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Do you think parents should get a tattoo with their kids name on it?

Lizz741's picture

So I recently saw a father on Facebook who seems obsessed over his 1 year old daughter. He recently posted pictures with her on the beach so he was shirtless. He had a few tattoos on his arm but then I saw a tattoo on his chest of his daughter's name!!! I believe he's a single dad so can you imagine if he ever dates again? He's sending the message loud and clear that his daughter is #1. A woman will have to see his daughter's name all the time when she lays on his chest. Is that crazy??? Would you ever consider getting a tattoo like that??? I'm just curious. Isn't that a little too possessive???

Jcksjj's picture

My SD is named after a flower (unusual flower name though) and DH said he thought about getting a tattoo of the flower before. I'm glad he didnt because that would look ridiculous. Also, not gonna lie, I'm not interested in being reminded of her looking at DH.

I wouldn't get my kids' names, but they were all born on the same date of different months so I did consider a small tattoo of the number of the day they were all 3 born on.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

Not my business, but I'd interpret that as a warning and run for the hills.

Miss T's picture

... should get a tattoo of anything anywhere (though I've often threatened DH that I would get a little pair of lips tattooed smack in the center of my right butt cheek and invite offensive persons to kiss the target). But I don't do it because, while a little tattoo here or there can be cute at first, have you seen the horror they turn into after about 20 years? Besides, it's fun to watch DH go into a tailspin at the threat.

As for someone getting their kid's name inked into their skin ... ugh. Dump and run.

Sandybeaches's picture

Is at the very least CREEPY!!! and OP makes a good point about laying on it and seeing it ........ YUCK!! CREEPY!!! WEIRD!!

I am not a fan of tattoos' and if I was I could never commit to an image or saying.. I can not even decide what to put on my checks so I get no design.  :) 

Dawn-Moderator's picture

However, my ss's Bm has a tattoo of each of her kid's names, one on each shoulder.

I think in Bm's case,  it is because of her feeling (but never admitting) that she was a crappy mom. This makes up for that, I guess.

Just my opinion.

 

tog redux's picture

I'm not a tattoo fan, personally - but if the man had a small and tasteful tattoo with his kid's name on it, that would be okay. But not a giant one stretching across his chest, nope.

CLove's picture

Has a tatoo of a hibiscus flower on her shoulder. She claims it is symbolic of her eldest, who is named after a flower, just not THAT one.

She keeps telling Munchkin that she is going to get another tatoo to honor her too, someday.

I think its a little over the top and I would not want that reminder. DH has a tatoo on his leg of his astrology sign.

I myself am not into tatoos.

notarelative's picture

He has a huge tattoo of his kid now. If he has another child, he either has to get another huge tattoo, or tell his second child she/he isn't as important as the first.

It could be worse. He could have a huge tattoo of BM's name.

WwCorgi7's picture

My husband got one when his daughter was a year old he was 18 at the time. I met him when she was 3. It never really bothered me because he was into tattoos back then, he only has 2. He also got them done for free by a friend and they look terrible. He eventually grew out of that phase. He regrets/hates them so much now but he feels guilty to get it removed or covered up. It's really common where I live. I think I'm only one of the few in town that doesn't have any tattoos. A guy I worked with had 9 kids and tattoos for each one so it could be worse.

Elite2020's picture

I have a cousin who has his son's names tattooed on his arm with their date of birth and also included his SS. 

Iamwoman's picture

To answer the OP's question:

No. I do not think parents should get a tattoo of their kid's name.

I'm not a tattoo fan, but IMO "name" tattoos are the trashiest of all.

Everyone has their own definition of "trashy" though, and from what I've seen, truly trashy people never think they are trashy but certainly think so of others.

Etither way, what each of us thinks about this subject is irrelevant.

Those of us who say "nay" would never be with a partner who has such a tattoo, and those who say "yay" will defend their own honor and imagine negative things about anyone who disagrees.

So, moral of the story: If you don't like it, stay away from it. If you don't care, snuggle that tattoo-laden SO.

I view tattoos the same way I view sexual orientation: I don't care what you do in your own bedroom or to your own body as long as you don't rub it in my face and seek approval from me or expect me to applaud your choices - keep it to yourself.

Sandybeaches's picture

In this case "  as long as you don't rub it in my face"  It is kind of rubbing it in your face if you don't like tattoo's and certainly if you don't want to look at Step-kids name.  It would always be there right in your face.  

