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graduation tonight with ex-H

Swim_Mom's picture

When you get divorced you know the day is coming...tonight, youngest DD14's 8th grade graduation. Only 4 tickets so that's me, DH, ex-H and DS18 - DD19 staying down at university this summer. Because parking will be challenging, ex-H will come over to our house and we will all drive together - it's at the high school. Ex-H's engagement just broke off and he is living with his sister and her husband for awhile...this is going to be so painfully awkward!!! We have a dinner later but my parents and a good family friend will be there so that should be better.  Just shoot me now...

tog redux's picture

Why can't he Uber over, or have someone drop him off? How did it become your responsibility to get your XH to your DD's graduation? I'd nope right out of that one. 


StrawberryPie's picture

I'm confused. If you are uncomfortable doing this, what is the reason you are going along with this?  No need to add drama where there isn't any.

SayNoSkidsChitChat's picture

Why is there a hullabaloo over finishing 8th grade?! 

You are under no obligation to do anything with or for your ex.

Oh great; now I gotta fret over keeping Biowh0re and her dirtclan away from my husband! :,(

Swim_Mom's picture

In our area it's done this way, the girls all get very dressed up and she wanted to go to dinner afterwards and before the party.

flmomma08's picture

Did he ask if he could ride with you? Whose idea was that? If its going to be awkward I would have him find his own transportation. Not your problem!

Swim_Mom's picture

I'm not usually a sucker, in fact never... but you are all absolutely correct. I compare it to winning a game 72 to 2. It doesn't feel good, and you need to throw the losing team a bone once in awhile. I feel sorry for my ex-H for many, many reasons but the main one right now is, DD does not really care if he's there or not and even commented it means a lot more for her stepdad to be at her graduation than her dad. ex-H is driving about 5 hours for this. Thanks for listening and I'd have given me the same advice Smile

Merry's picture

I get the "awkward." Spent time with my ex-H and his new wife at our DD's graduation (college). I like his wife a whole lot better than I like him, and he managed to demonstrate yet again why I divorced him.

It sucks but you'll get through it.

Just J's picture

DH and I both get major anxiety at the thought of having to see BM. The stepkids are adults now but there's graduations and weddings and stuff in our future. The last time we saw her was SD's college graduation a few years ago and even though I just saw her in passing for a second, and DH had like a 2 minute converstion with her, it was so super awkward and we were both so tense. It's the worst. I'm glad these occasions don't come up that often anymore. 

futurobrillante99's picture

My first husband and father of my kids and I have reached a kind of "friendship," one could say. We don't communicate often, but communicate well in regards to our kids. We help each other out. The family dog lives with him and I've been dog sitting while he's out of town. Not sure I'd do it if the dog wasn't our family dog, but I might. We have celebrated the kids' birthdays together in the last year and split the tab. He even rode with me to the restaurant for the last outing. I don't feel anything other than kindness towards him and appreciation for being a good father. New guy doesn't seem threatened - and he shouldn't.

XH1 reminds me on the regular why we aren't together. He isn't a bad person, but he's very needy, miserly, and likes to take digs at people. I also don't like how nasty he can be with our DS23.

Otherwise, he's a decent human being, unlike his successor.

1wonder woman's picture

I feel for you.... but I personally would not put myself through the pain... just not worth it. sorry I would of taken a separate car or heck had someone drop me off and pick me up if there was limited parking. Plus I know how it feels to be the divorced child my parents were also divorced and remarried... I'm sure the kid felt very uncomfortable too... heck when I was kid I preferred my parents not being in the same room let alone in car... I could only imagine how you felt and everyone else in that car... painfully awkward to say the least... uhg!