No Social Interaction
Hi Guys, I wanted to reach out to you all because after 3 years I am still struggling to be a step-parent.
When I first started my relationship, my SD was 8 and now she is 11 and its becoming more and more difficult. When her Mum gave birth to her, the Dad was not in the picture so she has been brought up by her Mum and and grand mother. At first, I was ok with my SD, she was annoying but nothing that worried me. As she has got older, she seems to be more distance now than ever. She struggles to socialise with people anyway even in the family but with me, she doesn't speak to me unless I speak to her and avoids any eye contact with me. She also sometimes makes me feel uncomfortable because I know she is not comfortable around me. The relationship she has with her Mum is fine, she is basically her slave and will do anything for her.
There are things about my SD that make me wonder if theres an issue, i.e. she doesnt like loud music, she doesnt like having "FUN" and I mean that, she hates being silly or doing anything that makes us laugh. She doesnt like it when me and her Mum play fight, she gets angry and walks away. She doesn't like change or having a different routine, she is constantly stuck to her Mum and follows her around the house. When I am downstairs, she will go upstairs, as soon as I go upstairs, she will go down to sit with her Mum. It makes me feel so uncomfortable and like an outsider. I feel like I dont like her personality at all, she loves spending money and wont go anywhere shopping unless she is getting something out of it. She hates anyone telling her what to do and always has an answer for everything. I am just losing my patience with her. I have made any rules from the beginning and been chilled, but her behaviour is not working well with me. I have spoken to my partner several times about her and sometimes she feels I am picking at things for the sake of it, but I am not. Its something that is on my mind and I can't help it. I just dont know what to do and I feel as she gets older, it will get worse.