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BM can't keep her mitts off pic's

HadEnoughx5's picture

Here we go again :? Skids had their annuak school pic's again. Every year there is a problem because of BM.
6 years ago, my hubby was not getting any school pictures from BM. So, I said why don't I go to the school and get and extra order form? So, I did, I filled it out, put a check with it and handed it to the photographer. When the pic's came back, they went home to BM's. We would ask her to send the pic's with the skids the next time they came over. Of course that would never happen, finally after asking several times, we eventually had the photographer send us a new set.

Then we got smart and handed in the pic form and emailed teachers to make sure they did not go back to BM's. Well, one teacher listened and the other did not. The teacher that didn't listen, had to get the photo's from BM. By this time we had one in middle school, we did the same thing for SD12 who has been affected by PAS, and she managed to try and screw dad up too. But we got a set of pics from the photographer.

This year, we handed the pic form to SS11 and his response was "Oh damn, how did you know we were having pictures done today? " and then blurted out something in reference to keeping photo's from him (BF).

So this morning I was puting away laundry and found a pic envelope at the bottom of his closet. I opened it and of course...2 of our 5x7's are missing.

The slut took the 5x7's because I'm sure she found it degrading to have to go into the school to get another form and two, she thought she could get the pics for free. Well, we are ordering our pic's that are missing and puting the cost on her portion of the extra curricular activities.

Has anyone out there had to deal with something so immature as this? :?

briarmommy's picture

I don't know what to tell you except maybe the teacher could keep them at the school and you could pick them up there, inconvient but you would get what you pay for.

Our problem isn't getting pictures but being offered to many, SS goes to some hick school an 1hr and a 1/2 away from us and they don't even put a school calender out half the time only the sheet that goes home each week on monday. So SS has school pictures 2x's a year and at his school the form comes home with a sample picture after it is taken. Well BM always forgets and sends him in crummy tshirts that look like crap and then we look bad if we don't want to spend the ridiculous prices twice a year to buy bad pictures. I can go have his picture taken every year at olan mills in nice clothes for cheaper with a coupon, I would rather have that then the school pictures.

WeddedBliss.sofar's picture

We went through this exact same thing. We would pay for all the pictures, and then have to beg BM to give us some. It wasn't worth it. Now, we take the skids to a local department store that has a photography studio and have their annual pictures taken there and we give the BM - nothing. If she wants school pictures, she has to buy them.

I joined the photography studio's "club" and get coupons for packages for as little as $10.00, so it's WAY cheaper this way too, and there's tons of poses to choose from with different backgrounds. We love it and the pictures are always great.

You should look into this near where you live.

BSgoinon's picture

BM causes an issue about everything school related. Pics have been included in that drama. She has never actually kept them from us though. She does ask for one because she doesn't want to pay for them herself. Sometimes I just scan and email them to her. Other times I give her a wallet size. I have told her that if she can't afford the school packages she should take him to WalMart and have them done, it is much cheaper there. She doesn't do that either. She would rather buy her weed and smokes.

HadEnoughx5's picture

We tried doing a family photo at a department store a year ago. We told the skids that their aunt wanted a pic of them. If they knew we wanted them, they would give us a hard time. However, they still did everything they could to not cooperate. We were at the sitting for over an hour and two hours deciding what to buy.

Our BM rakes in plenty of $$$ and doesn't work, but acts as if she is poorer than dirt. Two days ago she told BF that she is thinking of going to Disney during the xmas break, but can't buy $13.00 in pics?

I told my hubby this morning that I want to reach up into her uterus and pull her ovaries down out her hole and wrap them around her neck and place the ends in her hands. Just like she likes to grab his nuts and pull him along for the fucking ride! }:)

It's all about the game to her Wink

HadEnoughx5's picture

I do. I guess I just need to accept there is no easy, hassle free solution as long as they are of school age. I think I will an appointment for the skids at Portrait Simple.

It's sad that BM is so immature about something like this Sad Thanks for your suggestions!

hopefulSM's picture

For us it all depends on BM's mood. Last year BM decided that she was no longer paying for any medical bills or co-pays. And she has the bills sent directly to us. I pay for insurance in full and DH gets no deduction on CS for covering the insurance costs either. So technically BM pays NOTHING for her own childs medical care. However, the dental office would not send the bill directly to us. So it went to collections, then BM told the collections agency that we were actually responsible for the bill and they sent the bill to us - all for $60!!! We were trying to buy a new house so we paid it. DH then said that he would not be giving BM any money for extra's and that she could just give us the pictures to pay off her portion of that dental bill. Of course Bm refused to give any pictures with out money. So we got none.

