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Its been awhile, naturally I'm here to b*tch about the inlaws

Jcksjj's picture

So I haven't been on here much because there hasn't really been anything to report stepwise.

Until today, when I posted some pics of my kids, and DHs uncles wife felt the need to comment asking where SD is. "Cute pics, but uncle ___ wants to know where SD is?" 

Why does that need to be asked publicly, and why on earth would someone that isn't at all close to SD (I've met them twice I think, and they haven't even met the ours kids) feel the need to post that? Reeks of MILs gossiping to me...

Comments

Noway2b1's picture

Seriously I would block her so fast. I've began cleaning my socials of idiots and that would rank right up there. OSS, his wife and grown daughters are all blocked after showing me who they really are. I'm cordial face to face but don't need/want them creeping my Fb then crap talking me and my family like they did in 2020. 

Jcksjj's picture

I did. Like seriously, am I supposed to publicly gossip about my husband's personal business with some lady who is basically a stranger? 

I'm sure they all took me blocking her as an admission of guilt, but whatever.

Noway2b1's picture

Good for you, yea I expected something to be said, by OSS at the very least, but I think they know not to push me on things. It would get ugly and I would call them out, so it's best they let that sleeping dog lie. 

notarelative's picture

It's always amazing to me that someone would ask this.  I'd be tempted to answer publically something snarky like 'with her Mom'. where else would she be?' we don't lock her in the closet and take the other kids out.' 

But, realistically, I'd probably message her that DH only has limited time with her and life for the other children continues. Just as life continues for SD when she is with her mom. Then I'd block aunt and uncle from seeing my posts.

Jcksjj's picture

She hasn't even been at our house since Sept, refuses to come over at all at this point. I guess we need to make a public announcement of that since it's apparently everyone's business.

SeeYouNever's picture

I have seen people do this (it's always an MIL or SIL it seems) and had it happen to me too.  They know where SD is, they just want to make you uncomfortable and let you know they're watching. It's so freaking irritating. 

I wonder how many stepfamilies would be doing better if the in laws weren't such jerks. Of course the stepmom gets resentful of the whole situation when the in laws tell her she's being watched and judged. And then when she disengages? Aha they were right all along she is evil!

I just ignore it. 

Jcksjj's picture

Oh that's 100% what it was. Looking back, she doesn't typically engage with my posts at all. Just wanted to make us feel bad.

strugglingSM's picture

Oh, yeah, DH's cousins and aunt, who we never see, and his siblings will comment and like pics with SSs in it, but ignore pics of our DD. When our daughter was a newborn, DH posted a bunch of pictures of her. One of them had SSs in it and his cousin (who lives across the country and who I've seen twice in 7 years), said, "I like the one with all your children in it." Um, okay, thanks. 

Jcksjj's picture

I can't comprehend how people think its ny of their business at all and decide they should get involved? 

Dogmom1321's picture

Good for you for blocking them! I don't understand either why some people think they have a right (especially publicly) to know the details/dynamics of your family. I also don't post pics of SD11 anymore. Honestly, she doesn't even take ANY with us anymore. DH has quit asking too. The last time she did (first day of school pic with her dad) she refused to even smile. I'm sorry, but I don't want to post a miserable looking SK on my page. It's no ones business! 

 

Also, MIL used to tag me in pics of SD when she was a baby/toddler (those little "time hop" or "on this day" memories that pop up).  I wasn't even in her life then... why would I want to post it on my page? Just send it directly to DH! No reason to involve me. I kept untagging me in them and I think she finally got the hint. 

Jcksjj's picture

We ran into this uncle once when we were shopping and he glanced at the boys in the back and said "brought the whole crew today, huh?" Didn't even notice SD wasn't with. So it's even more strange that he would supposedly be so interested in where his great niece he sees maybe a couple times a year is.

CLove's picture

Many times over the years, I have noticed that the inlaws ONLY like stuff if DH is tagged, or DH and skids in it. I "like" all their posts that I see. 

And a few times comments of "where is SD22 Feral Forger?" when they know full well where she is - not with us. Once Ive reached out via private message to let them know. Now I simply delete the comments.

Jcksjj's picture

Yeah it was the same with the likes for me. At least with MIL. 

Really i think asking about SD when she refuses to visit is just being a jerk, but who knows what gossip was told to them. Probably just told that we don't include her in our pictures, since that's what MIL has always been so worked up about.