What's his deal? Food issue
When DH and I first got together and I was around the skids I would always hear DH talk so much about how his kids like to eat. Oh his kids can eat their plate and then some. It was annoying. Like okay- encourage them to be fat asses. Ironically they did eat like grown men, yet never gained weight. But it was always "Oh my kids can eat" and he would say it all proud with some stupid grin on his face.
DH would order pizza and let them order salads and garlic bread and pop and wings.
We would go out to eat and they would need an appetizer, flavored lemonade, dinner, extra sides and dessert.
We would go through the drive thru and they would order a value meal, super sized and add some extras- cookies, milkshake, apple pie.
A meal was never enough. It was always a meal and then some.
So DH obviously has no issues making sure his kids "eat good".
Now my issue is that DH has a problem with my BS9 "eating good".
It's just DH, BS and I in the house. I do all of the grocery shopping and cooking. 85% of the time I buy meat on sale and stock up. Because it's just the 3 of us, I can afford to buy more expensive meat or food items- steak, shrimp, etc.
However whenever I cook these items, DH makes a big deal about BS "eating like a king."
BS has NO IDEA that him eating a steak costs more then him eating a hamburger.
Here are a few recent examples:
#1- I bought Haggen Daz ice cream bars. You get like 3 for $5- way over priced. Anyways I was eating one the other day and offered BS a bite and we shared it. So last night he asks me if he can have one of those ice cream bars. I told him we could share it again. But this wasn't before DH had to mention it like 4 times that those were expensive ice creams. That it was Zero's treat and those are expensive and BS should be lucky to have the expensive ice cream. WTH. Ice cream is ice cream to a 9 year old.
#2- While BS was getting the ice cream bar out, he noticed I had a thing of popcorn shrimp in the freezer. He mentioned it saying he couldnt wait to eat it for dinner. DH made this big deal "Oh yeah you get shrimp. You eat like a king" Dh says to me "My kids ate hot dogs when they were BS's age." I'm like the fuckin shrimp was $5 at Aldis! It's not that serious.
#3- We went out to dinner for our anniversary at an expensive resturant. DH got a steak that was $42. He didnt eat it all and brought it home. BS saw it in the fridge and asked if he could eat it. I said to DH "If you aren't going to eat your leftover steak can BS have it? You dont have to give it to him, he can have something else." DH was like noooo it's fine I probably wasnt going to eat it anyways. (Honestly I am the one who asked for a box, DH was just going to leave it). However we have now heard many times "Oh BS got to eat a $42 steak." "Oh you liked that $42 steak, must be nice to eat like that."
I'm getting really fucking annoyed.
#1- BS has NO IDEA what the cost of food is and I feel that DH is trying to shame him for "eating like a king". I am the one who picks what BS eats.
#2- I buy all the meats on sale. I also try to cook better food. I'd rather have my BS eat a nice piece of chicken then a hotdog.
#3- Its different circumstances. I can afford to feed BS "like a king." I have ONE kid and I have a GOOD job. We dont need to eat hotdogs. Unlike DH and BM who had 4 kids when they had CRAPPY jobs.
#4- Of course the double standard- DH's kids are entitiled to eat good, but BS- oh no it's a sin!
#5- I think there are some underlying issues with DH's mom and growing up. She was a POS mom. So in some ways I think that DH is "jealous" of what I can and do do for BS.
When DH starts on the food issues I automatically get pissed. I start cussing and pulling his kids and what they eat into it. It makes me mad.
Any ideas on how to best address this issue with DH?