You are here

Books written by Bio Dad?

steelgirl92's picture

I am just wondering if there might be any books floating around out there that are actually written about stepmoms perhaps by their husbands? I'm thinking something like this could be very helpful to those of us dealing with Disney Dads and guilty Daddy syndrome and constantly hearing that we "don't understand". If there was a book about this written by somebody who does understand the guilty daddy side, but also understands his wife's struggle, maybe some of us could reach a breakthrough with our DH's.

Or maybe I'm just searching for unicorns?

Rags's picture

There is no justification or understanding the side of a Disney Dad or a "man" suffering from Guilty Daddy Syndrome.

This is my opinion... and I am a man.

I think the way to address what you are asking for is the smell test. It works. If a situation does not pass the smell test then that is all anyone needs to know about it. If it stinks, it needs to either be fixed or disposed of. Disney Dad or Guity Daddy behaviors stink. There is no viable reason for these behaviors and they do no one any good. Including the kids and definately do no good for the dads.

Just my thoughts of course.

CANYOUHELP's picture

I still like the book by Celia Rivenbark, Rude Bitches Make Me Tired, " but that book is more about my steps, than the father.

So how about, "Doormat Daddy Has Rude Bitches Who Make Me Tired," catchy next best seller?

steelgirl92's picture

I'm not looking for justification for guilty Daddy, I'm with you, there is none. I'm looking for something written by a daddy that explains that. Something written by a bio dad, preferably one who is married to or in a relationship with a women who is not the mother of his child, that explains the need for boundaries and discipline in order to maintain a healthy relationship all around. I can find plenty written from Stepmoms point of view, but father writers on this subject seem to be few and far between.

steelgirl92's picture

Haha don't get me wrong, the made up titles are great. And you are so right, Father's seem to have a deepest tint of rose colored glasses.

moeilijk's picture

Only slightly off-topic: I read this post recently on FB "Humans of New York"

“I smoked dope every day for twenty years. I thought I was pretty slick. I could smoke while working. I could get high and still run my company. I could pour concrete. I could roof a building. I felt like I could do anything. But it ruined my marriage. I didn’t even realize it until years after my wife left me. But the dope ruined my marriage because it made me content. Nothing could bother me. Her feelings didn’t bother me. Her needs didn’t bother me. The dope put an emotional cover over what should have been obvious. I told myself that if I didn’t see the problem, then it didn’t qualify as a problem. All I ever did was give her advice. I never asked for it. I never once felt the inspiration to say: ‘Darling, I know there’s something wrong. What can I do differently?’”

I am sharing it here because I think being divorced is like dope to Disney Dads. It's carte blanche to duck responsibility.

It's hard to be a good parent. It's easier on the outside looking in, because you have perspective without your own emotional drama-fest cluttering things up. But it's even harder to be a bad parent. You don't get to enjoy your kids, you don't get to feel confident and proud of yourself, you just live with discontent and insecurity.