Custody battle looms ..
Just venting .. or maybe looking for hope .. it's been a while since I've posted. Not much has changed in our custody arrangement; legal battle has been dragging on after delay and delay and delay. They go to court now, hopefully for sure, March 3-4. We had a baby 6 months ago so that has pretty much preoccupied all of my free time! But alas, the stress is starting to return
BM is military (Navy). Skids have lived with her for school years since the divorce. SD8 is in 2nd grade; SD9 is in 4th. In all this time, they've only relocated out of state one time; but BM has moved voluntarily in addition to her relocation. So all in all, this means that SD9 is in 4th grade, and in her 4th school.
She is voluntarily negotiating for new orders early. She plans to leave the state by next school year. She wants to go to TX (we are in MD) to further her career. BM has admitted that her move is voluntary, and not required by the military. She has stated that she is only moving to pursue promotion, but she could stay in her current duty station for the duration of her military service due to under-staffing of her position. So, a custody battle that has been dragging on for years now, is finally coming to a head in March. DH is terrified. Most of it (IMO) is unfounded .. he's a good dad, fights to stay involved, skids are involved and rooted in their lives here. They currently have joint legal/physical custody; close to 50/50 but not exact (due to distance, it's just impossible).
Further, their agreement also states that if she deploys or is duty stationed more than 30 days, custody reverts to DH. So even if she DOES get to take them, chances are they'd end up back here anyway (but not a guarantee; TX would be a teaching duty so deployment is less likely than a ship duty). When she relocated last time, DH agreed to let the skids go under false pretenses .. BM essentially lied in mediation and never sent the kids back when she was supposed to. This was 3 years ago now, but maybe the biggest downside to his case.
Further, while she was stationed in TX last time, she pretty much refused to allow DH any contact with the skids .. tried to refuse his visits, wouldn't allow phone calls, even told him not to contact their coaches/teachers. Most of that is all documented in email.
IDK .. I'm just ready for it to be over (not that it's ever REALLY over), but he's so stressed out that I can't help but to be stressed. Anyone else deal with anything similar? Words of hope/wisdom welcome!