Iamwoman's picture

Exactly.

Which is why I would never be with someone who has sort of tattoo, and why I would leave someone who didn't have one, but then got one (as I would have made myself clear from the beginning).

If the guy claimed it was a spur of the moment mistake, then he could prove it by using laser removal and getting rid of the tattoo.

So we only let it get rubbed in our face if we want to.

Everything in life is a choice. If someone else makes a choice I don't like I can choose to rid my life of that person. 
Simple.

Lndsy747's picture

My boyfriend got our daughter's initials tattooed on his arm after she was born along with her birthday. They have the same initials. SD had been completely alienated for almost 2 years when DD was born and he was excited to have another chance at being a father. It's never bothered me at all honestly.

Now what I do think is gross is that for the first few years after I meet him he talked a lot about wanting to get his daughters FACE tattooed on him. I talked him out of it several time and thank God he never did it. I'm sure he'd deeply regret it if he ever had.

Based on what I see on Pinterest BM and SD are planning matching mother/daughter tattoos and I find that equally gross. 

Seriously7's picture

It probably doesn't bother you because it's your daughter's initials tattooed on him. My brother in law has my niece and nephews names tattooed on him and it doesn't bother my sister because they're her kids. It comes across as marking your territory in a way.

shamds's picture

sisters and suoer close), the eldest has 2 kids (boy and girl) and has both their names tattoed on her inner wrist or inner arm somewhere. 

My religion strictly forbids it because we see it as somewhat desecrating a body which we should be respecting and keeping clean and healthy but i know people who justify tattooes as art when others see it as vandalizing your body in a way...

People don’t think when they tattoo a wife/husband or partners name on that they could split up and then they struggle to get rid of the tattoo ink 

Thisisnotus's picture

DH has both skids names as a tattoo. He has a lot of other tattoos so they don't stand out. 

I suggested that he didn't get our DDs name added and he Has not. 
 

I think it's kinda weird.....

Dads_Wife's picture

My FDH has a big one on his inner arm of FSD. It used to peeve me, but he had her so young and has plenty of other DUMB tattoos that now they all kind of blend together of how stupid they are. I mean, he was in the time of tribals so he looks dumb already. I make fun of him frequently.

The only kid tattoo I would get would be of a drawing they drew (small) when they were like age 3-5. I wouldn't get their name though. Please keep in mind I'm a little bit of a hippy and the only tattoo I have is a realistic piece of brocolli (smaller than a dime) on my butt because I lost a bet.

thiscantbenormal's picture

I know a guy who has several of his young kids art work on him and they look like hot garbage.  It looked exactly like the quality of work you would get from a scratcher.  Not everything translates well to a tattoo.

Sandybeaches's picture

Imagine if DH had a tattoo of BM's name.  For those that said they wouldn't mind or it was his body to do with what he wants, I am just curious how many would change their opinion?  Would you make DH get rid of BM's name? 

I for one do not like tattoo's as I have stated.  If my DH had BM's name he would most certainly have to remove it! OMG I can't even imagine how that would look if he kept it and how you could not think of BM every time you saw it !!!

beebeel's picture

When I see tattoos of kids' names on people, I automatically assume one of two things:

1. This mouthbreather can't remember his/her kids' names?

Or

2. This person is a an insecure/poor parent and this is a desperate, "look how much I love my baaaaaaby" grab for attention.

thiscantbenormal's picture

BM has a family tree tattoo and she had DH's name "scratched" out and the kids told him about it. She successfully scratched him out of their lives too.  

Thankfully he has no tattoos to represent his kids especially with how awful they have turned out to be.

advice.only2's picture

I don't think it's bad, but I had a friend whose baby died and they tattooed the babies name on them with his little feet and hand prints. It was a way for them to help heal.

Swim_Mom's picture

I finally got a tattoo on my left hip, that is seen only in bikini. I am the most conservative, last person on earth anyone ever thought would get a tattoo, including me! But my DD20 (then 19) got a tiny heart in same spot and I thought cute so it gave me the idea. To me having people in a tattoo is too obvious - of course you love your kids and husband. For years we discussed getting a dog. Finally 3 years ago as the compensation prize we got 2 Russian tortoises. I fell in love with them! I adore these tortoises, truly. So I got a tortoise tattoo Smile Now we finally have a puppy but too late for paw print tattoo because one is enough for me!

