FIL, SD, & BM
Yesterday, DH got several lengthy text messages from FIL. What does this have to do with SD and BM you may ask. Well, FIL apparently did reach out to BM about trying to see SD now that they live within 30 minutes of each other again. DH's half sister is apparently going through a divorce, tried to kill herself, and so she has been living with FIL. Not only that, but she has some unemployed criminal boyfriend coming to FIL's house and she is doing meth. After talking with FIL, it seems he only saw SD at her Christmas program at school. BM offered FIL to take SD back to his house for a couple of days. Which is totally weird when SD hasn't seen or talked to FIL since before she was 2.
Plus it is really annoying because BM is against DH having the 2 days missed made up over the summer because we have Christmas break in 2023... but BM had both fall break in 2022 which we didn't know SD would have plus Christmas so it will be 7 months from when we last saw her in summer until spring break. PLUS BM also has fall break this year because it is not in the CO because at the time the school SD was going to attend did not have a fall break. When fall break was brought up, BM tried to say fall break is maybe only 3-5 days. DH then sent her last years academic calendar and the 2023-2024 academic calendar which proves fall break is actually a total of 10 days off. Guess what? BM has not responded since being sent facts she cannot argue with. Had we known, we would of asked for fall breaks on the years we do not have christmas. We will be bringing it up this coming fall asking BM is we can have fall break on those years (2024) and when she says no, DH will try to reason with her, but then is ready to have a judge decide if it comes to it.
Anyways, FIL told DH all of this to tell DH that he told BM he won't bring SD over until DH's sister is out of his house because he doesn't want her around SIL. Well FIL, I am so glad that you aren't bringing SD into that, but at the same time, besides the drama with BM, this is why DH told FIL he will not be involved with anything to do with if FIL sees SD on BM's time.
If that isn't enough drama, SIL has drained FIL financially, sounds like not only is she living with FIL, but FIL is paying for her divorce, etc. Mind you, SIL is in her late 40's now. FIL was irresponsible with his money, who knows if it is with just SIL or what else, but he has $32 after his house payment due in 2 days to last for a week until he gets paid the following Friday. DH and I are considering sending him a little bit of money so he can afford to eat for the week. It is really tough because FIL did it to himself, but FIL also helped DH with his legal bills when going through the divorce and custody battle with BM and it would of taken a lot longer to of been done if it were not for FIL. DH and I agreed if we do it, it is not going to be a pattern. We both are worried that the money won't actually go to food for FIL, I am considering paying a grocery store nearby to deliver him food to the house instead. The issue with that is FIL lives in a really small town, so we might not be able to do that. We are also worried about DH's SIL or his slimy BIL finding out we sent money and next thing you know they are trying to hit us up for money.
Of course all of this would be happening while we are in the middle of escrow on buying our home. This is exactly why we keep FIL at arms length and don't associate with majority of DH's family because most of it is exactly like what is currently going on. We already were not sharing information with FIL we wouldn't want the world to know, but after knowing he is communicating with BM, we will be following that even more so.