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LoveBlue's picture

Hi! I'm so glad I found this forum. I'll try and explain my situation without writing a novel and I also have a question.

I am almost 27 years old and I'm married to Jason who has an almost 13 year old daughter Daisy with his ex wife Monica. Jason and Monica have joint legal custody. I've been with Jason for 8 years, married for almost 4, his daughter calls me mom as I have been there for her, her mom was too busy partying etc and I was the one there. Monica called me when Daisy was 10 and ASKED me to take Daisy to get her FIRST BRA, and has always asked me to do things so Daisy sees me as a mother figure, Monica hates that Daisy calls me mom and keeps saying I forced Daisy to call me mom which I didn't and Daisy has even told her I didn't this keeps being thrown in my face!. Monica was never a "mother" until about 3 years ago. Jason and Monica have joint legal custody of Daisy, they have had the visitation agreement changed many times, Monica wasn't happy with it, Monica couldn't get to the place at the time stated, Monica's car wont make it, blah blah blah. Monica moved 40 mins away and wouldn't do any driving, so I did it all because we wanted Daisy and didn't want to go back to court, we would even have Daisy when it wasn't Jason's weekend because Monica was out partying. Then Monica started playing head games and I couldn't do ALL the driving anymore, we told her until she could abide buy the court order we wouldn't be able to have Daisy, then she wouldn't let Jason see Daisy, things got rough and we made the decision to move across country, and we had an agreement with Monica that we would have Daisy during summers and whenever else we could fly her out, Jason called Daisy everyday, sent packages, paid his support, attended school meetings via the phone, etc, we decided to move back after a year but Jason got a job two hours away from Daisy, they went back to court and got it court ordered we would meet every other fri at 7pm (half way for each) and the same on Sunday, Monica met us twice, then she started saying her car wouldn't make the drive so she paid us gas money at times to get Daisy, then after a year or so our car was stolen, because we didn't have a car to get Daisy, we don't have many friends, my parents don't live in the same state, and there was drama with Jason's parents we decided to move again My dads health was failing and after months of not seeing Daisy we moved across country again but stayed in Daisy's life, had her for the summer etc again after a year we moved back, my parents stole money from us, my mom was addicted to pain pills etc and Jason was able to transfer back with his company back to San Diego. We still don't have a car (we have been back since Dec), Monica has a car but refuses to do the driving even once a month so we can see Daisy, even though I did all the driving all the time, we agreed in April that we would have Daisy for the summer then starting in Aug we will have her one weekend a month until we can get a car or figure out something else. Well today she called and was mad because, ugh who knows why she kept throwing stuff in our faces from years ago, she complains that she is with Daisy all the time etc and we tell her yea because she wanted full custody. Anyways, now she is saying she wants to take Jason back to court and get full custody because he isn't following the court order by having her every other weekend , will she get full custody because he doesnt have a car? so far he has followed the agreement that they made, she hasnt followed some of the other stuff in the court order as well, anyway I told her we will have her every other weekend, I don't know how but I wanted to get her off our backs. This is a woman that NEVER followed the court order, simply because she didn't want to, if we had a way to see Daisy we would...I don't see why she has to make our lives hell, it is just my husband working, he pays child support and they are taking out more than ordered because Monica got welfare years ago, oh yea about that she lied and said they were separated and they weren't living together when she got welfare yet it was a lie! But welfare said since that money was paid to her for their daughter he has to pay it back. Like I said there is soooooo much more but I didn't want to write a book lol. I don't see why it is ok for her not to follow the court order for no reason at all but the minute we can't because of an actual issue she wants to go back to court...could the court possibly order her to do the driving for a certain amount of time?, UGH if I could make a car appear out of thin air we would never have a problem.

BTW Jason and I are in San Diego, Daisy is in Ontario and we are supposed to meet in Temecula.

Anyone in San Diego want to help us get to Temecula for visitation? LOL

Sorry if this doesn't make sense I'm still a little upset from her phone call.