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What to do???

Stacybush's picture

Bio mom is a total naturalist(sorry think that's the right term)and HATES modern medicine. That being said my 12 yr old Stepson "Gerry" has been diagnosed with ADHD and other psychological conditions that require control with meds many years ago. BM has been fighting my husband regarding this for years and wants Gerry off meds. The Dr's are the ones recommending the meds not us and both my husband and I ARE not drug pushes. Gerry does not just have a mid case of ADHD. He has severe "rages", hypertensive to almost anything and has severe problems dealing with other children. He has no friends do to his behavior problems. Since they share legal joint custody legally BM can't take Gerry off meds without my husbands consent. Here is the problem....We believe BM has been encouraging Gerry to not take his meds. Recently Gerry has been caught throwing his meds out at school and lying saying he took them. Now that Gerry is getting older its harder to catch these things at home. Gerry has not had any issues with the meds before and there is no reason for him to be doing this unless its being encouraged from BM. Gerry really needs his meds to keep his mood stable so how would you guys handle this? BM is to smart to get caught so we really can't do anything regarding the court systems.

Rags's picture

Directely supervise your SS taking his meds. He takes them under direct observation by his dad or by you and he does not leave until he demonstrates that they have been taken.

Sadly what happens in his idiot mother's home cannot be controlled by your DH or by you and more sadly it cannot even be very effectively controlled by the courts. If BM is endangering the kid with her earth mother crap your DH may be able to get sole physical and legal custody with supervised visitation for BM.

Were I your DH I would have my attorney going for broke to make that happen.

Good luck.

Stacybush's picture

Directely supervision is what we have been doing and having him open his mouth to show us he swallowed the pill. Real pain to do this twice a day and we have a strong suspicion BM is going to if she has not already encourage Gerry to fight us on taking the meds. If this happens its going to be a huge problem as Gerry is already bigger than me and can be quite physically aggressive if provoked(reason for the meds). Not to mention he spends 50% of his time at BM which we can't control if he gets the meds or not.

Stacybush's picture

Yes and he says they make him "tired". One would think thats a possibility except for two things. One hes been on this med for over 5 yrs and never had a issue till now and two thats the same thing BM said in court stating one of the reasons she wants him off it. Soon after he stated saying the same thing BUT only when we catch him throwing it out. Otherwise he never complains about being tired and sure does never act it.

Stacybush's picture

Yes the aggressiveness is not from ADHD. This poor kid has like 4 different mental disorders. We have been to different Dr's as BM keeps trying to find one who will support what she wants...NO meds..All the DR's including his Social worker says he needs meds.

Anything is possible BUT its hardly likely this resistance is coming from Stepson as he's been on meds since he was in pre school. He does not know any difference its just a way of life for him.

Harry's picture

Thes drugs makes the person taking them feel different. They don't want to take them because of that. As they get older they find out these drugs stops them from sexually working. Even if it's by themselves. Another reason for stopping the drugs