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Frickin Mother's Day

lorlors's picture

So I stop by a nice clothes shop with my step kids and I am in the changing room trying on a dress. Earlier in the day, the skids are telling me what they have got bitchface for Mother's Day- a teddy bear, mug etc loads of sweet little things.

So, I come out of the changing room and my Sd12 says, 'mum would love those earrings' and points to a lovely pair under the counter. I obviously couldn't say no it being Mother's Day the next day and look like I was mean.

I just never thought I'd end up buying that woman f##king jewellery given all she has done the past few days is bitch and moan and DEMAND that my fiancé pay private school fees for SD12, despite the fact that SS13 goes to a great school near to their home and there is no reason why SD12 shouldn't go there too.

I just feel like it is EXTORTION after she got a vast settlement including house with pool yet she STILL has her hand out.

Someone on here had once referred to BM as 'the golden egg and the golden uterus'. Unbelievably true, still trying to dictate how we spend our money.

No particular question really, just wanted to say I sometimes cannot believe the BRASS NECK of these entitled bitches who still try to live off their ex husbands. They gravy train has stopped. Time to get off your arse and get a job.

twopines's picture

I wish you had said no. They already had gifts for their mother. I don't understand why you would look mean for not buying them.

hereiam's picture

Then you should have told her "no".

"I'm sorry, but I don't think that's appropriate," or "ask your dad," or something like that.

At 12, I feel she is old enough to know better than to ask the SM to buy the BM a gift.

This crap will never stop if you and your fiance don't put a stop to it.

hereiam's picture

'mum would love those earrings' and points to a lovely pair under the counter

"They are pretty, I think I will buy myself a pair for Mother's Day."

That's what you should have said and done.

lorlors's picture

Thanks for that fightincrazytrain. I just felt put on the spot as the earrings were out of the glass counter and the shop lady was right there. I know she is a child but at almost 13 I had a bit more cop on than that!

cfmommyof3's picture

If it had been me I would have said ya those are pretty (BM is remarried) you should see if they have the same ones around BMs house and ask your stepdad if you guys can get them for her. Sorry but stepdad married her so to me that's his problem. Not mine or DHs.

Orange County Ca's picture

I also don't really understand the pressure you felt and succumbed to. My response would have been effectively that if she wanted to buy them I'd loan her the money (if I knew she had some or some way to get it) and she could repay me when we got home.

If she didn't have money I'd explain the habit of saving and how one saves for unexpected things and since she didn't save this year it'll have to wait. Perhaps BM's birthday would be the day to save towards.

It's done now. In the future she can be reminded that being a teen now she's expected to buy her own gifts to give and should find a source of income and/or save her allowance.

lorlors's picture

Point taken Orange County and I got an allowance as a kid but for some reason the BM doesn't give the skids an allowance but says ' if you want money for something just ask'. To be honest, I find this bizarre, raising kids that don't know the value of things. I had an allowance as a kid and it's important to learn to save for things you want.

christinen's picture

That is really bizarre- she isn't teaching the kids anything about the value of a dollar if the kids never have to save money for something they want & they can just ask & get it. That's really bad.

AllySkoo's picture

"I'm not clear how your post went from helping SD to feeling like BM is still controlling your money?"

Yeah, that's what I didn't get as well. I'm not saying your BM isn't a money-hungry, greedy, controlling beyotch - just that in this one particular case, she didn't actually do anything wrong. SD was the one who asked to buy the earrings, BM wasn't even there. Blame SD for putting you on the spot, but (this time anyway) you can't put it on BM.

Calypso1977's picture

no way would i have bought those earrings or any item unless SD13 truly had nothing to give her mother.

for all my SD's annoying and atrocious behaviors, she knows better than to ever ask me to buy her ANYTHING for herself, mom, or anyone.