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CPS vs Custody Order

southernshellgirl's picture

I'm so frustrated I have to blog it out.

CPS caseworker told DH and I that BM tested positive for meth and she is obviously mentally ill, but they cannot do anything about her visitation rights to SD because the Family Court Order trumps CPS.


They are strongly recommending DH and I go back to court to have the order modified to only allow BM supervised visits with SD.

DH and I can't afford to go to court! We can't afford the 20 grand we owe the attorney for getting custody of SD last year. Yet, we do not meet the reqirements to get free or discounted legal services either.

I just don't get it. If CPS has the evidence BM is unfit and SD is in danger with her, why can't they take it to court to modify the order and PROTECT THE CHILD? That is what they do right?

I just keep thinking there has to be a way they can do it. Our caseworker is fairly new to the field and has admitted ours is the worst case she has had thus far. I'm praying for a miracle that an answer will be revealed, and quick.

Anyone ever heard of anything like this???

Any suggestions on what we should do???




Most Evil's picture

That is terrible - I don't have any good advice, just that I don't blame you for being upset!! Can someone check w/caseworker's supervisor to see what can be done? Surely they will not just know this and let it ride?

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

Zimka's picture

to see if you can get supervised access for the BM so she is never alone with SD with out going to court. I would of thought the childs safety is the most important thing, more important that a court order???

southernshellgirl's picture

safe should happen. If the court order prevents that, cps should be able to change the order. At least I think they should.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I---
I took the one less traveled by,
and that made all the difference. -Robert Frost-

bewitched's picture

"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere

Surely they can do something! If nothing else, catch her using in front of the kids-or something...have her arrested...she's getting the stuff somewhere-have they been in the home? Has she got a meth lab in there?...if she's in jail she can't have custody.

A kid living with - even visiting-a parent on meth is child abuse.

southernshellgirl's picture

like a crazy person. Her apartment is spotless!

I wish we could catch her.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I---
I took the one less traveled by,
and that made all the difference. -Robert Frost-

southernshellgirl's picture

The caseworker is supposed to talk to her supervisor and get back to us. Now it's the weekend so we'll prob have to wait.

Thought I'd add update.

BM called Thurs about an hour before she was to get SD for the weekend and told me she was coming but first had to go to emergency room for her hand. I was freaking thinking suicide attempt. I asked BM several times if she needed help and she sounded pissy and said no. I asked what happened and she said, "I don't want to talk about it, it's a long story, I was moving furniture."

THe CPS caseworker came to our house trying to wrap up the case that started in Feb and when she heard BM was coming to get SD she decided to stay. She said she has been trying to get back with her but BM will never open the door.

BM has new boyfriend bring her to get SD and has a huge bandage on her hand. Caseworker asks to talk with BM and finish up the case and BM agrees.

After BM took SD :sick: Caseworker tells us BM told her a different story about her hand. Apparently, BM punched a wall because she was so mad at DH the night before! I was pretty upset afterward at the caseworker because if DH and I had known BM hurt her hand by any violent act, we not have allowed her to take SD. Caseworker and BM had agreed to meet at BM's apartment the next morning. Caseworker says she also told BM it was not a good idea to have her new relationships around sd.

The next morning the caseworker called me after she met with BM. BM's new boyfriend was there and she admitted to the caseworker he SPENT THE NIGHT!!! I seriously fear for SD as BM is obviously unwilling or unable to do anything in the best interest of either of them.

She had to go, then called me back shortly and told me she needed to put us on standby and be prepared to meet her at BM's to get SD. She called back and spoke with DH and told him she had done a drug test on BM and she tested positive for meth, she called the pharmacy to inqire as to whether or not her bipolar meds could cause the result, they said no. We met her to get SD and they weren't home. BM had been instructed to be there so the caseworker could coplete the investigation, but didn't follow that instruction either, obviously.

