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Have you ever gotten even with BM?

LittlePanda's picture

Have any of you ladies ever done anything (proud of it or not) to get even with BM over anything, or, just because you hate her??

Personally, I have not had the opportunity to screw over BM, but I definitely fantasize about it.

If you COULD do something to BM, what would you do?

Just curious!!!! }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:) }:)

Frustr8d1's picture

I fantasize every day about sending SD11 back to BM when SD is 16 yrs old. We have had full custody of SD for 7 yrs now and BM has only seen SD three times. But, during those 3 visits, BM has damaged SD beyond repair and each time, sent her back to us to deal with and try to correct/teach.

I would just love to wait....and keep SD for a few more years full time....then, suddenly drop SD off on BM's doorstep when SD is in the peak of her terrible and expensive teen years.

Of course, this is only a fantasy but the idea of BM having to STRESS over all the child raising issues that she so EASILY CHOSE TO ESCAPE....fantasy.

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

I just called her out on her parenting skills ~ just trying to help ( but apparently that was a no no ) but the pure joy and satisfaction was soooooooo freakin word it. Mother of the year goes to " Tinkerdouche"

Maxwell09's picture

Yep! ^^^ This is how I do it.

BM likes to blame me for all of her problems and then go on social media to talk about how horrible I am (God forbid I take a pics with SS) so I just respond with a post of my own reminding her how wonderful her own parenting of SS is with such things like:

forgetting her kid for a major holiday, forgetting to bring his carseat for pick him up, being engaged to three different men before your kids 3rd Birthday, forgetting to schedule any and all dr/dentist appointments, refusing to let the kid wear underwear because it would ruin her bed…

I could go on for days. She usually shuts right on up for the next three or so months and the cycle repeats. The Truth hurts more than saying mean things and the only way to argue with the truth is for her lie and make herself look even more foolish.

ej'scrazy's picture

We have had opportunities to get back at BM. Most of the time, we haven't as that would just create havoc for the kids.

There was a situation where we "got" even. BM hates me. I'm sure you are used to that. At the time, I was blissfully unaware that she wanted me to have nothing to do with the kids, until the kids made some snide comment about "Mommy thinks you suck." Caught me off guard, but I know those weren't the kids talking, it was BM. At that time, we had the kids about 75% of the time, due to BM's work schedule. DH let BM know that I was no longer willing to watch the kids on her time, if she was going to be derogatory towards me. She let loose, of course. How dare we not be at her beck and call. She said she'd hire a sitter.

Fast forward three months, sitter was "fired", because (according to the kids) "Mommy didn't like her either." Sitter and I have a mutual friend who gave me a heads up about her quitting, not being fired. Seems BM didn't pay her the agreed upon amount in the agreed upon time. So she let BM know if she couldn't keep the agreement, she wouldn't be able to watch the kids.

BM tells DH that the girls WILL BE here with ME on HER time, as I am their stepmother and I have a responsibility to them. She should not have to pay for a babysitter when he has "free babysitting" available. DH responded that with a nice response. If you are willing to pay $10 per hour, ej will be happy to watch the girls on YOUR time. Payment is due before the time, so that it is paid. Otherwise, you are welcome to look for another sitter." I honestly don't mind the kids most of the time, but since BM didn't appreciate two years of free babysitting, and wanted to be nasty, DH decided she didn't need our help, we didn't have to give it.

Rags's picture

Damned skippy I have gotten my ton or two of flesh out of the Sperm Idiot and the Sperm Clan. I made it my hobby for the entire 17+ years of the Custody/Visitation/Support CO that we lived under with my SS to shred their idiot asses very chance they gave me.

I was very good at it. }:) }:) }:)

When they got toxic we would refuse to buy the outbound plane ticket for them to take visitation. They did not have credit cards or even bank accounts so they could not buy visitation plane tickets. When they were reasonable we bought the tickets and they wrote us a check for their half. When they were toxic we would quote the CO "Each party is responsible to transport the child to their location" and would not put the kid on a plane if they had not provided the ticket to transport him to Sperm Land.

When they tried to have my income considered to lower DipSHit's CS obligation I brainstormed the motion to have the Sperm GrandParents income added to DickHead's for CS calculation. They just about stroked out over that one. }:)

When they would take the travel money we gave to SS for gas, or to buy lunch for the broke assed Sperm Clan we stopped giving him cash and gave him a debit card to a $0 balance bank account. On a few occasions they ordered meals for the family thinking the Skid could pay for it with the travel money they assumed was accessible by his debit card. }:) We only transferred money in to that account when he was traveling and we transferred money completely out when he would text us that he had arrived in Sperm Land.

