Handing Kids Everything
So next week SD15 wants to get her hair dyed, I told her I would pay but she has to do some chores around the house. BM threw a fit, she deserves things without having to do something for them. BLAH BLAH BLAH, DH told BM then she can pay for it but we think chores are required for the extras. (DH gives SD cash every time he drops her off so she can have some during the week, on top of the child support, on top of the braces payments, on top of use grubhubbing her food 3-4 times a week, and on top of us buying groceries for the kid. And anytime BM ask for help with something school clothes, new shoes, all that we pitch in (if not pay totally) )
Well DH dad told us today he is going to buy SD15 a car for her 16th birthday, and this made me mad. DH does not see anything wrong with it. I told him we can't just hand SD everything she wants. DH agreed that if she does get a car it will be for use only at our house where we can watch what she is doing. DH dad said he is buying it so he thinks SD should be able to take it home and use it. (We get SD every other weekend if she feels like coming over or she has ran out of money). She live in a bigger city around 45 mins away from us.
1st off BM will take the care away from her and use it whenever she wants. BM is driving a POS car right now without air, heat, and it breaks down every other week. And BM just got pulled over two weeks ago for driving without insurance, tags and all that. So if SD had a car then she would take it since she can't keep hers up
2nd SD15 runs wild as it is where she lives, with a car she would be much worse. She is one of the least responsible kids I have ever met (DH is a big part of that cant blame BM totally).
3rd of all DH is going to have to cover insurance and everything. BM or SD will either wreck the car or BM will take it over total leaving DH responsible.
Should DH stand up to his dad and say no or just let it go. I really hate the idea of handing a kid a new car at 16, especially one who does nothing at all to help anyone at our house and just uses us.
I know this shouldn't make me this mad but it bugs me when everyone just feels like to make a kid like them hand them everything. I am over here driving a POS too and SD will be driving a brand new car and DH will be paying gas insurance and everything. And the main reason I dont have a new car is right now we can't afford all the extras on it. So that makes me salty to SD will be driving a nicer car then me, and DH will be getting further behind money wise to cover insurance.