My DH and I have been going to couples counseling for months. We are married as a religious marriage but not legal marriage. I know confusing. So he wants seperate money accounts His money, which he "says" is non if my business. Our house acct, and my acct. So we discussed in counseling that he overspends , he gives money away then uses credit cards. Counselor suggested generosity budget. Use envelopes put money in it. If no money, you cant give it away. He agreed. So when I ask him how much he was going to out in it he would not even discuss it. Counselor said use envelopes for house acct, entertainment acct, generosity acct. He again agreed said he understood. He said in counseling that I had explained it in such a way he understood he again agreed. Two days before he got paid I ask him what his dollar number was for each envelope. He became short, grouchy , and an argument began. I said after he said mean and hurtful things to me this ( Your just not going to do it and I give). I gave up the idea he would ever budget. I had told him in counseling that I could not live financially by the seat if my pants. My credit is over 800. I own my own home and have investments. I'm struggling really badly. This is going to kill our relationship and he just cant see it. We are going to fight every time we need to do something. Marriage isn't supposed to be like this. As an equal partner I should not have to ask him for money and neither should he have to ask me. We are one relationship with one financial goal. Supposedly. How can I get him to understand. In his first marriage his wife didn't work for the first 10 years. They had one bank account. Why is he doing this to me? I feel like a companion with benefits not an equal partner "wife". What on earth do I do know?