That was one of my personal favorites. I loved barring their asses in their little home town. }:)

hereiam's picture

Well, I personally didn't get even with her but the only time BM filed for CS modification after the divorce, my DH had been laid off (unbeknownst to BM) and the modification was denied. She was PISSED. She just knew she was getting a raise.

I love it when the universe just takes care of it.

LittlePanda's picture

Sounds similar to my 'karma revenge.' BM was gone for much of SD's life, came in and out, jail, etc..and now her daughter calls me 'Mom' and constantly talks about our family when she is with BM. BM sees her often now. SD never calls BM when she is with us (and I tell her she can every day) but she sure as hell calls us when she is with BM.

Poodle's picture

Ah, the CS modification moment... our BM went for a modification at the termination date and sought a large monthly sum. Our evidence cut her down to a sensibly small amount, she had a finding of dishonesty made against her, and she (or rather her nasty dad) ended up paying a huge sum to her lawyers just to make a few pennies. She never repeated that mistake.

Dizzy's picture

I took the high road, but I was EXTREMELY tempted to post her bra & underwear selfie and her topless bubble bath selfie that I found on SD's iPad to...somewhere...maybe TheDirty.com? I believe in Karma, and I believe she's getting really close to receiving it, and I didn't want to mess that up by acting rashly, plus I didn't want to earn myself some bad karma...just waiting patiently.

step off already's picture

My favorite actually just happened a few months ago. BM has been losin it and slipping greatly ( dh is custodial, bm has every ither weekend, drugs, alcohol... Lots if drama with her gf and her bfs)

Anyway, she was having a meltdown one day and had the nerve to call dh crying, "i miss you". He hung up on her. She called again. I told her not to call my dh - in so many words. A few minutes later, she texts (my assumption is she was just going down her list if men hs thiught would come "save" her) "I'm horny. I wanna fuck. I wan dis"

Well, dh has a RO against her so we immediately contacted the police. But a few minutes later she texted "sorry, wrong person". But then throughout th day he continued to receive texts from her about how she gives up, how she's tired of the drama and then later ones asking not to tell.

OBT, she lives in the family home with the woman she left dh for. That's the two 60 year old parents, bm's GF and BM.

I took the opportunity to screenshot all of the day's texts and send then to he GF and both her parents.

Mysteriously, bm was not getting along with the parents soon after. (Let me also tell you that bm works about 10 hours weekly and the gf has supported her for the last 9 years).

Mysteriously, bm now lives in her own super janky one bedroom apartment - no doubt paid for by the gf. It has no AC (in a town that is 100+ degrees all summer) and ss14 complains if lots of fly strips.

Enjoy BM! You are livin' the life. You have people furnishing your "lifestyle" for you and you are showing ss14 the difference between the good life and yours.

Oh. Bm no longer has her gf's parents to watch ss during her visitation or cook for him so she really gets a taste of being mommy (after a solid absence from age 5-11). Ss is also getting a true pic of his mom and the great life he's missing out on.

No surprise that he has no desire to exercise the visitation he whined for just a year and a half ago now that it's just bm he is with.

LittlePanda's picture

OMG this give me hope and faith that one day BM's parents will finally kick her free loading, lazy, druggy ass OUT!!! I would so love to see how it turns out when she actually has to do some parenting and care giving!!! lol!!!!

step off already's picture

Oh just to clarify. These are the GF's parents. The GF she is "just friends" with. The same gf she left dh to be with. The same gf that now pays for her one bedroom apartment to keep the peace with her own parents and her lover.

LittlePanda's picture

I fantasize about telling BM's baby daddy/boyfriend that she's been talking to/seeing her ex boyfriend (from what SD tells me.) Her baby daddy left his wife and family in another state to come be with BM when she got out of jail, they broke up, he went back to his family, found out she was preg and came back to live with BM in her parents house. Classy stuff right there!!!

Mentalgirl48's picture

Oh yes. I busted her by contacting her married Bf's wife via internet..poor woman had no idea her husband was cheating on her with Cuntzilla.. I had enough of her using me to watch her kids and pulled the rip cord on her affair... Ha.. Caused a big problem for a bit but I don't regret it one bit. She was behaving badly and blowing off her own kids to run around with a married man. And yes it affected my life so I put a stop to it. Now she really knows that I can't stand her.

atpeace's picture

The best "revenge" if you could call it that was that I never had the desire TO ENGAGE...the steps are older 18 & 21 and much like her so I had no desire nor did my SO push for it...so what eats her up alive is that I have no interest - don't push for any sort of relationship and we live our lives happily without all the stress. I felt since the skids are adults and from the onset I made it clear I had no interest in being their step-mom...but they were welcome in our home and our lives the choice was their - I always leave the door open and when I do see them am cordial - polite and make sure they know they are welcome...they both have had a hard enough time with the divorce and don't believe in adding to it...and they are not interested in being a part of our lives anyhow.

