Get Him OUT!
This is my first post (sooo glad I found this place!) and hopefully won't be too long...
I have an SS15 and SS10, married for last year and 1/2, together 3 before that. BP CRAZY BM that has been hell since day 1. (Wish I would've found this place earlier so someone could tell me to RUN!)
My dilemma is that I have an extremely lazy SS15 that I have lost all patience for. He thinks sitting in class all day is too hard, he has too much homework, etc... Needless to say he gets this from his mother who is working on a 4 year degree going on 6 and 1/2 years now. She can't take summer classes because it doesn't suit her "learning style" and has to babysit her 15 and 10 year-old. (Normally I could care less, except that DH's maintenance got extended an extra 2 years for her to take her sweet ass time finishing!)
He has no motivation to do anything- he won't go outside when we all go for walks/play catch, he doesn't want to get his license because it's too much work with school, he's disrespectful to DH... and he is quite a loner. He hates our house because we have too many rules and he said to DH last week that if it were up to him, he'd live at his mom's, have a fridge and TV in his room and do nothing all day. Needless to say this is the extreme opposite of how I was raised. My DH and I just had our first child and I really don't want SS15's negative energy rubbing off on him. So I want him out. At least during the week. Problem is we have the boys 1/2 the time (Wed/Thurs and every other weekend) and she has made it very clear recently that she is too busy for extra time with the boys. Even though when SS15 was 11, BM texted DH that she couldn't wait for him to turn 12 so he could choose to live with her full time.
I just want him to stay there during the week and keep every other weekend as is. (It would be nice if it were both SSs, but I don't want to press my luck) DH is a great dad, and is surprisingly on board, but doesn't think BM will go for it. Any suggestions out there???