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Annual story time: Worst gifts from skid(s)

2Tired4Drama's picture

I've posted this in previous years but figure it's always worth reviving at this time of year!  Many times people comment that they've never gotten a gift at all (which is sad) but let's hear from those of you who have and how bad was it??   Not so much what small skids  have given but teens and above who should know better.

I'll start - some of SD's "gifts" to me over the years:   One pair of white plush footie socks with obvious evidence it was once a 3-pack; SD must have kept the others in the pack for herself and ditched the disliked white ones on me.   Another was a woolen MAN's sweater - not sure where she picked that gem up from but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a regift from BM's boyfriend.  

ldvilen's picture

What happens if you never get a gift from SKs (from the time they were kids to adults)?  Is that good or bad?

Iamwoman's picture

Join the club!

Ive never gotten a single solitary gift from skids (11 & 14) despite my having helped raise them for the past 8 years.

More sad? DH has also never gotten a single solitary gift from his own children.

DD (my bio, his step) has given us both many gifts over the years.

Gimlet's picture

Same boat.

IDGAF about the gifts for me, but it bums me out for DH a little.  Neither one of us a gift person, we both have different love languages, so a nice card would make him really happy.

DD here (also my bio, his step) also gives us wonderful gifts.  She's a talented artist so my favorite things are the ones she's made (a mug with Special Kitty in a crown on the side, I'm drinking coffee out of it right now - she doesn't love making "functional ware" but she will do it for me) or acts of service.

 

advice.only2's picture

My most cherished gift from Spawn was when she moved out and never came back, that was 4 years ago. Bless her heart every year she re-gifts by staying out of my life! She truly knows what I want for Christmas.

shellpell's picture

I'm tearing up. That should be made into a Hallmark Christmas movie: The SD who never came back at Christmas, ho ho ho!

Trying to Stepmom's picture

I can't quite remember which Christmas this was, but SD was maybe 9. DH and I would even take her out to buy gifts that were "from her" but she would show up with other gifts too. 

This particular year when she was maybe 9, she got me a bag of pretzels and a bag of chocolate chips because she knew I really liked chocolate covered pretzels. I'd like to think a 9 yo would maybe make the chocolate covered pretzels, but I've learned over the years that SD's thought process does not follow that thinking. 

Last year SD, then 12, also gave my 2yo an electronic drum toy with plastic drum sticks. One of those loud toys that parents hope for (insert sarcasm). She got it from a White Elephant gift exchange at BM's family get together and thought DD would want it. Safe to say that DH and I put it in the giveaway pile today. SD and DD won't figure it out for a while. 

Goodluck's picture

Can I tell you about the MIL gifts?

1/2 bottle of bubble bath for me. LOL Yeppers...

.  She would box up junk she would find in her hoard. One year she sent the kids old books...ok books are great. BUT inside she drew gosh awful pictures all over the white pages. THEN she sent a booklet that she made on how to draw. Step by step---of all her "magnificence". It looked like a 2 year old did it. That was her word for everything SHE thought about or did. MAGNIFICENT...BARF---

I made my bios write a thank you note to her....

Later I tossed everything Wink

 

 

advice.only2's picture

WOW!

Siemprematahari's picture

That I can recall I never received any gifts from my H's children, no hard feelings there but my MIL.....oh she was horrific! One time for Christmas she got me this ugly candle with the Ancient Egyptian Pharaohs on each side. She also bought this hideous sweater with an ugly fake fur collar that I swear would make you itch if you wore it....I ditched that too! You gotta laugh at this sometimes....

Hey its the thought that counts, right...

Lol

notasm3's picture

In the past decade I received ONE present from SS - which I know DH paid for and put DS's name on it. 
 

Now much (most) of that time SS was a jobless often homeless total loser. But even after he found a woman with a job to leach on - nothing changed. Of course I never expected anyone he was using to contribute anything to me or DH. 
 

All of this is moot now that he is banned from my life permanently. 

hereiam's picture

I guess I can't play.

I have been with DH since my SD was 5. Neither of us have EVER received a gift from her. NEITHER of us. I don't care about myself but she has never given DH a gift (she is now 28). Not for his birthday, Father's Day, or Christmas.

