Is he cheating?
So im 10 wks pregnant and ever since i have been pregnant he has been spending a lot of time with "friends" THEY ARE NOT EVEN HIS FRIENDS, I DONT EVEN KNOW THESE DUDES ONLY MEET THEM ONCE! Im not sure if he's stressed out about how his daughter will react to the pregnancy or what. But he has been extremely distant. Friday, I told him we needed to talk to about what his plans are about our marriage due to him being irresponsible and not taking care of the things he needs for court THAT IM JUST NOW FINDING OUT after i told him time after time. I cant afford to take care of THREE kids, mines, his daughter AND HIM! Well, that night he got off work at 10pm and didnt come til 2am! He told me he was going to deposit my check and get a money order at the 24 hr cash place, hmmm thats only 5 away. So for two hrs im calling and texting and he finally responds and says "im driving i have a lot on my mind" yet he cant call or answer after i called him? hmmm....he then comes home and tells me he was driving around and went to his friends house. He smelled like beer and smoke. More like a bar smell to me. Atleast 3-4x a week he is going to his friends house DURING THE WEEK! What is a married man doing at a single guys house who has women over all the time? I see the text msgs sometimes about him wanting to come over, but why? I dont even see my girls but maybe once every two months, even though we may talk daily. He has never been like this. He has TRUE friends that i i have known for 5 years, I know nothing of these guys. I asked him how would he feel if 11pm im telling you im going to go drink at my friends that you dont even know! OH AND GUYS MAY BE THERE TOO! I guess im so worried because i heard a story about him and his ex, when she was pregnant he went on a date with another girl, only because she cheated before she got pregnant so he was mad. But he would probably do the same to me if i mad him mad. He left an hr and half ago and hasnt returned any phone calls or text. I can see him going out with friends during the weekend but at 10pm-2am on weeknights? I do not believe he is just in the company of men. Are my hormones wacky or am i making sense?
ooo girl you have a right to
ooo girl you have a right to "overreact" in this case!! I would not be sitting at home worrying if my husband is being unfaithful to me, i would be Checking up on him. And if he wanted to "go to a friends house" at 10 at night several times a week i would be telling him not to bother coming home!! im sorry you are going through this but you are married and pregnant and should not be having to deal with these childish issues. he needs to grow up!!
I would be trusting my gut.
I would be trusting my gut. There is absolutely no point in asking him, I don't think there is a man alivei who when asked if they are having an affair would answer "Yeah, sure I am" . It's been said before if they will cheat with you, they will cheat on you. He has proved he is capable of cheating, and using the excuse - well she cheated on me first is a bit feeble. He waited until his former partner was pregnant then cheated, now you are pregnant and suspect him of cheating. As I said I would trust my gut. Now the problem is what do you want to do here. You are carrying a baby you do not need the stress, you do not need the anguish, what you and the baby do need is the love and support of the baby's father. I am assuming from your comment that you have been trying to pin him down to what his plans are for your marriage that you are not married to this guy. Best you find out now what kind of man he is BEFORE you marry him.
For a man who has a parter waiting at home for him, he is going out on the town way too much, whether he is cheating or not, it is way too much. However he has a PREGNANT partner at home, so what the hell is he thinking.
Perhaps you need to discuss why he doesn't want to come home that is the big issue here.
I am so sorry you are having to go through this it is an awful thing to have to deal with at any time but is particularly stressful when you are pregnant. Don't know if you can get him followed or not but maybe that would put your mind a rest. And that is the most important thing here, your peace of mind. Do what you have to, to settle yourself.
If he has a smart phone there
If he has a smart phone there are programs you can download onto it that he will never know are there (they are undetectable) that will tell you when you log in on your home computer where he is.
And before anyone reads me the riot act, no I do not use it, have not used it. But if my dh was acting the way yours is, I would be! Something is really off here, you need to protect yourself and your unborn child. Suppose he IS cheating, not using protection, gets an s.t.d, gives it to you and you then pass it to your baby! Do something and do it soon, protect yourself and your baby.
He has NO right to put either one of you at risk that way. Its selfish and childish. He already has a child, he should know that.
I'm so sorry you are going through this, and at a time you should be most happy! Best of luck to you. Keep us updated.
My Ex was cheating on
My Ex was cheating on me.....He wasnt as obviously missing as much as yours...but I knew....your gut feeling tells you....but being pregnant...your gut feeling would be out of wack....
but, I was so frustrated over reasoning....I knew he was up to something that gave me the feeling 'he isnt the man I fell in love with and he is so distant towards me' He was wearing his clothes different., money was missing from our a/c, he acted different around the kids, he started looking different in his face....yet he was still happy to have sex with me....
the other tell tale hint was; i couldnt call him wen I wanted....he just wouldnt ansa the phone....or turn it off.... and
the work place was a no go to me....even when he was leaving for operation OS., he didnt want me and the kids going to his work, to see him go and wave good by....(i went anyway...and he hid inside for like an hour...made some excuse)
I hate him still .....good luck....I hope he aint doing this stuff to you...
Even if he's not cheating,
Even if he's not cheating, what a dick! You are home pregnant and he's staying out all hours of the night partying with friends and ignoring your calls and texts. This is not acceptable! His behavior is making it look like he's cheating even if he's not. He's checked out from your relationship right now and it sounds like he's not thrilled about the pregnancy. I would not put up with this if I were you. He needs to be home, with you, helping you out because you are PREGNANT WITH HIS CHILD! I seriously want to smack him upside the head for you.