You are here

Real, or not real? Truancy report part 2 #2

CLove's picture

Last night, Husband mentioned he got another truancy report...#2. Threatening to prosecute. I asked my teacher friend, she response with "oh they send all kinds of letters trying to scare the parents but they dont do anything about it, its really bad..." etc.

So, he did speak with principal. Principal told him if there are more absences, they will revoke her interdistrict transfer.

Background: SD16 SMPS goes to school one town over, west of us. Its becoming a pricey area with million dollar homes and its close to the coast. Our town is industrial and agriculture and, well cheaper property values.

Husband has asked me not to ask questions or talk about his daughter with him because it makes him feel bad. I did sort of say something about Freshman Year of Crapping on Clove.

I said "ok". But you all know me and I have major "monkee mind", and tend to obsess. SO. But I just shut my further commentary off and before ending the convo, I simply said, "you know its ok to be dads wife and its ok to be my husbands daughter. I didnt make her I didnt give birth to her and youve stated clearly you want zero parenting from me, so please dont tell me "thats your child too...and I wont be involved or talk about things, unless it starts to affect me..."

He promised he was going to talk to her tonight and get her mother Toxic Troll on the line.

No mention made about the grades. Its all about the truancy. So, this lead me down the rabbit hole of wondering why do they even care so much? Wouldnt they want to keep the students there? Is it about money? Ok, how do schools get their money anyhow???

Ok, Monkee mind is minding its own business. 


AlmostGone834's picture

What happens if her interdistrict transfer is revoked? Where will she go?

CLove's picture

Theres a high school within walking distance. SD23 Feral Forger graduated from there.

so senior year would really suck for her - shed lose her friends shes known for years, start fresh with new kids, and lose her ROTC.

CLove's picture

If she had her permit, that would be sort of funny.

Im just curious how the school system "decides" where her home school actually would be. Because previously her mother lived right in town, but now is near a totally different school north of us.

notarelative's picture

Here the school is decided by current residence. So if TT is the custodial parent it would be the school her current residence is zoned for.

However, most districts here don't check custody orders for residency. As long as one parent lives in the district, here it is possible to register the child with the address of the non custodial parent. 

justmakingthebest's picture

I get that the truancy is a big deal and she needs to understand that she will be moving schools if she doesn't get her act together- but grades are JUST as big of a deal.

I have a friend, who I often disagree with, but her exH makes it very hard to even remotely feel sorry for him. Anyway, he son failed last year big and her response was oh well, ex is on the hook for one more year of CS. 

I just can't even.... Grrrrrrr.... He is a dirt bag and should have lost everything in their divorce and the way he treats his kids is despicable- but the fact that she found a "positive" in her kid failing just baffles me. I am sure that TT has the same thoughts. 

CLove's picture

And Ive mentioned to Husband that he will be on the hook for another year of Child Support if child fails high school.

The teachers dont WANT to fail the kids.

To her, she just does the minimum required. Im sure she will skate along and squeek out with a c average. But he needs to parent that child. Consequences to actions.

notarelative's picture

In some places they track the four year graduation rates. Truancy impacts grades. If they feel a truant student is close to not having enough credits to advance to the next grade, it benefits their stats to push the intradistrict student off to their home school.

AlmostGone834's picture

Good point! Here in NY teachers are under a lot of pressure to pass the kids along. I taught for a couple years and one of the ten million reasons I got out of the field was the pressure from the administration to pass every child at every grade level so we could roll out the big banner in front of the school the read "100% graduation rate!!". Nevermind that some of these kids were reading at a elementary level and couldn't do basic math. The screws were put to us to try any trick in the book to get them through the state exams and keep "butts in seats". I have absolutely no idea how the English and Math teachers managed to get a few of the students we had to pass the state exams but I'd bet my bottom dollar something shady was going on somewhere along the way. 

CLove's picture

Its about money and stats. Its apparently in California a case-by-case thing for prosecution which equals more money in fines.

So...I think Husband can use the "threats" as a way to scare SD16 SMPS straight...into class that is. I just think he has given up, but I cannot say "upsets him". EGADS.

Rags's picture

My offical response if I were the NCP..... "I am not the CP, this isnt my problem.  Speak to  the custodial parent. Buh-bye"

However, the kid would rue every second they lived in my presence and I would be dragging the CP to court constantly by the proverbial short and curlies.




Rags's picture

I get avoidance of tension and issues. I hate that stuff as well.  I never have found addressing the problem to ever be as difficult as I have built it up in my mind to be.

Hopefully your DH knows who the CP is.  If he doesn't.... wow.


Happy Thannks Giving CLove.

MissK03's picture

I think there is a bigger issue here. SDs parents never really gave a F about her schooling. You did the work clove then she started turning into FF.. NOW she is becoming a total dropout basically... I find it interesting how deep she has fallen the past year...

I think SD should try to talk to someone (therapist maybe) to help her out. I think her home life, possible school life and other factors you guys might not be aware about are causing her to tumble.

CLove's picture

Doesnt believe in therapy.