You are here

DH had finally had dinner with SD16

Someoneelse's picture

Long story short, SD left at the beginning of the month and refused to visit(DH's extended period of possession), she's been too busy for DH. Now DH was able to go have dinner with her. Shortly after he gets back from dinner with her she texts him

"I'd like to come back and start visiting EOWE in August"

DH responds without asking me "sure baby, that's fine"


When he tells me, i tell him, "I really don't want to feel like i have to walk around on egg shells in my own home.  It's been really calm around here lately."

DH- "I know, I don't either"

Me- "Don't forget DD17s birthday is coming up, and I think it should be her decision on if SD16 attends, especially since all SD's attacks was towards her."

DH- "i agree, I'll talk to DD17 about it"

Me- "I don't want DD17 to feel guilty about it if she doesn't want SD there. Her feelings were really hurt"

DH- "I agree"

I DON'T want SD here, but DH has been soooo depressed. I HATE how SD always comes back from the friggen tantrums like nothing even happened.  As I'm typing this I'm literally having a panic attack. I don't want my husband to be completely depressed.

justmakingthebest's picture

It sounds like he doesn't really want her back either- he probably feels like he can't say no to her coming even if he wants to say that. 

I would probably put my foot down about DD's party and SD not being there. Just don't make it an option. 

advice.only2's picture

I would tell your DH since he is incapable of protecting you and your children from his daughters abuse she has lost the privilege to be allowed in your home. Let him visit with her someplace else for the weekend. I did the same thing with my DH when Spawn moved out.

weightedworld's picture

Put your foot down.. it could be that he just doesn't have the balls and the guilt of doing it himself is too much. 

He may thank you for it later

Mine did. 

and it's MS. Bitch to his family ;) 

Someoneelse's picture

She's literally the only family he has left, his dad and brother passed away in the past 3 years, and when his dad died, his uncle BASICALLY disowned him, over DH not splitting what LITTLE inheritance there was with him.

I DID bring up that i'd rather him just go visit with her, but he says that when he did that he literally felt like she wasn't part of his family, that he was just visiting someone. I told him, she is the one that basically ran out on him, and I saw his face sink, that I told him his last family member just decided he wasn't worth it. His own daughter disowned him, over something SHE MADE UP, but still. How can I be so selfish? He said that we have to try to make it work, he CAN'T tell her no, to not come, that he doesn't want to lose another family member, especially not one that "WANTS" to make it work (I know that she doesn't really want to make it work, but he's blind to that, or at least is TRYING to be blind to that)

Winterglow's picture

Well, it looks as if he's just going to have to rent a place where he can see her because I sure as heck wouldn't have her back in my place nor would I be moving out. Looks like his list of possibilities is shortening by the minute.