Siemprematahari's picture

WOW.....

So thoughtless......especially to her father.

JerseyGirl1970's picture

When we were dating, I asked my husband to buy me dress pants in shades of browns because I worked in an office at the time. He thought that it was a GOOD idea to allow his daughter who always passive aggressively competed with me, to pick out those pants.

The little bitch bought me these matronly tummy control shit colored slacks and a box of Gertrude Hawks chocolate. Needless to say they never made it on my body and were donated soon afterwards.

Another year, her father gave her money to buy me a gift. She went to Ulta, spent the money on makeup for her MOTHER and gave me the free with a purchase  bathrobe that was thrown in.

I make charitable donations in her name to the local Salvation Army instead of buying her gifts that she never liked, used or appreciated these days and let her know via greeting card.

2Tired4Drama's picture

I got a similar thing from SD, too.  It was a "free gift with purchase" item that she threw it in a used gift bag and handed it to me for my birthday gift.   The thing that irks me the most is she really expects an enthusiastic "thank you" - for her thoughtlessness!  And my SO sits there like a dimwit acting like it's just wonderful.

Jcksjj's picture

I've never gotten a gift from skid and I'm sure I never will.

And jumping on the MIL gifts - my mother in law actually takes great pride in the gifts she gives people. It's very important that she be told her gifts are amazing and also that anyone who gives her a gift know that they could have done better.

2Tired4Drama's picture

My ex MIL was the same way.  We lived in Europe for awhile and from there, I sent her a high-quality leather purse, hand-painted ceramic serving dish which matched her decor, 18k jewelry, etc.  I spent so much time looking for the perfect gifts for her and it was quite an expense to ship them to her.

In return, as an example, she sent my exH a very expensive hand-made designer sweater and TAPED on the outside of his box was a small, clear plastic bag with a fake gold chain in it - the kind you get at a flea market.  That was my gift.  

Mountains's picture

...one year both DH and I got a wreath from SD(48 at that time) made of used shotgun shells which did not make it through TSA security (2007)

....the next and last gift DH and I got was in 2016 and it was $2.99 tin of cookies from World Market.  Of course the invoice was inside so that’s the only way we knew sent them (SD 57 at the time)

 

SusieCue's picture

... To the store and pays for them to pick out gifts for me which I have said is not wanted or necessary but he does it anyway, I think to spite me. So this last year SD15 babysat for a good part of the year and had saved up about 1k. DH told her that she had to get me a gift with her baby-sitting money and she gave me something she already had at home. So I returned the favor and gifted her a very used eyeshadow palette. 

Miss T's picture

.. which is fine with me. I can't be arsed to get him anything, either. Actually, that's not fair. He's taken to bringing over a bottle of nice brandy or some such at Christmas. The booze he selects is generally not to my taste, but it's the thought, right? I still can't be arsed to get him anything. I'm irredeemably horrible, I guess.

Speaking of Christmas gifts, I'll never forget the year bio mom had SS bring over a brightly wrapped package for DH. It contained pajamas and bedroom slippers, and she had gone to the trouble of writing out a gift tag specifying it was FROM HER to DH. It took me hours to explain why the "gift" needed to be sent back in the grimy little hands that brought it.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

In general, my DH's adult kids are selfish and not In the habit of giving gifts to anyone.

In the past I've shared about the last time DH and I ever ho$ted Chri$tma$ for his people. Everyone was supposed to bring a side dish, the adults had drawn names for the Adult Gift Exchange, and we'd spent a fortune on gifts for grandskids and teen step grandskids. Narc OSD, her H, and their combined brood of six showed up with a bag of potato chips as their contribution to the meal. They ate and drank most of the food, received most of the gifts, and stiffed DH and I in the gift exchange. I wish I'd had the courage to say something clever or ask where our gifts were, but I was still trying to keep things limping along in those days.

YSD is a different kind of disgrace. At age nineteen, she packed up and ran off while DH and I were both at work. It was three days before Christmas, and she even took her presents from under the Christmas tree. I kid you not.

Best Christmas gift I've ever received from skids? Absence.