Drac0's picture

Not exactly our proudest moment but last Easter weekend, we pulled SS out of school 15 minutes early to deny Donkeykong his visitation. The problem is that the CO stipulates that HALF of Easter holidays is spent with the father and half is spent with the mother. Well according to Donkeykong, "half" means he gets ALL of Good Friday. ALL of Saturday and 3/4 of Sunday (which only gives us Easter Sunday evening). Donkeykong would pick up SS right after school and then refuse to answer his phone or texts when we try to get custody of SS for our half of Easter. So this year we turned the tables on him. We kept SS for Friday, Saturday and 3/4 of the day on Sunday. Donkeykong was litereraly pleading with us to not do this to him and his family as they had made plans. It was truly funny.

AllySkoo's picture

Nah, I never really wanted to "get" BM. I will admit I enjoy hearing stories about her train wreck of a life though. }:)

BM is incapable of being alone, even for a day. She and DH got married young (20). She decided she wanted out of that marriage, so she started dating again - without telling DH. She eventually found another guy to marry her, so she divorced DH and within 6 months was married to StepDad1. That wasn't working so well, so she started dating again, found another guy to marry her, told StepDad1 she wanted a divorce (yes, in this order), and married StepDad2.

Here's where it gets good though.

Things with StepDad2 were getting old, so she started dating again. She found a likely guy. The plan was that they were going to tell their respective spouses they wanted divorces, and then move in together that weekend. BM tells StepDad2 she wants a divorce... and then finds out that NewGuy has decided not to leave his wife. She was PANICKED. Lol She got back together with StepDad2 that same day, told him she'd "reconsidered".

My personal belief (I have no proof) is that she's still dating. Only this time she's not going to date married men - too unreliable. Once she finds the next schmuck though, she'll divorce StepDad2 and remarry again. I'm fascinated, and I wonder how many times she can pull it off!

Drac0's picture

Your BM is the epitome of the stereotype. When it comes to relationships, some women (men too!) are like monkeys swinging from branch to branch to branch. However they won't let go of the previous branch unless the next one is grasped securely.

AllySkoo's picture

What utterly and completely kills me though is that my youngest SD seems to be turning out like her mom. Which is awful, because this girl actually had a shot at leading a better life. She's now 17, entering her junior year of high school, and pregnant (to hold on to the guy, we think) - and her BM is *thrilled*. :sick: This is one train wreck I wish I could *not* watch.

SMof2Girls's picture

Nope. Best way to get even, IMO, is to live a happy life without worrying about her or what she thinks of me.

I don't have time for her nonsense petty games. DH deals with her to the extent it impacts his custody arrangement or the kids. I'm not sure why people get so actively involved in knowing what's going with the BMs in their lives. It's a waste of energy.

misSTEP's picture

I think that us still being together so many years after dealing with all her BS (and me not having to be preggo to hang onto him either!) is revenge enough.

But if you want to know my schadenfreude moments...

1. Almost every single time we went to court (BM initiated), the judge would reprimand her for how she acted to DH. (not that it did much good but it was nice to hear her getting reamed occasionally)

2. Once she took the skids out of state across country for a month long vacation...when the skids were in school. She also had a CS hearing scheduled and took her vacation around that. Boy was she PISSED when she came back, expecting another big hike and getting LESS than she was previously (thanks to my research).

3. Anytime we were able to prove to anyone else what kind of a liar she is/was.

4. When DH got a judgment against her for Contempt of Court for $500. Like Will Tomorrow's BM, ours didn't pay it but we just subtracted it from the massive amount of medical bills she drummed up for the healthy skids. The only other thing that accomplished was made BM QUIT taking DH to court every.single.year.

5. When my DH first went to court to establish his rights, it was nice to realize that she WAS a shit mom and DH wasn't just exaggerating. She fought, most of all, the No Contact Order we asked for (and told our lawyer was a NECESSITY). If she was all about what was best for the kids, she wouldn't do things like call up my phone and scream at my DH...or come out on her front lawn (after skids are already buckled in our car) and scream at us like a harpy shrew. She would have fought how much visitation my DH got (although she just denied most of it anyway. See #4).

6. Now our revenge is that we are empty-nesters while she had another baby right before the skids aged out of the CO (just like I predicted many years prior).

KB14's picture

My skids are 6 & 8. Theyrr awful, brats, but they say how their mom is never aroubd, they go days with out seeibg her because chasing every tom, dick, and hairy. Then tries to be mom of tge year when something happens,or a family function. All this c* *t does is yell and scream at these kids. She's an aweful parent.

Mentalgirl48's picture

My hero!! Same here when Dh is working skids are not taking my time

They are with BM whether she likes it or not. I stopped being a sitter a couple of years ago. Period. The custody order does not include my name.