though your kid is skinny, you are doing him no favors by allowing him to eat only processed junk. That is so unhealthy for a growing child. You can give him extra calories with smoothies or the nutritional shakes (as suggested above). I agree with your DH that you can't single out SS and expect him to eat broccoli while your kids eat chicken nuggets and french fries. That's mean to do to a kid.

Your kid potentially will have as much of a problem as your SS. Even though your SS is overweight, you say he'll eat anything, so I'm assuming he'll eat veggies and fruits and is still getting nutrients. If your son is only eating garbage, there is NO nutrional value in that and he may be be malnourished.

Point being, EVERYONE should be eating the same healthy meals. Your son's nutritional intake should be getting equal attention to your SS's nutritional intake.

hismineandours's picture

i would try and change the whole household diet. I feed everyone the same (except myself-I will eat lo cal sometimes)-but we have varying weights. My ss14 looks like he is fresh out of a concentration cap and is wearng the same size pants as my 10 year old dd who is average for her age. My ds 12 is larger than he is by a couple of sizes and has a little chub on him (definitely seems to be baby fat) and my dd14 is 130lbs of solid muscle. There is no way I could cater to all their individual weights/diets. I buy tons and tons of fresh fruit. Just went to the store last night and bought 4 containers of blackberries, 2 of strawberries, bananas, oranges. this will all be gone in about 2 days. We all eat the heck out of it. I also buy things like lite string or cheddar cheese sticks. We usually do a decent meal every night-with a veggie, starch, and meat. We dont do desserts except once a week at my mom's. I will buy some junky type things for the kids to snack on such as peanut butter cheese crackers, fruit snacks, etc and basically everyone seems happy.

I know there was a point in which our dr. was recommending feeding ss ice cream each night to make him gain weight-this was probably 5 years ago. My dh wanted to run out and get some and I was like-you know I just dont think we can feed only ss ice cream every night-it's not right-it's a treat item and he shouldnt get more treats because he is skinny. I'm not sure he ever got my point-but since I did most of the grocery shopping and most of the meals I won that battle. SS is definitely welcome to 2nds on meals and all the fruit and such that he wants. But it is way too hard to have separate meals for everyone, and different diets. just try and live a healthy lifestyle for all your kids-even thought yours are thin now they may not be later in life and you are teaching them alot about nutrition by what you are raising them on.