Just a question as alot of stuff recently has been on my mind and this most recent thing is really worrying me.
Is it normal for a SO to pay their ex wifes debt?
I don't know if he has or not, but I found a part of a letter in his bag the other day addressed to BM so she had obvs given it to him. It was for unpaid debt from claiming too much benefits - from the date they split and he moved out.
Now, he has told me he isn't paying it and hasn't paid it but I have an awful gut feeling he will have just for an easy life.
Problem is we are trying to pay for our wedding, already have our own debt and I am sooooo careful with what I spend as I'm only part time I have nothing after the mortgage is paid. He used to transfer the mortgage money into my account but during lockdown he said we were struggling since paying for the wedding so I told him not to worry and with overtime I'm getting from work ill manage. We have 1 daughter togrther and he has 3 boys to her - one of which lives with us full time. ALL my money is spent on stuff for the house or the kids - primarily my daughter but I do treat the boys as well when I can.
My question is, if he pays her debt on his credit card for example, is it any of my business since he is paying for bills etc for our house? I only work part time so he picks up most of the bills but I feel this is something he should not have even considered and shouldn't have even taken the letter off of her. He should have told her flat no. He said he hasn't paid it and unless I snooped through his card statements I'd probably never find out if he has but he already treated me like a fool when I asked him about it and he said oh she just wants me to see if I paid it from my account already back in those dates its from. Think shes trying to dispute it. Bullsh*t. I'm not an idiot. She ripped the bottom half of the letter off because all he needed to know was the amount owed and not how much she has been given every month.
Sorry for ranting I just feel that sometimes I stress myself out over stuff I can't control or do anything about - or perhaps shouldn't be stressing about in the first place! But something like putting OUR family under financial strain to make sure she isn't, is not in my opinion acceptable. I really hope he hasn't paid it otherwise he's lied to my face twice!