The Mini Shrine
I do the laundry at our house and put away the clothes
There is one drawer that I don't normally go into and that is the small dresser drawer of Chef's where he keeps his summer bandanas (he shaves his head year round.)
The other day I went to get a bandana for him while he was out on the tractor and noticed that there is a letter tucked away in the back from the HousesHitter (YSS now 18.5) sent back in November 2015.
This would put him at stb 13... the writing looks as though a first grader wrote it for one thing.
And that is not unusual since he is a good 8 years behind in reading and writing as well as mathematics due to extreme lack of parenting . Even the envelope is written so incorrectly it is surprising it got to our mailbox at all.
He uses his last name incessantly as though Chef doesn't know who he is (PAS technique number 427)
The letter goes on to say:
"Dear Dad,
hi Dad it's me (full name including first middle and last).
Here is a picture of me so you can still see me and how I look. ( enclosed school photo)
Love (you) With My Heart ( first middle last name)"
I had no idea he kept that in his dresser drawer. Chef is probably unaware that he has two whole boxes full of stuff from the skids and child support records up in the second story garage in addition to this mini shrine.
I can't blame him for holding on to the last vestiges of the child that he thought was going to be so different from the other older too.
He is different all right in the fact that he is the worst of all three. Of course I knew that from day one when he was a toddler; as soon as he began to speak, the Girippo -n- clan started their scorched-earth PAS campaign with him.
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Comments
Do all divorced dad's have a
Do all divorced dad's have a drawer (or two) like this? They are just sad. My DH keeps the programs from SDs dance recitals in his. In the first one she has his last name and a dedication from mom and dad. In a later one she has a hyphen with his last name and BMs and a dedication just from BM and her parents. Then she has his last name again but in the dedication it has BM and her stepdad. He doesn't have them from more recent years.
Sounds familiar
Chef's grown nephew has two daughters like this. They go in and out of abandoning the family name.
How sad. DH has mementos, but
How sad. DH has mementos, but he has a good relationship with the kids. I wonder if they will ever comprehend the magnitude of the PAS or be able to break free of Gir.
Judging from the oldest two
I sincerely doubt it. And the fact is that he is the most PASed out of all three. If they did reunite I don't think Chef could stand it because they have been raised to be such brats it's unbelievable. I'm sure it will become ever more apparent as my granddaughter gets raised properly.
Such a shame.
Such a shame.
I know he has to regret how
I know he has to regret how things turned out for them. I think calling one letter a mini shrine is quite a stretch..it's one letter, maybe just to as you said, remember when he thought things may be different. I honestly don't think I'd resent a dad holding to a few mementos of his kids-whether they are in good standing or not-but especially if they aren't in good standing- that's the only thing they have left from the relationship. I'd just leave it alone-certainly with his temper don't mention you found it.
I don't begrudge it
But it was just odd to find after all these years of radio silence. Consider it ignored.
I kind of think this is a dad
I kind of think this is a dad thing overall. My dad keeps a dresser drawer full of drawings, cards and silly little things my bro and I gave to him growing up. I was kind of touched when I found out. We are very close but I think maybe most dads do this? Regardless of whether they have a good or bad relationship with their kids, I have seen a lot of guys be surprisingly sentimental about this stuff