Kes's picture

When the SDs were younger, I sometimes got gifts which had obviously been languishing, unused, in the back of a dark cupboard at NPD BM's house.  The worst of these was a small bottle of vinegar, covered in dust.   Another of their tactics was to buy the tackiest thing in the £1 shop (ie all things are sold for not more than £1) - one that stands out in my mind was a really horrible make up bag.  I don't think these type of things even made it to the charity shop, which is what I usually do with unwanted gifts - they just went straight in the bin.   

I have a bit of a thing about nasty and/or inappropriate or "regifted" gifts, as my mother was the world's worst for this.  I would much, much rather receive no gift at all than a piece of secondhand rubbish.  

Trying to Stepmom's picture

Reading some of these comments makes me think...

My DH told me what Christmas was like when he was with SD13's BM. She would buy a bunch of gifts for SD but they would all be cheap stuff from the dollar store or seemingly expensive things (gaming system, tv, etc) but you knew they came from the pawn shop. 
 

When SD was younger (7 or 8) she would count how many gifts she got and said things like "that's it?" and "I got so many gifts at my mom's house." It took all my nerve to not say anything to the ungrateful child. 
 

So it's no surprise to me that she would just find things around her house to give to us (probably BM's idea) or purchase little things from the dollar store. She's grown up knowing what her mother does for gift giving and follows suit.

The last few years it's been a struggle to buy anything for this child (ugh, teenagers!). The other day she actually told us she just wanted money so she could go out and buy what she wanted since no one ever gets her those things. Yeah, except she's never specific enough nor does she even know what size clothing she wears (which boggles my mind). She did say she wanted LuLuLemon leggings because everyone else wants them. (Insert eye roll) I had to stifle my laughter because no honey, your father and I are not buying you leggings that are $60+!

2Tired4Drama's picture

I firmly believe that BM has been behind some of the so-called thoughtful gifts I've gotten from SD.  Like the man's sweater which probably was a re-gift that was something BMs boyfriend received.  

clydella's picture

I got a good one for ya, my SD gifted me a Christmas Ornament with a picture of her sitting on Santa Claus' lap, when she was 18 years old, personalized with her name and everything.  Because that's exactly what I wanted ya know, a pic of her to put on my Christmas tree every year.  My DH doesn't even ask where that's at, he knows it will never go on our tree

Gracefulsilver's picture

I have never gotten a gift from SD.  She has also never bought a gift for mt SO or my kids.  The only time she ever gave her father a gift was when I took her out and paid for it.  My 2kids give my SO birthday, Father's day and Christmas gifts.  SD has failed to even make him a card for any of these holidays.  SD refused to even be in the same room as my kids on their birthdays while they blew out the candles and ate cake, She was "too busy" to be there.  Yet, she expects all of us to drop everything and buy her stuff for her birthday, Christmas, Easter, etc.  Nope I won't give her a gift again except for Christmas and it will only be a gift card for a small amount because my SO always gets nice gifts for my children.  And SS23 has never givengifts either, and refuses to speak to his father or meet me.  It's the same road SD is headed to and I hope my SO sees it.

Ispofacto's picture

Killjoy is a perfectly "correct" person.  She's a frigid priss with her nose in the air, and if you stuck coal in her butt you would get a diamond.  She always says and does what she thinks everyone wants to hear in public, but you all know how she is in private.  Like any narc, appearances are everything to her.

I'm a real person who values authenticity.

So she actually did remember xmas and mother's day, etc.  But she gave things to me she got DH or me to pay for.  Like one time I took her to Dollar Tree to buy some toilet cleaner and she had me buy her a small cheap scented candle, only to gift it to me a couple days later for xmas.  Like checking off a box.  I'm not materialistic at all, but I found her entitlement disturbing.  She could pat herself on the back for very little effort.  I mean, the gifts were never really from her.  

And then when we enrolled her in a babysitting class to tame her entitlement, she threw a fit and raged, "WHY WOULD I EVER WANT TO BABYSIT??"  (This was before she abused my GD.) . Indeed, why would she ever want to work at all?

It reminds me of an excerpt in the book The Gaslight Effect, about a man who gave gifts to his wife all the time but they were things he knew she wouldn't like, and he made it all about himself and what a great guy he was.