and seperated a year prior to that. No surprise they were headed for divorce, she was a serial cheater, abusive, narcissistic, pas aggressor and alienator, stole money and maxed out hubbys credit cards to get back at him...

she had been seeing her ex high school sweetheart prior to the separation and they rekindled their romance during a high school reunion and he left his wife to marry my hubby's exwife the week divorce papers were signed and judge approved them. 

Their kids didn’t know mum was dating and she marries this man while they were in school and when they came home, tells them they have a new daddy. 

She is a master manipulator and convinced the kids how traumatized she was hubby divorcing her to justify her going psycho... really? Is that why you remarried your ex high school sweetheart the week divorce was finalised??

she told the kids and friends that i was some half naked caucasian whore and she had to protect the kids. She has her 2 daughters spy for her and do detailed reports on me, hubby, our 2 toddlers together, pics of my toddlers are given to the exwife(something this crazy bitch shouldn’t have), especially considering she and her current hubby see witch drs to do black magic, she has her daughters belittle me in front of my husband and put me in my rightful place according to her.

now since a year ago i refuse to attend any meets or family events when sd’s will be there so exwife has banned meets as a repercussion. She ordered me like a puppet to make myself available for her kids. Ummmm nooooo..... they are a waste of my time...

you can’t control what they do but you can limit the effect it has on your household by how you respond.

for starters, my hubbys exwife does not and never will control me, her 3 kids do not question my authority regarding my kids ever!! The first time they smart ass answer me back is the last they ever try and they get a low condescending noooo which is when hubby steps in to support me. Exwife and skids do not have order me around or force or inconvenience me to change my and my toddlers plans to revolve around them and their every whim... 

you can only lay down the facts with skids but if they are so brainwashed, it won’t change much and will be a struggle. If bio mum wants to go on a bitchfest, let her rant like a psycho, the smart people will see her being petty vindictive and not moving on with life. 

Don’t let her control your lives, just enjoy living your life and don’t give credence to her

i want to buy a home that skids will never be welcome in as they are such toxic ferals. I want to enjoy living life and not letting their drama affect me or control me.

you’ll often find with these personality disordered people, they cannot let expartners move on, so since they are incapable of living normal lives, they need to create drama in expartners lives so they still have them on a leash. 

Its a total control thing

BM here was a living nightmare the first few years. So were DH’s parents. They had a hard time with the idea of DH petitioning for a divorce from his habitual cheating wife. They also struggled with how their adult son’s broken marriage and family would reflect on them. 

Due to BM’s abhorrent behavior, I went real strict, real fast with what skid could do in our house and in my, and my young children’s, presence. Basically, it was a lot of no iPhone out at meals. No photos or videos. It was the only way we could keep BM from having a window seat into our private life. 

Each and every time skid began a conversation with “My mom said/does/has...” DH would cut her off with a quick “We don’t talk about your mom here, tell me/us something in regards to you. I want to hear about what YOU’VE been doing.”

When my in-laws questioned MY behavior and motives, I told them to kick rocks. Things definitely got worse before they got a little better, but sometimes you literally have to show people how, and how not, you’ll be treated. 

Are you still a punching bag, as in your previous post? What about other things, that are more important than BM bad mouthing you - did you and your H go to therapy? What about him telling you how horrible you are and how you are not bringing in enough money????? What about getting pushed outside your house just this past September? Did he apologise?

Im sorry for not answering your question, but last post, EVERYONE was telling you to get out...

What happened since then?

Quit letting the peripheral crap distract you from the root cause of the issues  you are focused on.  DH is the issue.  If BM had DH's foot down her throat any time she spouts toxic crap and if DH had his foot up the asses of those in his family who are badmouthing his wife and driving tension into his marriage there would be no external toxcity.

Put your foot up DH's ass and quit letting the external crap distract you from confronting the real problem.