The real question is, how many people, in the history of the world, have gotten step kid name as tattoo? LOL ZERO I'm sure...

Elite2020's picture

No there is one. In a previous post above a cousin of mine has a tattoo with his Skids name, in addition to his own bio kids. But I am sure there is genuine like between him and his Skid. 

I have two tattoos and no one sees them. When I tell people I have two (when the conversation comes up) they are usually shocked. 

 

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

I had an ex who had his two kids' names AND two ex-SDs'  names tattooed on his chest. It made...umm... intimacy kind of awkward. He also kept his oldest SD's HS graduation photo (8x10) on his night stand. Yeah. That certainly didn't last! (Barf!)

ZoeScott's picture

it's his right, I mean, many people prefer to store their memories in tattooes, even if it seems weird for you)

futurestepmomnowstepgf's picture

of the child he thought was his for 3 years and turned out she wasn't. He got it when she was a baby and thought it was his kid, like most husbands do. So anyone who is familiar with my story, the child is no longer in bf's life. BM disestablished his paternity rights in October 2019 and now we have to wait until at least May 2021 to get the name covered up with something else because the marine corps regulations won't allow him to get it covered up now. So it will be almost 2 years by the time we can do anything about it.

strugglingSM's picture

I'm not a huge fan of tattoos. I think they became way too trendy several years ago, leading people to go overboard. I've also seen lots of bad or tacky tattoos that I suspect people must regret. For example, DH's cousin's wife has a huge lily covering almost her entire calf. It's not even well done and I've never heard it explained to have any symbolism, so it just looks like she was trying too hard to be cool. One cousin's husband has a bunch of tattoos of various things, including flowers on both hands. He's a chef and I'm not aware of any other symbolism of flowers, so to me, they just look ugly. Another cousin's husband has a bunch of random tattoos all over his chest and arms...then again, his personality is that he's a little crazy, so maybe they fit him...they are still kind of ugly though. DH and I are lucky that we both feel the same way about tattoos. Also, tattoos were illegal in my state until well after I was of the age to think getting one was an awesome idea, so I dodged a bullet with regards to getting a regrettable tramp stamp of some unknown Asian language character or other similarly non-symbolic symbol at age 18. My cousin - the one with the husband with the random collage of tattoos - got Winnie the Pooh tattooed on her shoulder around that age. He's cute and all, but really, what 40-something woman wants a Winnie the Pooh tattoo? 

I think if there is something meaningful to you and you can find a good tattoo artist who will give you a nice piece of art that you think you will love forever, go for it, but otherwise, people should remember all the things they *loved* 10 years ago and do not love now...and then think twice about how much they will love a permanent reminder on their body. 

That said, ideally, your child would always be meaningful to you, so if you absolutely love tattoos and are willing to pay for a nice one that you plan out in advance and don't just decide on minutes after walking in to the tattoo parlor. My friend got a tattoo that said "gone but not forgotten" and a birthdate for her brother who was murdered. She got it about 10 years after he was murdered, so she thought long and hard about it and it was not big or ostentatious. It was in a spot where she would see it daily and think of him. So, I think if you can find something like that, that you know will still mean something, then go for it. I also used to go to a salon where one woman had tattoos that were complete masterpieces. The person who did them was clearly a talented artist. I still don't think I would get one, but they were beautiful. 

Rags's picture

I suppose if someone is going to get a tattoo getting their kids names is as better reason than most.

My SIL (DW's youngest sib) is eternally spending countless $Hundreds on new art work. She and her DH both.  Then they invariably cry about their kids being hungry, having their house foreclosed, critical house repairs they cannot afford, cars about to the repossessed.

One of SIL's pieces is three roses with my MIL's name under one, and the names of MIL's two sisters under the other two roses.  

I would not be a big fan if I was first being intimate with a potential partner and she had her kids names or her mother's name immortalized on her body. Or anyone elses name for that matter.  Just as you noticed with the beach guy with his daughter's name across his chest. This is potentially a major limiting element for future relationships.

In that case, it would be a wrap it, tap it, and scrap it relationship if it even got that far.

newtostep26's picture

Sounds creepy. Hopefully it's on his back? I can't imagine being intimate with a man and looking at his child's name on his body while doing it. Lol.

Rags's picture

I had not thought of tattoos as a method for marking territory.  But it does make some sense when considered from the perspective of so many who stand in the toxic blended family opposition.

Though smart creatures mark their territory by pissing on something other than their own skin.

smh