I wanted pictures of SD though and we give them to MIL, my mom, my dad, aunts/uncles/cousins/godparents, etc. So I took her to Sears to get them done. Went online got a coupon and I got all the sizes I wanted and it was cheaper and less of a headache then dealing with BM. Plus SD was wearing something decent, her hair was comb, she had bathed the night before pictures and her teeth were brushed. So they actually turned out nice. And it was fun for the two of us to go to the mall and get them done together.

Best part was she liked them so much and said they were so much better than her school pictures and asked if she could give one to her mom. I just smiled and said sure and sent one along back to with her for BM. I wanted BM to know that even though she kept the school pictures that we still got pictures and they turned out great! Plus it also showed SD that I wasn't as petty as BM becuase SD knew that BM was refusing to give us her school pictures.

Newstep's picture

This is crazy we go through the same mess with BM. She tries to get BF to pay for them so she can intercept them take what she wants and send us the leftovers. So last year he stopped buying them. She of course flipped out and demanded to know why!! How could he not purchase precious SD's school pics and on and on. It was hillarious and now she doesn't buy them either I take photos myself and we have lots of great pics of SD at our house. No need for school photos.

HadEnoughx5's picture

This is absolutely crazy :jawdrop: I thought we were the only people that had to deal with this level of immaturity :O

I love this website...there's a whole world of these whacky BM's out there. I'm not alone Biggrin

paul_in_utah's picture

I guess it's because I'm disengaged, but why would you care so much about getting the skids' pictures? I haver never had pics of them.

cc01's picture

I just had an ordeal with the bm in my life. My bf and I went on a trip with my kids and his daughter, and the daughter took like 400 pics. We had an awesome time, and when we got home, something told me to take the camera and make my own pic cd right away. But I didn't. I also didn't want the bm looking at all of our pics, seeing everything we did on our trip.

Low and behold, I tell my BF to ask the bm for a CD copy of the pics. Well, he computer "mysteriously" crashed and she lost not only OUR vacation pics, but all of her personal pics. She made DVDs of the pics, but its only a slide show. Can't print quality pics from that. I'm not mad, I KNEW she'd pull some kinda stunt like that. So, luckily, I not only took 500+ of MY own pics, I took videos too.

So predictable...

These women are nuts lol

HadEnoughx5's picture

My hubby and I have pic's of our children all over the house and we have enjoyed watching how the skids have changed over the years. I also scrapbook their school, sports etc., memories?

Newstep's picture

Me too I love to scrapbook it is my favorite hobby. SD and I scrap together as well. She is doing lots of pics from when she was a baby.

hopefulSM's picture

I'm pretty disengaged now too - as far as dicipline and picking up BM's slack. But I still want pictures of SD. I think it shows you care about them. We have 8x10 hanging in a row in our family room of all the kids - can't imagine if we didn't have SD up there how that would make her feel or DH. She's just as much a part of our family as the other kids.

The funniest part is that this is not how all BM's behave. I give my DD's BD school picture each year - the same amount each year and I don't require payment from him. The picture only cost me about $35. I have bigger issues to deal with then trying to get $17-$18 out of him. I figure he pays me CS each month anyways - it's not that big of a deal. Of course I'm not vendictive either and hell bent on making him "pay" for leaving me years ago.

simifan's picture

We had the same thing happen. Stopped ordering them from school. I take them to picture people & usually get better shots

cpreston's picture

wow, so everyone goes thru this? Last year, my Bio-daughter was the one to actually hide the pictures from us so that she could "save" them for her Dad. I ALWAYS give him pictures even tho he NEVER pays a dime for them. If he wants more pics than what I give him, why doesn't he just pay for them himself?
(BTW, school pictures are NOT cheap, so this is a real issue)

liks's picture

SORRY, I couldnt help you here...got enough pictures of tweedledee and tweedledum around the house as it is....

Makes me feel sick everytime I look at them!

I want them down so I can put my pics of my kids up...LOL

CalgonTakeMeAway's picture

We don't have to deal with "school" issues as my skids are home schooled. Yay..more time with PAS'ing BM. I'd rather be having the picture drama.