SS looking at porn
My spouse recently found explicit drawings made by my middle school aged stepson. She did not tell me about this incident and I did not get to see the drawings myself. All I know is they were pornographic in nature and depicted women in a degrading manner. I found out about the drawings through other channels so I didn't confront my spouse. I also learned that he merely explained the drawings away as a "dare by one of his friends from school" and my spouse took no further action. I trust my wife and do not believe she keeps things from me. However, in this particular case I know she was afraid I would make negative judgements about my stepson's behavior. I feel she is often overly protective of her son and tends to minimize things when he does something wrong. He often manipulates my spouse by lying his way out of any trouble. I don't know if she believes him or not but she often lets things pass either because she falls for his lies or doesn't want to confront him. This has come up in counseling and I have stated my feelings to her multiple times but nothing has changed. In addition to the drawings my stepson was caught looking at hardcore pornography via the internet on two separate occasions a few years ago. Given his history of viewing porn, plus the drawing incident I decided to investigate further by analyzing the website traffic on our family WIFI. I found evidence that he was again visiting porn sites. I immediately informed my spouse and we immediately put parental filters on the internet. She also informed his biological father who agreed to do the same. In hindsight we should have all done this a long time ago. My spouse confronted my stepson and after denying it several times he finally confessed. However, I was shocked to find out she plan to take any further steps and asked me not to say anything to him myself as it might "shame him". She dismissed it as him being a normal boy that is curious about sex and there is nothing for me to worry about. I also found out that his biological father brushed it off and didn't hold him accountable in any substantial way either. While I take my share of responsibility for not having the parental controls on the internet I do have to say there's a long track record of this child not being held accountable for is own actions. He knows he's not supposed to look at porn and when he was caught doing so he lied about it. I feel I'm much more concerned than my spouse and fear he may have an addiction. When I suggested the possibility of addiction to my spouse she was unwilling to consider it and brushed it off as me overreacting. We also have a biological daughter together who is much younger and it goes without saying that I do not want this kind of activity taking place in our household.
My question to the forum: Despite potentially causing a major stir should I make a stand with my spouse and insist that he be taken to a professional therapist to determine if he's got a problem or not?