Yes I said nine years and she still can't get over the fact that her ex-husband my fiance has moved on, loves me deeply and we are extremely happy, content and he has NO desire to get back with her! The Ex-W and fiance were married for 19 years and have three children together she already had a son from someone else when they got married. They got married because she got pregnant and it was the right thing for them to do as they were living together. She popped out the first son and 13 months later a set of twin boys and 18 months after that a daughter... She loves her children but has never been a what I would consider a good mother, she drinks too much, smokes too much and lays around doing nothing too much. The adult kids tell stories of how she used them to fetch soda and smokes for her. She stayed home to take care of the kids and they divorced when the youngest was 16, the kids all stayed with their dad (my fiance). She only see's the kids on holidays or special occasions and she randomly misses those from time to time. I get along great with all of my future adult skids and they include me in everything which drives their BM insane! She has tried to push me out of the skids lives over and over and the skids push back telling her to move on. She wont, she recently demanded that I not go to SS's wedding & reception, crying to everyone that I was trying to take her place. She told my fiance that if I went she would not go and he said well that is your decision. Note that she did not do one single thing for the wedding, no shower, no party, no offer to help the bride's family do anything. In fact I planned the rehearsal dinner and sent the invitations as my fiance was paying for the dinner (she never asked about it or offered any assistance). Needless to say I was at the rehearsal, wedding and reception, I walked down the aisle with my fiance and we sat in the second row directly behind her. I swear I heard growling during the ceremony. Even after all of that when it came time for pictures she wanted them to take pictures with them all together like one big happy family. Thank goodness my future SDIL had given the photographer instructions and she did her pictures with the wedding party... And then they called up my fiance and I for pictures. Not a single picture of her with him! Trust me she would have made it her facebook profile picture as she has family pictures with all of them on her FB from 10 plus years ago. I have two more of my future SS's weddings this year to deal with her. Any advice on how I can let go of the anger and frustration that she brings out in me by merely being present! And to top it off one of the weddings is on New Years Eve, oh hooray we get to spend our first married NYE with his Ex-W!