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DH just shared a and his text

Someoneelse's picture

Sd16 asked if DH could bring dd17 and dd18 to dinner with her on Thursday.  DH said he could ask (which i hate him asking because DDs will make up excuses or just agree to go to not hurt DH's feelings)  then he offered the idea of her coming over for dinner (which in my mind would be better, so that if anyone has had enough, they could just leave and go to their rooms). 


I told him, i thought that would be the better choice, but also reminded him that "She has to learn that her behavior has real world consequences. This time is it pushed her relationship with everyone past the breaking point... it can be mended, but it's going to take time.  I know you want water to go under the bridge, but she has to build the bridge first." That's exactly the wording i used (i copy and pasted from my text with him.

He hasn't responded, i hope he took it well, i feel that i was being very  delicate with his feelings but still got my point across...

Rags's picture

So, is he taking the other two to meet with the problem child?


The building the bridge first idea puts the call to action on her and holds her accountable. An outstanding point.

Someoneelse's picture

I don't know where he ended it, but i know he hasn't asked my daughters if they want to go to dinner with sd. And that's my biggest concern, I've told them to stand their ground, but in the end of he asks, it's up to them. He knows i brought momma bear out last time he asked, they were giving excuses left and right, but he wasn't catching the hint that they didn't want to go. I had to put my foot down and i ended up hurting his feelings, i felt bad but i fell like he understood.