We were able to get ahold of BM's mom. And she had SD, and brought her to us. BM's boyfriend came to her apartment while we were there and the caseworker was able to meet with him. He refused to take a drug test. Dh and I are sickend by the fact that the boyfrind of two weeks must have a key to be going to BM's apartment when she is not home. Caseworker had him sign an agreement that he will not have any contact with SD and will not be with BM when she has SD.

BM and her mother are both defending BM saying the test results must be because of the bipolar meds. Guess we'll see....

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I---
I took the one less traveled by,
and that made all the difference. -Robert Frost-

Nymh's picture my years of being a SM, that CPS is for all practical purposes, useless. They take children away from parents who are completely fit and leave children with parents who are an obvious risk to their well-being. They refuse to investigate obvious problem parents and households, and when a parent doesn't cooperate with an investigation, they simply let it ride out to the maximum investigation time and then close the case as unresolved.

You can't count on CPS to do any dirty work whatsoever. They are honestly underpaid and severely overworked. I feel bad for those workers who drive all over the countryside chasing down bad parents when they can't really do anything about it due to lack of time, funding or training.

I hate to say it hun but if you're wanting to get custody from BM you're prbably going to have to go to court to get it.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

TinaKay's picture

wrong here as CPS has the right to remove children from the home pronto, until case is heard in court.
Soemthing doesn't jive, call the CPS's supervisor and see why, specifically they are not removing the child from the home.

If you are not the ones involved, think about it... when ?does a court order for custody stand in the way of CPS taking a child out of the home to protect them?

Call CPS's supervisor, get specific answers and find out what the plan is as it may just boil down to an incopetatant case worker who is assigned to you and the info they have given you is incorrect.

southernshellgirl's picture

I know you've had your share of dealings with CPS over BM also. As disappointing as it is to me, I think you are absolutely right.

And like you said, we can't blame the caseworkers, they have rediculous rules and time limits to follow.

I just don't get it! The caseworker did say if she hadn't been able to finally catch up with BM she still would have had to close the case as it had been open too long. ??? This just started in February, does CPS honestly think issues of abuse or neglect are resolved in two months?

ANd while she was here, the caseworker commented on how because BD is under the age of three, she may have to refer us to services where they will come to MY HOUSE twice a month to monitor her!!! There has been no report against DH and I for anything relating to my BD, who was not born when BM tried to call CPS on us last year the day after she lost in court. Even if it would be because of that false report last year, that case is closed. Shouldn't they spend their time and money persueing people like BM whom they have seen evidence against?

Sounds to me like CPS is only interested in cases where the people are cooperative and nothing is wrong! I was nothing short of shocked.

I just HATE THIS! I know you're right about going back to court, and that's what CPS is telling us too, but we JUST DID THAT! Excamation not at all directed at you Nymph, I know you know how frustrating this is. WE just fought our butts off in court to protect SD and we won! WE spent thousands and still have a balance of 20 grand owed to the attorney. WE paid the $400 for the court social study for the evaluator to 1. have a heck of a time getting BM to cooperate, 2. not get cooperation from those living with BM at the time to get a full view of what she was exposing SD to, and 3. State in her preliminary report that BM is "Extreamly immature for her age and would benifit from counseling". But the recommendation of the court evaluator was still that Dh should be primary and BM Joint managing and allowed extended standard possession of SD.

I'm so confused, even the caseworker hasn't got the answers for me. She's saying that now she cannot close the case, and until it is closed DH and I cannot get a copy of the report. SD should not be placed back with BM, but CPS cannot prevent her from having possession of SD because of the court order for possession. Without the CPS report, DH and I have no evidence against BM to show in court for us to protect SD by stopping her court ordered possession times.

We're trapped!

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and I---
I took the one less traveled by,
and that made all the difference. -Robert Frost-

TinaKay's picture

deal directly with caseworkers supervisor, caseworker should give you solid answers of the laws and what can be done.
CPS is a govt agency with full police powers and detailed protocol, they do not deal in maybes as their job is to protect children.