Feel like an Afterthought
My BF & I are in the midst of transition hell. I don't know if my frustration is valid or if I'm being thin-skinned. Here's the short of it:
The almost-ex-wife (courtdate 3/7) is preparing to move out, I'm preparing to move in. BF offers weeks ago to get boxes & I keep reminding with no result. Normal Guy Thing. Then 3 days ago:
Me: "Any chance of getting boxes for this weekend?"
Him: "Oh, sure. Patty wants more boxes, she asked me the other day. I'll talk to the guys at work."
That's what is stuck in my craw. His presentation makes me feel as if he is fulfilling the request for her & I'm the extra added bonus afterthought.
I spoke up about being upset & his response was "You need to stop thinking that way."
He loves me, he's sorry he upsets me. He's not good with words, says the wrong thing often, but every so often it's a feeling of daggers to the heart and I can't brush it off.
I can't figure out if I'm making too much of it just because I'm raw over everything that has transpired over the last few months.
In four days the pre-ex is moving out, in five days her BF returns from his homeland and moves into her rental house. I begin the move a week later, after the kids make the shift into the rental house with Mom. I don't wish to introduce undue strife into the mix, but I also do not want to move in & unpack a box of frustration & hurt that stems from the boxes conversation (and others like it).
It just wouldn't be healthy to start out our life together that way.
How do I handle it?
Do I handle it?
Do I have to suck it up & walk it off?
I'm new to the game (no, I don't see it as a game) of a blended family & don't want to wreck the good I have with the kids & would like to let go of the anger I have toward the pre-ex (specifically how her attempted sabotage wounded me) & start fresh with her when I move in.
Once again, how?
ISO words of wisdom & constructive opinion