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BM's isse with SC Health, any way to stop it?

crimsonbeauty's picture

My h's children are normal healthy kids. Unfortunately their bm doesn't agree, even worse won't accept that they are. My SD went to the doctor/hospital 52 times in 2007, and my SS 28 times.

If a doctor doesn't agree with what she thinks is wrong she takes them to another until they do. She swears my SD has terrible asthma, however she is the only one to ever witness the child have any problems breathing in ten years. SD is also a state and national champion in a certain single competition and team athletic field (think along the lines of Dance/Gymnastics). She also take three different dance corses twice a week, plus choir, and two other practices for the other thing, and then practices 8 hours a day, five days a week for two months during her summer break. Now that child can run and play with her brother and my three children for a week straight and never so much as lose her breath so I don't see how she can have asthma without us seeing some signs of it.

Every weekend when the children come they have a big bag of medicines that the must both take, everything from steroids, to previcid, and two different inhalers for both of them, five to seven medicines a piece once to twice daily. (No her brother has never suffered any breathing problems around anyone else other than his mother either.)

Until we get the statement from the insurance companies we don't even know that they have gone to the doctor/hospital even though it is in the divorce decree that they must agree on any non-emergency care. So her answer to this when he started complaining to her about it is that she stopped turning over the receipts for him to reimburse her for her half.

Not to mention they can't eat hardly anything, even most veggies, Milk & Ice cream (but all other dairy products are fine), all nut products, fish, plus a lot of other stuff because BM told them they are alergic. She even tried to say that they were both allergic to our dog, but not their two house dogs, and my house plants, but not hers (most are the same type) Fortunately we have now proven to the kids on some items that they aren't so we can at least get them to eat some foods.

My question is what can be done about this? Is there anything my husband can do to protect his children? He contacted their main doctor and they did take them off about half of the meds they were on after we pointed out that some specifically said kids their age aren't suppose to take it and has since started telling her she needs to have them seen by someone else, which has now resulted in three different doctors seeing the kids in addition to the other two they have been seeing as well all year. Is there anything we can do to stop this before she ends up ruining the kids' health, or God forbid something worse happens to them?

Oh I almost forgot BM also insists that SD must see a chiropractor at least twice a year (always more though) to be manipulated so she doesn't get pneumonia. Every heard of that?

frustratedinMA's picture

This lady sounds NUTS!!!

I dont really have advice, but I do have a SD that claims she is allergic to MY perfume.. I pointed out that she didnt, as she never had any reactions.. the Skids have both claimed to have had sunburn as a result of our care.. and I can tell you w/certainty... they have never had a sunburn on our duty.

These women are just nuts in the head... and need to cause drama where there is none...

steppie1999's picture

We have had the same experience with BM but not sure what else you can do about it beyond what you've already done. Perhaps some legal advice to have medical records examined by court and a psychological exam for BM.:)
DH's son moved in with us over the summer and after about a week he was terribly sick...pukin' and poopin'...no fever but he felt really awful. I took him to the Doctor and he tested for strep (negative), ear infection (negative), etc. Doctor did not believe it was the flu due to lack of fever. It was a "mystery" illness. After we informed BM of illness she started harping that he got sick because we refuse to give him daily over the counter allergy pills as she always did. DH believes his son was going through "withdrawals" and I have to say I agree with him. After about a week of SS feeling really awful, he was feeling much better and he hasn't been sick a day since and that was 7 months ago.
I also believe our BM suffers from Munchasen's and feel that she is "poisoning" her own children by giving them medications they don't need. When SS goes to visit BM, she makes him take allergy medicine, which we have since told him that if BM gives him a choice of whether he wants the medicine or not (???) that he should not take it. She always gives then the "choice" but expects them to do what she wants.
She's a CONTROLLING PSYCHO!!!! and I fear for my SK's DAILY!!!!

"I prefer my life STRESS FREE...When you're STRESSIN'...You're STRESSIN' me"

Most Evil's picture

I know several hypochondriacs and they are very annoying and that is what this mom is trying to instill in them. Our SD is a hypochondriac and has never visited when she did not claim to have some horrible illness that is only cured by having her dad wait on her hand and foot. I think it is pretty innocent though and does not involve medication.

I think you should say something directly to the kids like, do you really feel like you are sick? why don't you tell your mom you don't want to take medication you don't need?

Since our BM was really taking advantage of our SD with housework and adult problems and would not let us get involved with her like we should be, we started encouraging SD to stand up to her mom, who is a bully. I don't know how old these children are but they will need to break away from their mom eventually anyway, to be healthy.

Fortune favors the brave" - Virgil

crimsonbeauty's picture

You've got it, DH pays for the insurance. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one that thought of that syndrome. I've asked DH just what are we going to do if his insurance gets fed up and cancels our policy. He says they can't do that but I'm not so sure.

That's what we were thinking, if we could get the courts to examine the records and do a psych exam on BM. When they are here they don't take their meds, by their choice, and they do just fine and have never had a single problem no matter how long we have them.

We have talked to the kids and their answer is usually "Well Mom says I am so I am." Had to talk to SD this weekend because whenever she doesn't get her way then her tummy hurts", I think we got our point across on that issue this time.